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Y Tu Mama Tambien

Amen. 22 May 2008|11:02am
By Conrado de Quiros
Philippine Daily Inquirer
First Posted 00:14:00 05/15/2008

I read with much interest a couple of bishops' take on gays. Their remarks were occasioned by several other Church officials earlier expressing their unhappiness over gays participating in the Santacruzan traditional parade, which they said tarnished the image of the Virgin Mary. It stirred up a minor storm last week.

Bishop Jose Oliveros, chair of the Catholic Bishops' Conference of the Philippines (CBCP) Office on Bio-ethics, says that contrary to popular belief, the Catholic Church is not intolerant of gays, it is liberal with gays. The Church, he says, has come to terms with them. 'We try to be compassionate and understand homosexuals and guide them towards the right path where they should not act out on their desires.' By itself, being attracted to the same sex is not a sin. Doing something about that attraction is.

Bishop Leonardo Medroso, CBCP Commissioner on Canon Law chair, agrees. He has a rather clever way of proving it. Catholics, he says, are forbidden to have sex outside marriage. That applies to everyone, man or woman. 'Marriage and sex, as the Church views it, are solely for reproduction. That's the nature of marriage, opening up a couple to producing children. We cannot have that in a man-to-man or woman-to-woman relationship. Therefore, sex between persons of the same sex becomes unnatural and offends the Church.'

The argument is clever. It says nothing about whether being gay is aberrant or not. It merely says that all sex outside of marriage is a sin. And since gays may not marry (at least each other), then any sex by them is a sin!

The easiest course is for gays to just bolt out of Catholicism and shop around for a faith more hospitable to their cause. Though I grant that isn't easy: Islam seems far more forbidding, with its irascible 'May Allah strike down the unclean' attitude toward those who do not fit the mold. I don't know what the Buddhist, Hindu and Confucian positions are.

But not all Filipino gays will want to do that, many of them counting themselves lucky to be embracing Christ—in the figurative sense of course. I personally have gay friends who are good and decent—why shouldn't they be, they're no different from the rest of us—who are self-professed Christians, and who have gay relationships. A couple of gay women I know are even planning to have kids by artificial insemination. They cannot imagine a God that is compassionate and merciful who will consign them to hell because of it. But that's the wonder of it, how the Church insists on practicing the religious equivalent of Procrustes' bed: If the person does not fit the bed, cut off or stretch his arms and limbs until he does.

The Church's doctrine on marriage in particular should be enough to drive Catholics, straight or gay, into the arms of Hinduism, which extols the virtues of the Kama Sutra, or at least does not frown on it. The idea that marriage and sex exist solely for procreation could only have been invented either by masochists or persons whose nerve endings have been dulled to a state of insensateness. One is tempted to say that this is a case where the sheep should assure the shepherds that sex, or getting laid, or f---ing your brains out—three ways of expressing a miracle of Creation—is one of the most intense, well, religious experiences they can possibly have. But I doubt they need to be assured it at all. If they did, the Pope wouldn't have to publicly apologize to the victims of all sorts of sexual abuse by the clergy.

The idea of a couple, married or not, having sex in order to procreate is hilarious. It conjures the image of them hard at it (no pun intended for the male partner), enduring the ordeal, determined only like soldiers pinned down in trenches to persevere out of a sense of duty and finally to break through in one great rush. What a perverse and joyless act that is. I doubt any Christian, short of an ascetic, will fill the bill.

Whatever happened to love? Whatever happened to ecstasy? Whatever happened to two people, straight or gay, bonded by feelings that cannot be expressed by words, needing to express themselves to each other by flinging themselves into each other's arms and surrendering themselves into a consummation devoutly to be wished? Surely that is part of the magic of life?

Which brings me to the argument that the Church is not proscribing against gays, it is merely proscribing against gays acting as gays, or that it is not demanding that gays do not get attracted to other gays, it is merely demanding that gays do not act on it. I don't know about you but I found Ang Lee's 'Brokeback Mountain' to be an honest-to-goodness love story, ranking up there with 'When Harry Met Sally' and 'Sleepless in Seattle.' Gays do fall in love too, and what I figure is unnatural is to compel them on the ground that it is perverse or that they cannot procreate to abort it. There is nothing more natural than love in whatever form it takes. Sex is not overrated, procreation is. Demanding that gays feel but not fulfill is not Christian, it is sadistic.

I don't know the finer points of theology, but I've always had the impression that what distinguished the Old Testament from the New Testament is that the New looks at the world more positively. Where the Old Testament called on fire and brimstone to befall those who failed to obey their ten 'Thou shalt not's,' the New Testament called on God's grace to fall on those who obeyed his son's single commandment of 'Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.' That seems like a pitch for tolerance and largeness of spirit. Last I looked, if Jesus Christ frowned on anything, it was on prissiness and hypocrisy, preferring the company of fishers and a reformed (?) prostitute to those that scorned them.

It was so unnatural they nailed him to the cross.
2 milk drops squeeze mah tits

Rice and Lettuce 19 Apr 2008|09:42pm
music | Keane - Everybody's Changing

The urge to blog is here so might as well take advantage of it.


Today is my dad’s death anniversary. It’s been 8 years. We have survived 8 years without him. I miss him terribly at times. There are times I desperately need and want a father figure. Today is one of them.


I find the reasoning that Filipinos shouldn’t worry about the possibility of rice shortage because we can always eat camote stupid. I don’t know about you, but I highly appreciate the Filipino cuisine. I love Japanese, Italian, Thai and even Indian, but nothing beats Filipino food. It is home. Wherever you may be, basta may Sinigang, Mechado, Menudo, Afritada, Bicol Express at kung ano ano pa, you will still feel at home. Can you honestly pair any of those viands with camote? C’mon. And don’t give me the shit that you can eat pasta all your life because I’ve tried eating only pasta for the whole week, promise nakakasuka. Well, it doesn’t work for me, at least.

Rice is staple not only in the Filipino dining table. Imagine sushi without rice. First off, I believe that the issue of rice shortage is overkill. The government would rather import rice from the US than sell its own rice to its very people. It’s all about money. Maybe it isn’t really a shortage, but the production of rice has dramatically decreased for reasons like global warming, corruption in the national budget for agriculture and even land conversions. Something should be done now. You know what, I really don’t know. I’m no expert in this issue. Ang point ko lang is ayoko ng camote. Period. Nyahahahah! Parang sinabi mo lang sa Italiano na isubstitute ang Pancit Bihon noodles sa pasta. Stupid di’ba?!

And the lettuce girls of PETA can rally all they want in Quaipo, but I just don’t think that the vegetarian diet is for Filipinos. Poor fishermen. It’s a brave thing what those girls did though. They wanted attention, and attention is what they got. I just don’t think their act was classy. Rallying clad in lettuce undies and in Quaipo of all places?!? For crying out loud hehehehe!

You want class? This is class.
2 milk drops squeeze mah tits

Kaibigan, mag-usap tayo... 29 Aug 2007|09:46pm
music | Roger Sanchez - Another Chance

Charot! I so hate Boy Abunda. hihihih!

Anyway, let's switch places. I'm not in the mood to blog, but I'm in the mood to talk. I'll post different topics that I want to blog about right now and tell me what you think of it.

First, the new Wowowee controversy. Watch this, and if that wasn't cheating, then I want a logical explanation what that was.

And then read this. My view isn't as strong as the others who commented but just what kind of foolishness was that?!

Lastly, this is my video of the moment. Why? Because I can very much relate to it. My heart is smaller now sabi nga ng YM status ko. I officially broke up with Jesse yesterday. And yes, this time it's for real. Just how many heartbreaks can a person take?

8 milk drops squeeze mah tits

Very well said, Lalaine! 22 Aug 2007|11:42am
music | Ben Harper - Walk Away

I forwarded the stupid article of that fake and fat (sabi nga ni Puchoy hahaha!) Malu Fernandez to Ate Aby, who forwarded it to her Ilustrado editor, Lalaine Chu-Benitez, also the publisher of the said publication in which my sister will have her own column soon (Congrats, sis!! Mwah!!).

Ms. Chu-Benitez emailed Manila Standard, People Asia and the advertisers of the publications this:

To the Editors of Manila Standard and People Asia:

This is regarding the articles 'From Boracay to Greece' (People Asia, June 2007) and 'Am I being a diva? Or do you lack common sense?' (Manila Standard Online, 30th July 2007), written by your columnist Malu Fernandez.

We are among over 2M Filipinos who are based here in the Middle East, and to say that we were shocked to have read the above articles that you deemed fit for publishing, is a gross understatement.

We will save our comments about your columnist who is so obviously lacking in knowledge, understanding and finesse, but the real question here is how your publication (with your team of educated and qualified editors), known for its "fairness and objectivity", allow such ignorant and putrid display of bigotry.

That you allowed your publications to be a dumping ground of "personal garbage" mocks true freedom of the press and has truly degraded, not only your paper, but also your entire staff.

Just in case you don?t know - there are over 2M Filipino expatriates in the Middle East region. Apart from facilitating the billions of dollars in remittances that help keep our country afloat, this community also represents a huge potential market for Philippine-based industries.

Furthermore, Filipinos have contributed greatly to the growth of the region, just a small example is the phenomenal infrastructural development in cosmopolitan Dubai, the New York of the Middle East, which was largely the work of great Filipino architects, engineers and planners. We have senior executives, managers and directors in different business fields, as well as educators and entrepreneurs. And our compatriots who work in blue-collared jobs (comprising only 17% the UAE Filipino segment) are some of the most well-educated and sought-after workers (as compared to other nationalities) in that category.

A lot of us here are trying very hard to uplift the plight of our kababayans who have sacrificed their lives to earn a decent living outside the homeland, but it is irresponsible articles like these which perpetuate the Filipino stereotype - that we are all uncouth, uneducated victims of our own circumstances--- and yes that we cannot be united even if our lives depended on it.

While we squabble amongst ourselves in an ugly discussion started by such a negligent act, the rest of the world looks on shaking its head in consternation, at yet another "onli in da Pilipins" episode. And because perception is reality, we OFWs out here have to contend with another kind of discrimination---thanks to our very own people.

It is tough enough to compete and earn respect within the international community, without such actions weighing us down even further.

These are very sad times, not only for OFWs but for Philippine journalism...

Lalaine Chu - Benitez
Publisher & Editor

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Burn in hell, Malu Fernandez! 21 Aug 2007|12:47pm
WHO THE FUCK IS MALU FERNANDEZ AND WHY THE FUCK DID PEOPLE ASIA EVEN PUBLISH HER FILTH?!?!!??! Well, I don't know who she is, but I do know what she is--- a fat and ugly bitch pretending to be above her fellow Filipinos because she's got money and travels to Greece and wears Jo Malone--- that's what she is. Why did People Asia allow such degrading remarks on OFW's to be in print and for all Asia to read?!?!

Her stupid article was published in the June 2007 edition of People Asia Magazine. Don't read if you don't want your day ruined.
Page 1
Page 2

Malu Fernandez, I hope you read this, you lowlife! Kapag hinubad mo ang damit mo at pinagpawisan ka ng matindi, hindi ka na mukhang tao. BABOY KA SA KATAWAN AT SA UGALI. Kinakahiya ko na may kalahi akong tulad mo. You may be rich but you certainly have no class. You owe our OFW's an apology, you sow.
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My goodness, I wanna go here!!! 18 Aug 2007|05:33pm
music | Tori Amos - Pretty Good Year

From Wawi Navaroza's Multiply


Penguin Cafe, Aug 17, '07, 7pm

with performances by


Oh please I wanna go!!!!! Somebody take me!

2 milk drops squeeze mah tits

The Talented Ms. Jose 15 Aug 2007|12:25pm
music | Makiling Ensemble - Embryo

Gay, my friend from Taguig, watched a taping of LoveSpell yesterday in BCDA Pamanayang Diego Silang because she lives there, her hubbie is a PNP colonel. I honestly don't know what that is because I rarely watch TV, but it features those housemates from Pinoy Big Brother. I couldn't care less about them, but Gay told me the Jaclyn Jose was also there, and she talked to her. Gay told her she's got a friend who's a big fan of hers. Kadiiri talaga, I hate it when the word "fan" is used because I am so not a fan boy ahahhaah! Anyway, yeah, so Gay told her I'm a fan, and she smiled daw and said thank you. She looks suplada daw at first because of her strong mestiza features, but she's accommodating when you approach her.

Jaclyn Jose's one of the few celebrities that I want to meet in person, and I'm even considering forming a Yahoo group for her like what I did to Chin-Chin and who knows di'ba hahahaha!! Chin-Chin's one of those celebrities who has a lot of admirers and followers, but her adoring public isn't your typical jologs "fans club" na nakikipag-away sa mga message boards kung sino ba mas magaling, si Bea Alonzo ba o si Ann Curtis hahahaha! All they need is an avenue. I'm very happy that Chin's Yahoo group is strong, healthy and alive as ever, and quite frankly, they can do away with me.

So going back to Ms. Jose, Gay took pictures of her for me:

She plays a palengkerang sosyal na nanay daw thus the outfit.

Oh I just love her. She's an amazing actress who can do just about anything.
squeeze mah tits

The Bovine Diva recommends:

Rarely would you find an artist who plays the piano and writes her own songs, and Regina Spektor does so beautifully. Her music is both poetic and poignant and sometimes vague. I love that her style is raw and most of her songs sound happy and her lyrics are free flowing but the storytelling is intact. Begin to Hope offers 12 tracks, all beautiful and eccentric.

The Last Song Syndrome:

I've been learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes-
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning them again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness, forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore.

The Heart of the Matter


Even if I stop wanting you
A perspective pushes true,
I'll be some next man's other woman soon.
I couldn't play myself again,
I should just be my own best friend,
Not fuck myself in the head with stupid men.

Tears Dry on Their Own

Amy Winehouse

My Personal Icons

Elizabeth I
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Jesus Christ
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My Favorite Artists

Alanis Morisette
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Bob Dylan
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Renee Zellweger
Sarah Brightman
Tennessee Williams
The Wallflowers
Tony Leung
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My Favorite Reads
Ang Kagilagilalas na Pakikipagsapalaran ni Zsa Zsa Zaturnnah
Catcher in the Rye
Flowers for Algernon
Like Water for Chocolate
M. Butterfly
The Color Purple
The Hours
The House of the Spirits
The Last Temptation of Christ
The Little Prince
The World According to Garp
Tuesdays with Morrie
Supertoys Last All Summer Long

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American Idol
Food Network
Queer Eye For the Straight Guy
Sex and the City
She-ra: Princess of Pwoer
The Brini Maxwell Show
The Osbournes
The Simple Life
Survivor 2: The Australian Outback
Yo Soy, Betty La Fea

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