5:47PM - today
Current mood: 
bored
boredAnd once again
I am playing the game
This self-deceit lullaby
And I should know better
Not to waste my time
Always the outsider
Waiting by the gates
Don’t want to grow up
And scared to let go
I long for company
Black birds flying low
I claimed the omens
My visions coming true
This place and these faces
I watched it all before
The tense muscles on my back
I know what you thinking
I know your next move
And why you need an enemy
I keep playing the game
Tongues of Serpents
Temperance and courtesy
Again and again
But who is stronger?
Who will win this battle?
That summer feeling, the fresh breeze
Brings memories of a happy time
When I was innocent
Blind to the degrading society
Facing the elements
Being one with nature
The Goddess’s Call
Empowering my soul
Bad feeling are forgotten
I don’t feel alone any longer
The sunshine kissing my skin
And birds spreading joy
This is a crazy blog entry but I need to express some complex feelings
1st
The One Who Ran Away:
I know now I’m the one to blame and I am sorry. I caused that situation to happen by being immature.
I actually miss you complaining all the time and being a drama queen.
I won’t border you anymore.
2nd
The Role Model Wannabe:
Serious? Do you really see yourself like that? I don’t think I ever meet anyone with more issues than you. Thanks for pretending that you care, but you sympathy offends me.
3rd
The Trouble-Maker Parasite:
I’m glad I’m no longer one of your victims. But I been informed that you still talk about me at every opportunity. At least have the guts to tell me things to my face. And I’m glad everyone else is seeing your true colours. Although I do have to admit you were right about some things.
4th
This Is My Anger
This Is My Fear
I put myself in those situations.
I lost touch with reality, now I’m crashing down.
It hurts, but I feel Alive.
5th
The One I Love:
You were right my love. About many things.
You are my rock, without you I’m nothing.
Thanks for always helping me see the truth.
And finally
6th
My Myspace Friends:
Thanks for keeping me company when I’m lonely. 
angryANSER ALL QUESTIONS BEFORE LOOKING AT THE ANSWER AT THE BOTTOM
1.
What is a four-letter word that ends in 'k' and means the same as intercourse?
2.
What is it that a cow has four of and a woman has only two of?
3.
What can you find in a man's pants that is about six inches long, has a head on it, and that women love so much that they often blow it?
4.
What word starts with 'f ' and ends with 'u-c-k'?
5.
Name five words that are each four letters long, end in ' u-n-t ' and one of which is a word for a woman?
6.
What does a dog do that you can step into?
7.
What four-letter word begins with 'f' and ends with' k', and if you can't get one you can use your hands?
8.
What is hard, six inches long, has two nuts, and can make a girl fat?
9.
What four-letter word ends in 'it ' and is found on the bottom of birdcages?
10.
What is it that all men have one of; it's longer on some men than on others; the Pope doesn't use his; and a man gives it to his wife after they're married?
Answers:
1.
talk
2.
legs
3.
a £20 note
4.
firetruck
5.
bunt, hunt, runt, punt, aunt
6.
pants
7.
fork
8.
Almond Joy candy bar
9.
grit
10.
surname
A FRIEND HAD POSTED THIS BULLETIN GAVE ME A LOT TO THINK ABOUT SO PLEASE READ
Please pass it along and share it with your children.
A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:
1) The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun, braid or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed . They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair . Women with short hair are not common targets.
2) The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who's clothing is easy to remove quickly . Many of them carry scissors around specifically to cut clothing.
3) They also look for women on their cell phone ,searching through their purse, or doing other activities while walking because they are off-guard and can be easily overpowered.
4) Men are most likely to attack & rape in the early morning, between 5: 00a.m. and 8:30a.m.
5) The number one place women are abducted from/attacked is grocery store parking lots . Number two: is office parking lots/garages. Number three: is public restrooms.
6) The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to another location where they don't have to worry about getting caught.
7) Only 2% said they carried weapons because rape carries a 3-5 year sentence but rape with a weapon is 15-20 years.
8) If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn't worth it because it will be time-consuming.
9) These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas , or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.
Key s are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you're not worth it.
10) Several defense mechanisms he taught us are: If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question , like what time is it, or make general small talk: 'I can't believe it is so cold out here,' 'we're in for a bad winter.' Now you've seen their face and could identify them in a line-up; you lose appeal as a target.
11) If someone is coming toward you , hold out your hands in front of you and yell STOP or STAY BACK ! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they'd leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back . Again, they are looking for an EASY target.
12) If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes) , yell, I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.
13) If someone grabs you , you can't beat them with strength but you can by outsmarting them If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm (between the elbow and armpit) OR in the upper inner thigh VERY VERY HARD . One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands - the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it - it hurts.
14) After the initial hit, always GO for the GROIN . I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy's parts it is extremely painful . You might think that you'll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble and he's out of there.
15) When the guy puts his hands up to you , grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible w ith as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.
16) Of course the things we always hear still apply.
Alw ays be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don't dismiss it, go with your instincts!!!
You may feel a little silly at the time, but you'd feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.
1 . Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body.
If you are close enough to use it, do!
2. Learned this from a tourist guide in New Orleans . If a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM . Toss it away from you....chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you, and he will go for the wallet/purse.
RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!
3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car, kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won't see you, but everybody else will. This has saved lives.
4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc.) DON'T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU GET INTO YOUR CAR, LOCK THE DOORS AND LEAVE.
a. If someone is in the car with a gun to your head DO NOT DRIVE OFF, repeat: DO NOT DRIVE OFF! Instead gun the engine and speed into anything, wrecking the car. Your Air Bag will save you. If the person is in the back seat they will get the worst of it. As soon as the car crashes bail out and run. It is better than having them find your body in a remote location.
5 .
A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot or parking garage:
A.) Be aware: look around you, look into your car, at the passenger side floor, and in the back seat.
B.) If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.
C.) Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out.
I T IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.
)
6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot.
This is especially true at NIGHT!)
7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times. And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ.
RUN, preferably in a zigzag pattern!
8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP! It may get you raped or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well-educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked 'for help' into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.
9. Another Safety Point: Someone just told me that her friend heard a crying baby on her porch the night before last, and she called the police because it was late and she thought it was weird. The police told her 'Whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.
'
The lady then said that it sounded like the baby had crawled near a window, and she was worried that it would crawl to the street and get run over. The policeman said, 'We already have a unit on the way, whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.' He told her that they think a serial killer has a baby's cry recorded and uses it to coax women out of their homes thinking that someone dropped off a baby. He said they have not verified it , but have had several calls by women saying that they hear baby's cries outside their doors when they're home alone at night.
Please pass this on and DO NOT open the door for a crying baby ----This should be taken seriously because the Crying Baby theory was mentioned on America's Most Wanted this past Saturday when they profiled the serial killer in Louisiana .
I'd like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a life. A candle is not dimmed by lighting another candle. I was going to send this to the ladies only, but guys, if you love your mothers, wives, sisters, daughters, etc., you may want to pass it onto them, as well.
Psychoanalyze Yourself; Don't read ahead, just copy and paste the following into a NEW bulletin BEFORE you read my answers. Then answer the following questions one at a time WITHOUT LOOKING AHEAD with the first thought that comes to mind. Then read what each answer means at the end.
1. You are walking in the woods. You are not alone. Who's with you?
John
2. You are walking in the woods. You see an animal. What kind of animal?
bird
3. What interaction takes place between you and the animal?
I watched it flying away
4. You walk deeper in the woods. You enter a clearing, and before you is your
dream house, how big is it?
not to big, but enough room for guess room and a studio for john. A big garden and kitchen too
5. Is your dream house surrounded by a fence?
no. surrounded by trees and a hedge
6. You enter the house. You walk into the dining room and see the dining room table covered with?
fruit and chocolate
7. You exit the house and a cup is on the ground, what kind is it?
johns cup
8. What do you do with the cup?
leave it
9. You walk to the edge of the property where you find yourself standing at a body of water what kind of water is it?
a clear river
10. How do you cross that body of water?
swim
________________________________________
The ANSWERS
1. The person who you are walking in the woods with is the most important to you.
2. The size of the animal is representative of your perception of the size of your problems in your life.
3. The severity of the interaction you have with the animal is representative of how you deal with your problems.
4. The size of your dream home is representative of the size of your ambition.
5. A lack of a fence is indicative of an open personality. People are welcome at all times. The presence of a fence indicates a closed personality. You'd prefer people not drop by unannounced.
6. If your answer did NOT include food, flowers, or people, then you are generally unhappy.
7. The durability of the material with the cup is representative of the perceived durability of your relationship.
8. What you did with the cup is representative of your attitude.
9. The size of the body of water is representative of the size of your relationships.
10. The way you cross the water is representative to how easy or hard you expect your life to be.
"There was only one catch and that was Catch-22, which specified that concern for one's own safety in the face of dangers that were real and immediate was the process of a rational mind. Orr was crazy and could be grounded. All he had to do was ask; and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions. Orr would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if he didn't, but if he was sane he had to fly them. If he flew them he was crazy and didn't have to; but if he didn't want to he was sane and had to."
MORNING SEX
She was in the kitchen preparing to boil eggs for breakfast.
He walked in; She turned and said,
You've got to make love to me this very moment.'
His eyes lit up and he thought,
'This is my lucky day.'
Not wanting to lose the moment, he embraced her
And then gave it his all;
Right there on the kitchen table.
Afterwards she said,
'Thanks,'
And returned to the stove.
More than a little puzzled, he asked,
'What was that all about?'
She explained,
'The egg timer's broken.'
got a new camera that have a really good macro setting
and had lots of cool pics from gigs, HIM, Cradle of Filth and Dimmu Borgir on my old phone. put the phone is crap and I couldnt download the pix
so I photographed them
mr valo (I think it was in 2005
cradle
dimmu
Quiz: How Sensitive Are You?
You answered 10 items out of 10 Yes.
Your score is 100%. You are a natural born empath.
CANT LOGIN ON MYSPACE
PUT MY EMAIL AND PASSWORD AND IT TAKES ME BACK TO THE FRONT PAGE TO PUT THE EMAIL AND PASSWORD AGAIN
AND ON MY PAGE SAYS IM ONLINE
ANYONE HAVING PROBLEMS TOO?
annoyedhttp://www.spice.co.uk/joanna_dark?product_type_id=8&category_id=0#
http://www.spice.co.uk/joanna_dark_1?product_type_id=6&category_id=0
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