Date:	2003-05-02 23:01
Subject:	U asked for me to update so here it is.
Security:	Public
Mood:	depressed
Music:	The very worst part of u is me.

I wonder how movie night went and if u cuddled...i want to cuddle with you...but ur so far away.

I want to be with u forever. The thing is, after the summer its goign to be hell...so man yproblems are coming. U have my jealousy to dealk with (always an issue) My job..ur job...the trips u and ur family take. Teh trip tp Puerto Rico i am taking. And my fuckign jealousy. U need a guy that can be with you 24/7. he can take u where u want and will always be there to hold u in his arms. I cant be that guy while working. I want to be so badly. And there are better guys than me...i can name guys and give u a reason.

1.Gavin-Has his own car.
2.John-has his own car, lives a street over, uve always had fun with him..
3.Cianchetti-completely devoted to any girl.
4.Joe-though gay he can always be there.
5.Any guy-has a higher self esteem than i do.

I dotn knwo why i do this...i guess im doing what u did at the beginning..softening the blow that i dotn want to come..but may. I really love you, and all i want is for u to be happy..no matter with who or doing what (except drugs..the illegal kind). Please..i need you, but i also need you to be happy and totally truthful with me.

Date:	2003-04-28 22:05
Subject:	Yuck...
Security:	Public
Mood:	quixotic
Music:	None

I feel so dead today.....so tired...so out of it.

$51....so sad...

Dad hates me...its common..

Seeing her today felt weird...i juss wanna be alone with her,

Date:	2003-04-19 08:54
Subject:	I couldnt think of anything,...soooo....
Security:	Public
Mood:	enthralled

I LOVE KELLY MARIE HENCKEN!!!

I LOVE HELLY KENCKEN!!!

I LOVE KEL!!!

I LOVE K!!!!

oh, and ur gonna do it first.

Date:	2003-04-13 12:19
Subject:	Long week.
Security:	Public
Mood:	contemplative
Music:	LP

Mi sol, mi luna, mi amor..

El estaba muy amigoso contigo, pero asi esque pasa.

I still feel bad for u and john's friendship..

U look gorgeous on that dress..

U knock me on my feet.

Date:	2003-04-04 18:03
Subject:	5 things i thought of when i got off the phone..
Security:	Public
Mood:	curious
Music:	Don't Stay _ Linkin Park

Kelly must look friecken amazing..she has a dress, hair "did", and make-up....wow...
The future sux, but i know im not breaking up with her....shes gonn ahave to do it.
I swear if Joe decides he's gonna turn straight tonight ill cry.
He prob will once he sees kelly..shit i would.
I love her soo much.

Date:	2003-04-03 07:20
Subject:	I would be content with u being the last girl i kissed.
Security:	Public
Mood:	enthralled
Music:	From the Inside _ Linkin Park

Last night was a vry emotional day for me. I finally blew up inside my head, walkign away from Kelly (which made me feel the worst). I finally told John what i had been hiding from him for 2 weeks, and i know it will make our friendship better, becuase now we can talk and rectify the situation. I guess i juss saw the way Katie and Christina were....but Kelly is so much more trustworthy than they are. John and i talked more tonight than for the last month, and thogh it wasnt all good, im glad it happend.
I got to talk to Alisa, whom i felt replaced by anthony. She said she felt the same way, that cause now i have kelly i didnt need her anymore.....it's great how 2 people can feel the same way on an issue and assume the other does too. LOL. So she fdrove me home and around, i told her of my loe for kelly and she told me of her love with Anthony.
i had to sleep on the couch after a very long fight with mom, but everything is better now, and i still hate dad. Thats sumtin that cant be helped....and he wont give me back my SNES...;(
My relationship with Kelly has ben goign great, and though she doesnt know, her and i feel the same way aboot each other. We're both scared of doin sumtin dumb and losing each other, but if we look at it, we wont. I love her more than i dop anything else, my world revolves around seeing her. When i dotn i become irratible lol. She is my moon my stars my sky...and i hope she will be, even if shes the last girl i ever kiss.

Date:	2003-04-02 22:09
Subject:	Maybe itll pass over, but for awhile ull feel the effects.
Security:	Public
Mood:	sad

I feel like an asshole, i breing truth to that statement by Linkin park.
*The very worst part of you is me*

Maybe i juss wanst good enough.

U told me u love me. God those words were a blessing from an angel...but was i good enough to hear them?

I love you hun.

Date:	2003-03-25 01:43
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	enthralled
Music:	The guys talking.

Hye babe, i guess ur gonna read this while i am in florida.
Your family is important, and what i told u tonight stix.
I love you.
Dont miss me, cause ill be back with more love than when i left, if at all possible.

Date:	2003-03-21 14:55
Subject:	It's due.
Security:	Public
Mood:	accomplished
Music:	Lol..i cant say.

U say things are going good. I think they are goign great. Our relationship IS great, if u really think aboot it. Yeah we fight, but all peopel do, if we didnt id be worried. We've had tough spots but we always talk aboto it to each other and not anyone else. We've been "together' since Jan, but when i knew i really wanted to be with you was on my bday. We have a great relationship, so give us soem credit.

Date:	2003-03-19 14:45
Subject:	Things to say to u.
Security:	Public
Mood:	gloomy
Music:	Buried myself alive - The Used

I do love you.

Ain't no woman, im singing for u.

I hate thinking of the future, for knowing what u think kills me.

I know u like chris, becuase he is what i am not.

jon wasnt that great if he didnt knwo what he had.

U are gorgeous.

Date:	2003-03-15 17:17
Subject:	Wow...
Security:	Public
Mood:	enthralled
Music:	DB

The things u say scare me, cause they are exactly the things i want to hear...

Date:	2003-03-11 22:21
Subject:	Dot com.
Security:	Public
Mood:	calm

. .... ... ...
..... . .... ... ..?
.., . ..... ....

. .... ... ...
..... . .... ... ..?
.., . ..... ....

Date:	2003-03-07 15:10
Subject:	I am such a snugglewhore.
Security:	Public
Mood:	bouncy

I feel like an asshole...

How do u know i love u? I havent even said it.

Working on the inside.

I dotn knwo. i juss dotn know. what is love? explain this to me. U say i love u. but what does it mean to u?

I dotn knwo. i juss dotn know. what is love? explain this to me. U say i love u. but what does it mean to u?

Date:	2003-02-18 18:13
Subject:	...hehe...
Security:	Public
Mood:	amused

you almost always pick the best times
to drop the worst lines
you almost made me cry again this time
another false alarm
red flashing lights
well this time I'm not going to watch myself die
I think I made it a game to play your game
and let myself cry
I buried myself alive on the inside
so I could shut you out
and let you go away for a long time

I guess it's ok I puked the day away
I guess it's better you trapped yourself in your own way
and if you want me back
you're gonna have to ask
nicer than that

I think the chain broke away
and I felt it the day that I had my own time
I took advantage of myself and felt fine
but it was worth the night
I caught an early flight and I made it home

with my foot on your neck
I finally have you
right where I want you

Date:	2003-02-15 16:39
Subject:	U need to update too.
Security:	Public
Mood:	happy

Together.

Curbed.

Bored.

Happy.

Sad.

Anti-derpressing.

Date:	2003-02-10 19:31
Subject:	Je t'aime...mon cherise.
Security:	Public
Mood:	content
Music:	?

Things are so much better when you are happy.

Date:	2003-02-09 14:37
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	contemplative

I speak the truth so why cant you? The world will never know. So be honest already. Not with me....with yourself.