BluJ's Blurty
 
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Below are the 4 most recent journal entries recorded in BluJ's Blurty:

    Saturday, June 18th, 2005
    3:26 am
    Ho-Hum
    Ya see that time there...and still wide awake. I took a hardy nap when I got home. I'm a night owl anyway. My partner isn't and she doesn't understand how I can stay up late and sleep in. She's early to bed, early to rise. I just love to sleep. Each day between 3-6pm, I just wanna lay down and go deep. I think the time of when I was born has something to do with my sleeping preference. I was born at 8:49pm and that's about the time I'm most awake and ready to go!

    Again, I'll say that I miss being single. There's just something missing and I feel like there's no excitement for me. This is the first relationship I've been in with someone older than me. I do tend to venture into younger women because they keep me interested and I get to show them a thing or two. Older women aren't like that. I want to try talking about it with Cindie but an argument will prevail because she doesn't want to hear it and she thinks she's right all the time. It frustrates me to no end.

    Stevanna, at work got me going today. That cutie! Even though she's 20, I'd still have a fling with her. I don't think she's girlfriend material for me but for fun, I wouldn't mind. Does she know I droll over her tight, black slacks she wears and the boots? Haha. Of course, she's very straight but open minded. Even when I told her I miss being single, she giggled as if she knew I was implying it towards her. Which I was. Just too many cute, little blondes coming into the library and I can't flirt!! I'm pathetic, I guess.

    Work went well but ya know, sometimes I can't bring myself to be sweet to everyone. I need a vacation which will be soon.
    Wednesday, June 15th, 2005
    10:19 pm
    Soo tired
    What a day. I'm zapped and really too tired to even write. But it's a release before bedtime. I just wish I could hit the keys right. Just a busy day at work. Well, besides that I got to bed late...real late and because Aunt Flow has come to town. Why must women go through such crap? Is it supposed to make us stronger? We get all the crap. I don't plan to have children so let's just take out the tubes and be done with it. I mean really...

    Co-workers were on my nerves today. Customers even more so. Urgh! Can anyone help themselves anymore? Slavery didn't cease. It's still alive and kickin'. That's what I feel like - a slave. I never saw so many lazy people. I wonder how they cope with their lives. Not that I'm much better but at least I'll do for myself and try things. I just wanna bitch about everything. Ahh, why waste time, I need sleep...and some Advil.

    Current Mood: bitchy
    Tuesday, June 14th, 2005
    10:49 pm
    Darkness
    Whoa! Freaky movie. I love horror flicks and can watch anything but tonight watching this newly purchased, never seen before dvd, I was actually afraid to sit outside on my back patio in the dark. I think I'll rank this up with The Grudge as far as freaky-evilness. I've been trying to work on my Horror dvd collection. I purchased "Demons", a B-rated horror flick I'd watched while in junior high or high school. I thought it was pretty cool back then but I wonder how I'll react watching it now...probably ask myself, "what the hell'd I see in this..." I can only laugh.

    I've been like a major soul-sista lately, ripping and downloading soul music, mainly from the 60s and 70s. I'm proud of the expanse of musical taste I have. I get a kick out of folks at work laughing at what comes in for me...one day it's Led Zeppelin, next it's Aretha Franklin. Really freaks them out when death metal comes in. It's funny how I love music so much but can't figure out how to play an instrument. I long to. It just never happens. I'll just blame it on ADD.

    Sometime, I miss being single. I miss the times where I can wake up at midnight and go dancing. Miss just being to myself or just getting laid. I love Cindie but often wonder how much we actually love one another. Often times we act like "buddies"; I can't remember when the last time we held hands. And with each time I wonder, she's always so sweet to me; like she knows what I'm thinking. It's only been two years and little over but it feels like several years at times. It takes a lot for someone to keep me interested and I question my interest. Maybe I wasn't meant to be "partnered" or in a committed relationship. Considering how I am and my siblings not marrying, it makes me think that it's not in my cards. I don't think everyone on Earth is meant to marry or have children anyhow so it doesn't take me by surprise that I still think this way (even after therapy). Only time will tell...
    11:53 am
    Why do we have to work?
    We all understand that work or employment is something we just have to do. I think we should all get to work part-time while getting paid for full-time, with benefits, of course. We're the hardest working, most stressed country in the world. We actually work too much by what statistics say. I wonder why and who's to blame. Prices are sky high, yes but I wonder what and who put them there. With our stress level being so high, it's no wonder we have such high crime and abuse. We abuse ourselves just to make a buck to support our family. We then have to wait until we're too old to retire and actually enjoy life (so to speak). And to think that Senior citizens get to be stress-free. Those poor folks live from month to month, waiting to see themselves struggling for next month's medications. I'm thinking that by the time folks my age and young retire, there won't be any retirement or assistance. Save now while you can. My grandfather always hid money in certain parts of his house. He didn't trust banks and he didn't trust government agencies. He worked for the post office, even. Now I understand his wisdom. Better late than never, eh? Income is low or high. No comfort zone. Everyone is either over-paid or under-paid. Where is the happy medium? I want to enjoy life NOW, not when I'm too old and decrepid. I blame it all on the government.
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