Leeney's Blurty Entries [entries|friends|calendar]
Leeney

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[21 May 2004|04:17pm]
[ mood | hyper ]
[ music | No Doubt - Excuse me Mr. ]

Well today kinda sucked. It was just one of those off days, ya know? Tonight will be cool though. I'm chillin with Shan, Dan and Tyler. Oh my dear lord i have to pee so bad, hahaha. I need to shower too. I wreak! mmm smelliness, ya I'm smelly. hahaha. I'm wicked fuckin tired too man. heh, it's 4:20. DUDE!!! I just found my CD's I've been lookin for, excuse me for a moment... That's so awesome. haha well I'm gonna go piss then shower, LATER!!!

Faerie Whispers

[20 May 2004|02:16pm]
[ mood | pissed off ]
[ music | Radio ]

I have been thinking about a lot of stuff lately. I've been feeling a lot of things too. Well now i'm pissed cuz the stupid teacher just bitched at me cuz she thinks this is email. Ugh. I just wanna get home, i hate school so much. I'm too aggrivated to type, i'll post later.

Faerie Whispers

BEERS [19 May 2004|10:35am]
[ mood | blah ]
[ music | O.A.R. - About an hour ago ]

I'm so bored. I always get done with my geometry work so early and then I still have over an hour left. Well now there's only about 9 minutes left but yeah. I'm in one of those apathetic kinda moods which kinda sucks. I don't wanna go to my study next period. I hate it. IT'S EVIL!!! lol erg. I'm jammin out to some OAR. Tyler got me hooked, they're so good. lmao beer really does sound funny when you add an "S". BEERS, oh geeze. lol. June 31st I'm goin' to see KoRn which I think I already posted but oh well. I'm not all that excited cuz i've already seen 'em 3 times and I'd really like to go to Ozzfest but since Jessie's new barely jailbait wanted to go we have to go to project revolution instead of Ozzfest. Hopefully I'll find a way to get to Ozzfest, I'll go by myself if I have too. That'd be kinda scary eh? Well I think the period is almost over so I'm out, later.

Faerie Whispers

:) [18 May 2004|10:26pm]
[ mood | happy ]
[ music | Massive Attack - Teardrop ]

I have never been this happy in my life. Have you ever been so happy that you were sad cuz you didn't want it to ever end? I'm kinda scared and confused cuz I don't know what i'm feeling but it's deffinatly all good I'm just scared cuz i don't wanna scare him off and I'm confused cuz I don't know what I'm feeling (all positive, lol). Tonight I started thinking... but there was only one thing well... person on my mind...

Faerie Whispers

[18 May 2004|12:37pm]
[ mood | weird ]
[ music | Sneaker Pimps - Black Sheep ]

I'm so tired. I kept falling asleep today and it sucked really bad. Tyler gave me some no-dose which made me feel a little bit better. I'm happy i get to leave really soon. Tyler is taking Shan, Linz and I home. He's so awesome :) He's my flavorite!!! Ugh, I'm so bored and i can't wait another ten minutes. I'm so antsy. I have no patients(i know that's not the right one but i can't remember how to spell the other one lol) what so ever!!! It's the ADHD. I swear it. I'm so happy I'm gonna go see KoRn for my 4th time on June 31st and then i might be going to ozzfest too. It'll be so kick ass. Ozzfest was sick last year. It was so much fun... all the drunk people and all. heh... it was funny when i was jumping up and down i slipped on a plate that had ketchup on it and fell right on my ass and then i got mad at the plate so i kicked it and got ketchup all over my shoe. good times good times. ugh i still have 7 minutes left lol. I think i'll just leave now and go to my locker or something. Tootles

1 Whisper|Faerie Whispers

Cellar Door [17 May 2004|02:20pm]
[ mood | tired ]
[ music | Sneaker Pimps - Mayday ]

Cellar Door really is a pretty phrase and so is... "go suck a fuck" haha, Donnie Darkko is the greatest movie EVVVER! :) I can't wait to get home (it's 2:22 make a wish). I'm soooo tired. This weekend really tired me out... heh...heh...heh... ooo tommorow i gotta get out of school at 1:05 cuz i'm not doing that damn pep rally thing. The bells gonna ring soon. lmao the teacher aids in the L.C. are talking about their prom and how they were lucky they even got their parents car let a lone a limo or how they had to be home at 11 or how their prom was in the school gym. Well the bell's gonna ring really soon so i'm outta here. Later!

Faerie Whispers

[16 May 2004|10:24pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]
[ music | anything pearl jam ]

Well this weekend was pretty damn cool. Allthough i don't really remember much of it AT ALL!!! lol. Friday i slept over shan's then got ready for prom. Then we had prom last night which was exactly what i expected it to be... nothing. Then i slept over shan's house again last night and people came over and it was a very, very good time. lmao! well i am way too fucking exausted to write anymore... kinda sad eh? welll i am going to go eat (maybe) and then maybe talk to Tyler if he gets online soon enough and then PASS OUT!!! lol well... tootles

Faerie Whispers

Thank you... [14 May 2004|01:59pm]
[ mood | grateful ]
[ music | Pearl Jam - Yellow Leadbetter (or something like that) ]

The last few days have been kinda meh. I've realized that 'm not the best person I could be. People make mistakes, shit happens. How are you supposed to live life without mistakes? If you care about someone enough and you get in the worst fight in your life I still belive that things will eventually be fine. I'm one of those fate people but I belive that you choose your fate. Fate is only planned on your actions and what you want it to be. I love my friends and I'm so thankful that they're willing to put up with my shit. I learn from my mistakes and I try to fix my wrongs. "what's done is done" this is quoted from one of the most influential people in my life. I strongly belive in it. What's done is done, you can't change the past but you have the future to make whatever you want out of it. I know he didn't come up with it but he's the one that told me that. He helped me realize a lot of things as well as Shan. Shan and Tim are deffinatly the two people in my life so far that have really helped me out and have made me realize so much about myself. I was thinking... just now... I can't wait to be old. I mean it will suck in more ways than it'll be good but if i'm realizing so much now, just imagine how much I'll know by the time I'm 50. I have so much life to live and it's just beginning. I'm going to experience so much in life, horrible and wonderful. Sorry if i'm babling but i'm just in one of those "open your eyes" kinda moods. In the learning center, heh. Now I gotta thank some people...

Shannon - Thank you so much for being my absolute best friend. Thank you for dealing with all my stupid shit. You are such an awesome person. You deserve the best of the best and I want to make sure you know that. I hope we will stay friends 'till we're on our death beds, but of course then we'll still have enough energy to steal the cruiser. I love you so much my hetero-girlfriend lmao. Thanx for making me laugh, cry and so many other things.

Tim - Even though you won't be reading this I'll just pretend like you will. You made me realize so much about myself. You showed me so many things that I would have never figured out on my own. You helped me out with one of the roughest times in my life thus far. Thank you so much.

Lindsay - We have been friend for what? A year and a half? I'm bad with that kinda stuff. In the time that we have been friends you have been awesome. You have deffinatly slapped me across the face a few times (not litteraly, although it's possible, lol) You have put up with a lot of my shit as well. Having you as my neighbor has deffinatly been a plus. Having someone there to enjoy those summer nights with rocks. Thank you so much for helping me.

Tyler - Although It's only been a little while since we first even started talking you have helped me out a lot. You have made me appreciate life and the beauty that surrounds it. If I'm having a crappy day your always there to put a smile on my face. If I need to talk or figure something out I know your there to help. Thank you.

To everyone - THANK YOU ALL!!! I want everyone to know that I do listen... most the time... lol. I love you guys and if you need anything at all... I'm here.

1 Whisper|Faerie Whispers

[11 May 2004|10:47pm]
[ mood | tired ]
[ music | Ozzy - I just want you ]

Today was awesome. School sucked... of course. But after school... heh...

Tyler brought Shan and I home so Shan and I walked around for a bit. Then Stefan came over and we hung for a bit. About 4 something Tyler called and was like "yo, i'm stoppin by, wut" heh, just not so white. Well anyway, Tyler came over and we were chillin until Tyler got the wonderful idea to go swimming. Actually it was a really good idea untill I actually got in the pool... Fucking Freezing! Well then we got in the jacuzzi which was quite nice. Stefan then got the crazy idea to play DDR so we did. Then we watched Dazed and Confused... awesome movie. After that we brought Shibbs home. Then... we hit up Wendy's. Sooo good. After we got our Wendy's Tyler was kind enough to bring me home where we hung for a bit I use a lot of Well's, Then's and After's. heh... oh well.

I realized something today... I laugh to myself a lot. Most of the time it's Tyler's fault, cuz i'll think of something that involves him and then i'll start giggling or something. Or i'll think about something Shan and I talked about and i'll start laughing. And then i look around and i feel like a fool so then i keep laughing and it's like a chain reaction. I am so god damned tired.

I don't ask much, I just want you.

1 Whisper|Faerie Whispers

[11 May 2004|01:59pm]
[ mood | discontent ]
[ music | Prev.~Shinedown-Simple Man Now~Zombie-more human than human ]

Well i'm at school in the learning center for cool kids! Walking rocked... we didn't have to walk. heh. Well i am officially excited for prom. Well... after prom. After prom Tyler and someone else, hopefully Dave will be spending the night at Shan's. I am so excited! AHHH!!! I'm listening to the radio and one of my all time fave songs came on... Simple Man by Shinedown (really by Lynard Skynard) I Love this song sooo much (but not more than Tyler of course, lol) Ugh, there's still like half an hour of class left and i'm so bored. I have stuff do to though so it won't be too bad. I just finished my english that was due a few days ago but i figured i'd do it anyway incase we have a test on it or something. I love this song, lol. The drummer of Shinedown is marrying the lead singer of Lynard Skynards daughter, lol. He probably gets points for being a son-in-law. I just figured i'd mention that. I just realized that i know a shit load of useless and random information that i share frequently. Oh well. It's so nice outside. I'm going home and putting on shorts. Then buying my corsage! woot! Oh no! the songs over! SKYSHOW!!! May 30th i gotta find out the details but it's in manch and i'm mostly sure it's free!!!

1 Whisper|Faerie Whispers

I'm not as ugly sad as you... [10 May 2004|06:33pm]
[ mood | crazy ]
[ music | Eve6 - Inside Out ]

Well today I went to school. What the fuck else is knew? heh... (3... only 3, Shan you know what I'm talking about, lmao) Tyler brought me home from school and we had to stop at Bailey's so he could get an estimate on his bumper. Then we went to my house and he came over for a little bit and we watched Ed, Edd and Eddy and then we watched Rocco's Modern Life. I dunno if that was the order but does that really matter? He then left and I hung out with Linz for a while. Around 4:30-5ish the 2 of us went to CVS and I picked up my meds and 10 gallons of water. lol, good times, good times. Now I'm home, pondering wether or not I should do my homework. Homework is so stupid. School and home are 2 different things. School should not be brought home!!! People do have other things to do like work or sit on their lazy ass mesmorized by the computer all night. Ugh, prom is this saturday. I don't even really care about the actual prom, I just can't wait to hang out with Tyler, Dave and Shan afterwards! hehe, it'll be boat loads of fun! I still have to buy my corsage... eh... this does kinda suck, I have to buy MY OWN corsage. Oh well... just as long as I get to wear pretty flowers!!! (3) I just got an idea! I'll get a purple rose for my corsage, mmm purple roses... my flavorite!!! Well, I'm going to go possibly do homework, but right now food sounds better. Tootles

1 Whisper|Faerie Whispers

[09 May 2004|11:32pm]
[ mood | sleepy ]
[ music | dunno ]

Well today was fairly uneventful. Went to church, went to grandparents house (i ate sooo much) came home, talked to Shan, talked to Tyler. That's about it. I'm so excited... Tyler said he'll teach me a bunch of stuff about computers. He's seriously like a genius when it comes to that sutff... it's soo cool! I love it! hehe. I"m so wired i got a large french vanilla iced coffee extra extra tonight. I drank half and i saved the other half for the mornin'. I'm so smart.

Shan's and I's convo:
SvveetNobody: i just poked myself in the eye
A7X118: how'd u manage that? r u ok?
SvveetNobody: but not on purpose
SvveetNobody: lol yeah
A7X118: lol
SvveetNobody: well you see!... i was trying to scratch the corner of my eye, but i missed horribly

Faerie Whispers

[09 May 2004|11:32pm]
[ mood | sleepy ]
[ music | dunno ]

Well today was fairly uneventful. Went to church, went to grandparents house (i ate sooo much) came home, talked to Shan, talked to Tyler. That's about it. I'm so excited... Tyler said he'll teach me a bunch of stuff about computers. He's seriously like a genius when it comes to that sutff... it's soo cool! I love it! hehe. I"m so wired i got a large french vanilla iced coffee extra extra tonight. I drank half and i saved the other half for the mornin'. I'm so smart.

Shan's and I's convo:
SvveetNobody: i just poked myself in the eye
A7X118: how'd u manage that? r u ok?
SvveetNobody: but not on purpose
SvveetNobody: lol yeah
A7X118: lol
SvveetNobody: well you see!... i was trying to scratch the corner of my eye, but i missed horribly

Faerie Whispers

[08 May 2004|09:33pm]
[ mood | infuriated ]
[ music | Outkast - Roses ]

Well I am extremely pissed off right now. Stefan and Shan dropped me off at 8 and they stayed for about an hour. When they leave my dad comes up to me and says "you don't have the car 'till saturday". I was like "what? why?!" and he says "remember how I told you before on the phone... I said that you came home nobody would be over and you'd be in for the night". It's fucking bullshit. Then I stomped upstairs and then ran back downstairs and said "if you don't want people here you tell them to leave". Then I went back upstairs as he's talking and I was completely ignoring him and I just said "fuck you" when I got to the top of the stairs... I made sure he heard it. My family is fucked. Both of my parents are unemployed and guess what!!! the government just stopped giving us money!!! Ugh, shit just sucks... and there's a crap load more stuff that is goin on. I'm so stressed right now... err

2 Whispers|Faerie Whispers

[08 May 2004|02:47pm]
[ mood | confused ]
[ music | Billy Idol - White Wedding ]

Yesterday sucked hardcore. The end of 2nd period I freaked out so right before 3rd I grabbed Shan and we skipped and went to the cafe with Tyler. Tyler helped me out so much even if he didn't know it. He just made me feel so much better. Then when we were in the cafe Shan had a talk with Meg and just all this shit went down and people suck. Then after school Tyler brought Shan and I to my house and he stayed with us for a while but then he had to go to work. Around 8 o'clock my dad brought us to her house cuz I can't drive this week cuz I got in trouble. Then around 9:45 Stefan stopped by and left right away. Around 10 Tyler came by and we hung out for about an hour. That made me feel even better cuz last night kinda sucked as well. Well i'm gonna go, adieu

Faerie Whispers

[06 May 2004|10:04pm]
[ mood | calm ]
[ music | Soil - Redefine ]

FIRST SIGHT
Turns me around again
Brings me face to face with my sin
I've got it, always had it
A reason to look within now
TAKE FLIGHT
To your sun again
Burns the sin straight from my hands
I've got it, always had it
A reason to live within now
Every time I fall
You catch me
And every time I lose control
You help me, you save me
And every time I lose myself
You find me, redefine me
MY GOD
How stained my hands have been
Makes me sick from inside out again
I've got it, always had it
A reason to look within now
STAND CLOSE
To my side again
Never stuck a knife in my back, friend
I've got it, always had it
A reason to live within now
Somebody to make me feel whole again
(better)
Somebody to make me want to love again
(my life gets better)
Somebody to make me see the sun again
(my life gets better)
Somebody to hold me, hold me
Until this life feels better
Every time I fall
And every time I lose control
You help me, you save me
And every time I lose myself
You find me, redefine me
And every time I hate myself
You love me, forgive me
And every time I lose myself
You find me, redefine me

Faerie Whispers

[06 May 2004|02:10pm]
[ mood | mischievous ]
[ music | whatever that kid is listening to (it's loud) ]

I'm in school and i'm so bored. I got here this morning and i was like "no i can't be here". I was trying to find everyway i could to skip but then i couldn't find a ride or anything so i was like fuck it. I just walked around w/ Daniele(sp) and we went to the computer class right next to Tylers. So i stood outside the class for like 2 minutes and he never turned around but that's ok. I get to see him in about 15 minutes. He said he'd give me a ride home. He's my flavorite! hehe. This morning i didn't get to take a shower, i feel icky but oh well! Today has been so long, i can't stand block days at all. Daniele gave me these ball things that are like breath mints. They're wicked strong but really good. I wanna buy me some. I need a butt so bad! Ahg, i'm so glad tommorow is friday. I have wicked bad ADHD today cuz i forgot to take my meds. This is NO GOOD! My hands smell like playdough cuz in french Jen and I were playing with it. It was good fun. We got to watch pirates of the carribean as well. I wanna listen to techno or trip-hop. The kid next to me is listening to something of that nature and it makes me wanna dance!!!! lmfao. WELL....... i'm gonna go be bored for a while so later fuckers! :p

Faerie Whispers

[05 May 2004|10:53pm]
[ mood | happy ]
[ music | The Cure - Love Song ]

Well i just had an awesome night. Tyler and I went to the mall to buy our mommies presents. Then we came back to my house to watch queen of the damned. All I can think about is him. Well i'm going to bed, g'night.

Faerie Whispers

[05 May 2004|04:43pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]
[ music | Rush - Tom Sawyer ]

Yesterday I emailed my parents and in my email i wrote:

Dear Mom and Dad,
I wanted to email you guys to tell you that i really do love you 2. It
may not seem like I do. It may seem that i wanna bite your head off
constantly but that's only because i'm 16. I'm sorry for all the things i
do to bother you guys. You guys have been through a lot and i know i
probably don't really help too much. I know i stress you out or just get on
your nerves but you guys also do it too. It's sort of a mutual thing. Like i told mom earlier, it would really help
if you guys could see things from my perspective and i wish i could see
things from your perspective and i know we all try to but it can't really
happen the way we like. You two created me and i really can't thank you
enough because if i wasn't alive i wouldn't be able to experience all the
wonderful things i have and will experience. Whenever i bother you guys to
let me go out or to do things i just want you to know that i'm trying my
hardest to live my life. You only get 1 and you have to make the best of
it. I have never really been able to do things on my own. I have always
needed you guys. This will change very soon. To tell you the truth i'm
scared but extremely excited because it'll be a new point in my life and
i've grown to love change. I'm growing up and doing it fast. I'll always
need you guys though. I love you guys so much and i just wanted you to know
that.

Love always,
Aylene

I just came to realize things yesterday and i really felt like that needed to be said. It's all true too. I may really hate them sometimes but if it weren't for them I wouldn't have the time of my life doing to stupidest shit with Shan or Linz or I wouldn't have been able to find someone that i care so much about. (that would be Tyler for u slow people, lol) They pay for my food, my clothes (sometimes), my stay, my insurance, the least i can do is help out.

Well my dad replied and his words really ment a lot to me. He is an extremely talented writer. He told me how he understands and how they are slowly realizing that i'm getting older. I actually cried. It really is amazing how much i am starting to realize things. Life is awesome, it may seem pointless at times but then again if life didn't exist it wouldn't be there to be pointless. I hope that made sense.

As of right now all i want to do is grab Tyler, grab a blanket and go find a field to just lay there and look at the stars.

Faerie Whispers

[04 May 2004|08:26pm]
[ mood | aggravated ]
[ music | Hot Hot Heat - Bandages ]

Well i just posted this whole long fucking thing but it got fucked up or something so i'm too lazy to retype it, maybe i'll post later.

Faerie Whispers

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