| Older? Wiser? Sassier! |
[18 Oct 2007|09:04am] |
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"Ready To Go" Republica |
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Maybe age has something to do with it.
When I was younger & 108 lbs. I still never felt like it was enough. Now I am the heaviest I've ever been(preggers with twins) & I swear I've never looked better. I think I am just happy & comfortable in my own skin. There is something about being confident. It gives you the boost that no size on a clothing tag or number on a scale can give. It is just about knowing who you are, what you believe in & making the choice for yourself that you are fabulous & worthy. I wish I would have understood this at 18 & not wasted so much time beating the hell out of myself and demanding perfection.
The worst thing a person with an ED can imagine is being fat & guess what - I have two little people in me - my belly is big. It didn't make me less fun, less pretty, or less vibrant. My size hasn't changed who I am. All of that stuff is in my head. Now of course I want to wear my pre-pregnancy size 4's again - like, tomorrow. But I realize that this whole body obsession thing is just a way to be mean to myself. If you don't embrace who you are the external becomes everything, because the inside is void.
I still want to be thin & healthy, but let me add happy to that as well. I want to love life & live it to it's fullest & I can only do that by enjoying being me.
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