| :: Angels In The Mirror :: |
[29 Sep 2003|12:14am] |
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Judith - Perfect Circle |
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I won't ever speak of him again. Don't come to me and ask if I am alright. Don't ask me if I am broken and beaten. Nothing can hurt me now.
I am immune because I am numb.
And I want to convince myself that I never knew him. That we never existed. That I never believed.
That I never second glanced.
I want to pretend that I never understood.
Take this as you would if it were a suicide note. Don't question it. Let it be as it is.
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| :: Uh - Huh And More Along The Way :: |
[29 Sep 2003|12:33am] |
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All Of This Past - Sarah Bettens |
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I'm begging the one who broke down with me in paradise to come give me the keys. Don't want to wake up here. It isn't the right place to be. Took all the strength I had and bled it through my hands. I watched it pour and still didn't realize. I'm so naive sometimes.
Hopefully one day you'll see how your God abandoned you. Sorry for the truth. You'd give gold for another chance at rolling your dice. Don't question me on why. Now, get on your knees and beg to return to paradise.
Thank to you to the disbeliever who held out his hand in hopes of change. He doesn't see it in your eyes. You're a malice type of sin. And I begin to inch my way into your skin.
Hopefully one day you'll see how your God abandoned you. Sorry for the truth. You'd give gold for another chance at rolling your dice. Don't question me on why. Now, get on your knees and beg to return to paradise.
I'm never going to choose to be the one to disown you first. You've already left your things. And I miss nothing you used to bleed upon. Now wash the keys and find the door.
You've waited much too long.
Paradise waits on the other side. But what will you see when you finally get inside?
Copyright.
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| :: "Indian Giver" Is What She Called Me :: |
[29 Sep 2003|12:45am] |
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Awakening - The Damning Well |
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It never hit me until now. The emptiness. I've gone weeks without so much of a thought. Now I am alone again. Watching the world outside my window. Pieces of you are flying by. My hand is reaching out this window still. Wanting to touch you as we both know it's impossible. (to catch the impossible you must be impossible) I'll make it alright. I'll make it okay. Just trust me. I'll make it tolerable for your pretty eyes to see.
I want to be spiteful. Spit in your face. But instead I am broken and I want to give you my heart back. No returns after I'm worn. Where am I to go without exchanges?
Watch me paint the sky a beautiful gold. I don't want my secrets to be told. So tie them up around your neck. Jump from the bridge. I'll be the wings to give you such flight. And you'll wonder where we'll end up next and where we might be. I promise my life if tonight you'll just hold me.
Damn little child. You have to feel remorse. Tired of feeling like I'm programmed. Comfort in the difficult things that are a rarity. Watch me bleed upon this page. You may just find it humorous. Laugh, I don't mind. I'll be a string and you be my puppeteer. I'll make you smile. I'll make you grin. But most of all, I will act out all your greatest fears.
I want to be spiteful. Spit in your face. But instead I am broken and I want to give you my heart back. No returns after I'm worn. Where am I to go without exchanges?
Alone in the waking. Shadows upon the wall. I'm helplessly searching for something to grasp onto. There is nothing. We are nothing. Suddenly endless with numerous accounts of blood stains on the wall. I see how vile the world can be when I am trapped behind the hour glass. Time running out quickly. There is no need to stop. I won't bite my tongue. Thoughts are free. And now trapped under your feet.
I want to be spiteful. Spit in your face. But instead I am broken and I want to give you my heart back. No returns after I'm worn. Where am I to go without exchanges?
Copyright.
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| :: The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot :: |
[29 Sep 2003|12:56am] |
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The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot - Brand New |
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If it makes you less sad, I will die by your hand. I hope you find out what you want. I already know what I am. And if it makes you less sad, we'll start talking again. And you can tell me how vile I already know that I am. I'll grow old and start acting my age. I'll be a brand new day in a life that you hate. A crown of gold. A heart that's harder than stone. And it hurts a whole lot, but it's missed when it's gone.
Call me a safe bet. I'm betting I'm not. I'm glad that you can forgive. I'm only hoping as time goes, you can forget.
If it makes you less sad, I'll move out of the state. You can keep to yourself. I'll keep out of your way. And if it makes you less sad, I'll take your pictures all down. Every picture you paint, I will paint myself out. It's cold as a tomb, and it's dark in your room, when I sneak to your bed to pour salt in your wounds. So call it quits or get a grip. Say you wanted a solution. You just wanted to be missed.
Call me a safe bet. I'm betting I'm not. I'm glad that you can forgive. I'm only hoping as time goes, you can forget.
You are calm and reposed. Let your beauty unfold. Pale white, like the skin stretched over your bones. Spring keeps you ever close. You are second hand smoke. You are so fragile and thin. Standing trial for your sins. Holding onto yourself the best you can. You are the smell before rain. You are the blood in my veins.
Call me a safe bet. I'm betting I'm not. I'm glad that you can forgive. I'm only hoping as time goes, you can forget.
Brand New
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| :: When You See Me, Don't Laugh :: |
[29 Sep 2003|09:07am] |
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awake |
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The Red - Chevelle |
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I am a weak creature. I can't let them go. I have to have their words fill my head. I long for my companions. And yet I shove them away.
I need a breath to let me know I am real. I need a touch to let me know I can still feel. I am so afraid I've become so numb I'm not real anymore.
Like pretty pictures I am tattered. I wish to be free. Thrown into the wind. But no one is grabbing me as the pieces fall and blend in with the flowers below.
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| :: Time To Take A Scar And Split It New :: |
[29 Sep 2003|09:25am] |
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REV 22:20 - Puscifer |
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He wants to talk of demons. He wants to speak of angels. And I have no strength for it.
I don't want to talk of it. I don't want you to know that I see things. I don't want you to know I am still bleeding.
I've got bandages. But why are they leaking?
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| :: Judith :: |
[29 Sep 2003|09:31am] |
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Judith - Perfect Circle |
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You're such an inspiration for ways
That i will never ever choose to be.
Oh so many ways for me to show you
How your savior has abandoned you.
Thank(fuck) your god.
Your lord, your christ
He did this,
Took all you had
And left you this way.
Still you pray, never stray,
Never taste of the fruit.
Never thought to question why.
It's not like you killed someone.
It's not like you drove a hateful spear into his side.
Praise the one who left you
Broken down and paralyzed.
He did it all for you.
He did it all for you.
Oh so many ways for me to show you
How your dogma has abandoned you.
Pray to your christ, to your god.
Never taste of the fruit,
Never stray, never break,
Never choke on a lie,
Even though he's the one who did this to you
Never thought to question why.
It's not like you killed someone.
It's not like you drove a spiteful spear into his side.
Talk to jesus christ as if he knows the reasons why
He did this all to you.
He did it all for you.
He did it all for you.
Perfect Circle
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| :: Sometimes It's Harder To Breathe Like This :: |
[29 Sep 2003|01:25pm] |
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Trucks on the highway outside. |
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Sometimes. Just sometimes. It's harder to breathe without the water. Without the drowning I am so used to.
I watch my family inch their lives away piece by piece. I try so hard to tell them that it isn't worth it. I get nothing in return.
Forsaken last child. "You are melting butter on the bread and no one cares."
Watch me laugh at that. And then cry alone in my bedroom.
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