ok, finaly i went to LJ, everyone is right..its WAY BETTER..ive jsut gotta figure out how to set everything up over there..anyone wanna help? ok well the username for LJ is
Do you like to shower, or take a bath?: I like to do both, usually i take a bath, and shower afterwads to rinse off
Do you use shower/bath gel or just regular soap?: regular soap
When at a friend/stranger's house, do you sometimes feel weird about going to the bathroom?: yes, but not at a good friends house..ill shit
Poop is funny, right?: yea, and then when it has corn in it its hillarious
Do you find yourself peeing a lot?: all the time
Do you shave?: yeah
How long does it take you to shower?: a long time, longer if im going out
Conditioner? Or just Shampoo?: both, Victorias Secret
Have you ever had sex?: yes
If yes, what was it like? Did your first time hurt?: casual, and yes, it hurt
Do you find yourself being sexually frustrated more than once a week? eh, ive got a vibrator
Do you have fantasies often?: yes
Someone famous you'd want to have sex with/make out with?: cant think right now..
Ever dream of your wedding?honeymoon?: ofcourse I do
What would be the ultimate fantasy place to have sex?: im all set in my bed, or *his* bed
Have you ever been caught having sex?: yes, actually i was having a threesome, when someone saw it through the window..
Do your friends find you weird sometimes?: all of the time
Do you ever/have you ever laughed for no reason at all for a long time?: yea, it happens daily
Do you like the color purple?: im all set
Do you think you have any influence on others?: I guess I do
Would you ever hump a tree at night while hanging out with your friends. . just to make them laugh? why not, ive done eumber things (( lol mare, what about going in 7eleven with helmets on just to buy slimjims? ))
Person you felt most comfortable with/talking to?: mary -erin- david - mori
Person you'd have a sleepover with?: um all my friends
Person you'd fight a rabid dog for?: mar-erin-dave-robin-actually, probably any of my friends for that matter..
Favorite color?: blue
Favorite Tv Show?: growing up gotti
Favorite Show as a kid?: Full House
Favorite place?: beach, my house, davids mothers, mary's, the club
Favorite present you gave someone?: I don’t know
Favorite pet?: onyx, steves dog
You had pogs?: god yeah, i had tons..i might still have them somewhere
You had to have a boyfriend in 6th grade?: yes, i think mine was denny peterson, but me and melissa both liked shane strickland
You had an accident.. and you weren't 3 years old?: yea, probably while laughing hysterically with melissa
You tripped infront of someone?: i do it daily..
Have you ever...
Laughed so hard food came out of your mouth/nose?: yea
Cried so hard you threw up?: yes
Eaten liver?: nope
Had Buttermilk?: yum
Kissed the same sex?: yes
Mooned someone/a school bus/a county jail?: yeph
Farted loud and people heard?: yup
Burped louder than a guy?: daily, ((erin))
Been on a cheerleading team?: yes :)
Played spin the bottle?: yes lol those were the days
Eated Chicken Pot pie?: only my mommys
Spent a holiday alone?: nope
So do you like anyone?: yes
Do they live near you?: ehh i guess you can say that
Have you ever been in love before?: yep, still am
Age ain't nothin but a number?: depends..
Do you believe in 'internet' relationships?: nope
Do you believe in the pyschos the news always talk about.. being on the net, trying to kill people?: yeah
Do you believe in 'waiting for what you want'?: yea
Do you believe in love at first site? yes
Do you believe in "everything happens for a reason.. It happens whether you want it to or not"?: i have to say, i am a strong believer in this one..
ok so after all that BS with mary n dennis, i realised she DID call me, and my brother had just turned my ringer off cuz i was asleep! so sorry mar for being grumpy, i guess we just misunderstood eachother!
the rest of the weekend was good, but on sunday i couldnt get my damn car started! i guess some cable was dissconnected, so iwent to see my father last minute..and it took all damn day because he was too busy getting high to finish my car, buti finally got my exhaust fixed :) THEN, i went and saw dave, and that went well..me and steve went together and david was pretty happy since steve hadn't been there in about 3 weeks..but anyway, the long weekend was relaxing..but now i gotta go back to work..and i wont be going home this weeknd bc i have duty :) leave some love..xO
let me start by saying..what comes around goes around...or is that backwards? what goes around comes around? anyway..i guess ditching mary a few times back, and not returning phone calls is starting to come back to me..although she said the past was in the past..anyway
heres what happened..
saturday-to make a long story short, i had plans with mary, and there was a misunderstanding in between, and she said to me *oh yeah well dennis isnt going so you probably dont want to go either* which really set me off, but when i called they no longer were going to the trail of terror, they wanted to go to a party with dennis, and i guess i couldnt go..but they brought nicole..so i got fucked..anyway, mary was supposed to pick me up at my brothers after they were done since i was too drunk by now to drive, but i was like fuck it why am i gonna sleep where im not wanted? well i dunno, im gonna go smoke a butt, its 1113 and im gonna head outta here and go to take a shower..xO
well i dont have duty this weekend, and i need a few things fixed in mycar, so im probaly gonna be making a trip back to CT again..after i get outta the range tomorrow (( hopefully i can fucking qualify )) ill probably stop and see david on the way home for a few, since its been a while, i kinda wanna see how hes doing..:( and ill probably sleep over at mary's, that way heather can fill my nails, we'll probably buy a bottle of captain mo..hopefully i wont feel awkward around dennis since hes been sayin shit about me to her, but im not sleeping with that fucking dog this weekend, and i wont go back on my word this time..im not letting him make me look like an asshole..
so work today was boring as shit, we fucked around all damn day, and sam figured out how to read my blurty, which is why im gonna either have to be careful what i post or make my post's friends only from now on..i cant deny drinking if it says i drank right here..and i cant talk shit about the assholes over there, if they all know how to see what im writing..i mean, i trust sam, and jay with a few things, because tehy wouldnt rat on me..but everyone at that damn place talks about everyone elses business like its high school gossip and it gets on my nerves. shit. i cant talk, i do it too...but still, it pisses me off..its all good though because im about to start a live journal..anyway, its like 3:30, i wanna clean my house up and pack a bag for this weekend, and make a few calls..xO kisses
It seems to me that there are more hearts
broken in the world that can’t be mended
What do we do? What do we do?+
well get this, my friend duane calls me last night, weve been tlaking a little lately and were probably gonna meet up since hes in new jersey right now for A SCHOOL, and id liek to chill with him atleast once before he gets stationed across the united states..but anyway, i guess he was searching for his name on google, and he types in *duane zitta* and guess what comes up? my journal...so i dunno, i was kind of imbarresed, because i dont know what i wrote, im gonna go back and take a look at it..so anyway..i went to the range today with work, and didint qualify of course, god i suck so bad at shooting..i think its because im scared of it, like im scared that the 9mm is gonna like fly out of my hands and whack me in the head or something, so im going back tomorrow with Reidy since he didint qualify either..but im gonna get goin to bed, im exhausted, the fat ass gunners-mate tired me out today..nite nite
ok so my 19th birthday was good, i wen home tuesday night..and slept at marys all week..its been fun lately since i always say im gonna chill with her and never end up chillin...so anyways, tuesday we went down to LaBomba's where jamie works and drank for free, wednesday..ummmm oh yeah i spent al day with my mom, she bought me diamond earings, and we went to yoga and shit LoL..thursday me and mary went to labombas again, and we were supostr to go to Alchemy then to Stagedoor johnnys but i got way too shitty..and ended up not being able to go anywhere, however it was an expereince..a cop saw my butt when i tried to squat and pee, and there was so much more funny shit but i really cant rememjbr it now..i ended up going to visit dave on thursday and everyone was pissed at me, dennis pissed me off because he kept saying oh you went to see ur boyfriend in jail, and daves NOT my fucking boyfriend..if he was, then i wouldnt have even messed with dennis because i wouldnt have cheated..so i was in a really bad mood bc i was sick and i kinda took it out on him..i guess he was pissed at me for not calling and saying goodbye..so i guess im gonna try and give him a call before bed...and see if he hates me lol .nightxo
alright where to start..lately i have been so confused, and lost in the mix of things between me and david..and sorta forgot that I should come first. I guess i got too caught up with all of the "I Love Yous" and the "I wanna be with you when im outta jail's" that i forgot the fact that me and him are only friends. so i took a break from going to see him, although i got a birthday card from him in the mail today :) i took some time off of work next week for my bday, and im gonna go home for the week, probably chill with mary, and my family, and spend the weekend at daves mothers ofcourse. last week was a lot of fun, ive been working so damn hard up in boston getting ready for an annual inspection that they gave us all wednesday through sunday off! dennis, marys cousin was kinda interested in me and i missed mary n robin anyways so i decided to chill at her house that WHOLE week. it was overdue..we had fun though, and the week before that me, mary and cherie went to the strip club, it was hysterical. i was reading back on a few of mary's posts, and i guess i kinda offended her by not hanging out. i mena she IS however the only one whose came to see me up here, besides erin, and shes the only one whos ever there to listen to the tears and hear me out when no one else will. i guess i have made a few choices to blow them off, but most of those times that she took offense to me not returning phone calls i was legitimately busy...like when i fixed my car with my dad and shit..im sure my bday week is going to go great though..ill be home tues night so if you want to make plase..gime a call! wednesday is my bday, and im gonna be with mommy, hopefully someoen will take me shopping, i need winter clothes desperately! but i guess im gonna get going now, because i need to call my ma, and david is calling :) kisses xO
well, last night was interesting..a typical saturday night at my apartment..had a few ppl over, jsut the close friends though..me brandon jess michelle marco mike and 2 other kids who were michelles friends bc michelle and jess wanted to roll...so anyway..we jsut chilled here all night as usual, and i had work this mornin..its really nice out today, and i hear its supposed to be like 80 tomorrow..yeahhh!! oh yeah! i went to the malla nd therw 100$ out the window lol..since i got my new credit card i had to use it ofcourse! so i bought 2 prs of shorts, that dont really fit, i gotta lose that 15 pounds..and i bought a few summery shirts n shit, i dunno, this was a pointless post, so im gonna get going, i have to eat TACOS!!
i say with much experience live life as it comes, because eventually you will learn the differences between holding hands, and falling in love, that kisses don’t always mean something, promises can be broken as fast as they can be made and sometimes goodbyes are really forever. but don’t ever regret what you did because at what point what you did was what you wanted, i did regret some of what i did and as i look back i wish i did more stuff that people said i shouldn’t. but be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it. don’t ever forget it takes a thousand voices to tell a single story, don’t ever judge another, if you do judge people you have no time to love them. don't ever forget that the journey in between what you once were and who you are now becoming is where the dance of life really takes place. things never change, we do so wherever you put yourself is were you belong. but you will survive because the human spirit is stronger then anything that happens to it and there will always be someone there to help you, and that person is your self. so with that all taken in enjoy yourself these are the good old days you're going to miss in the years ahead... much love to all <3
so, i steal all of her quotes...but they got alotta meaning..so, iput em in here to make me think..as intellectually as she does
well..i had an awesome week..didint do shit today at work except for drive all over massachusetts, and it was a pretty good time with sam..this guy i work with..he scared the shit out of me though, bc he told me a few things that will make it so i can officicially never trust a male again! im talkign to my baby in cali right now, as we speak...why does the person you always wanna see at that time always have to be so far away! idunno, quick subj. change..i miss mary! havent talked to her all week..and id liek to know whats goin on in her life! after i post, im probably gonna read her blurty so i can see what shes been doing lately..but iduno..i got a homeless coastie layin on my couch right now, and i wanna go chill with him, so im gonna comment and shit then get offline...xO
its been a while, but i been kinda busy, last week we were out on the boat for a few days and i was so exhausted when i got home...then i had to pack to go back to CT for the weekend..which as usual..SUCKED...i saw mary on friday and went to her friend brandy's house for a few, then went back home to check on my mom..i ended up seeing dave anyways even though i knew i shouldnt..and slept over his brother steves after i found out my momma was ok..i duno, things went really well in that area..he was really nice to me, and told me he loved me...but ofcourse i havent heard from him since! anyhow, saturday night i went to the method man concert and got stuck in traffic for HOURS, i had plans with mare to go over brandy's again, but ended up passing out as soon as i got in my front door, i know i shoulda grown some balls to call her and say i wasnt coming, or returned the call after i found out shew as mad at me, but i duno, i just didint, and my intentions werent to blow her off..her and rob do alot for me, and i definitely do appreciate it, mary is like my best friend! i duno...whenenver i come home, my head gets all fucked up, and i make stupid decisions, i know this bc it happened last time i was down, and i made another stupid deciscion on easter that made it so i got stuck takin a train home again...i went to geri's for easter brunch, and was only supposed to be there until 1, but i duno, we started eating late..and i never ended up making it to my grandmothers for easter dinner, my mom was pissed, and i dont blame her, and she told me if you dont make it here, im not comin up there..so ofcourse she didint come up..and im sitting here, alone, thinking about all the stupid choices i made this time...its liek ya know..i made my bed and now i have to sleep in it sorta thing..i duno, its gettin late, and im gonna go to bed for real..xo nite
another one of marys famous quotes that i had to rob from her
therez alwayz q0nna be 0ne thinq [ y o u . r e q r e t ]
0ne pers0n you wish you [ n e v e r . m e t ]
and 0ne kiSs you sh0uld have [ n e v e r . l e f t ]
wow, i jsut woke up liek an hour ago..i cantbeleive i slept the whole day away, i guess i needed it, i was so depressed this morning..for no reason..jsut one of these days, ya know? ((im getting my period)) so i slept it all away..then i get a wake-up call from the unexpected....we all know who...i wonder why hes been calling me lately...well, i know why..he wants some pre-clinker pussy, before he goes away..but im set in my ways of it not happeneing..casual sex between me and dave isnt possible..anyways, ((im eating oodles of noodles, hence the subject)) i was still depressed, so i call my mom...and johnny says that shes not home..her and daddy got into a fight agiain, and she took off, and he says she isnt coming home until everyone is asleep..so i called her, and we talked for like..EVER, i guess shes holding in there, my moms a pretty strong woman, shes jsut worried that johnny wont be able to handle all this drama..shes coming to see me i think over april vacation to get away from everything, and shes bringin johnny i think..i told her to be upfront withim, bc if she isnt hes gonna feel like she lied to him, and thats no good...i duno, that was pretty much my day...oh and i talked to wrin for an hour lol..shes the only one who will stay on the phone with me for that long, we will both be wicked bored, and talk about absolutely nothin at all of any importance lol...just to entertain eachother...well im gonna get goin, and resume my spot on the couch until someone comes and delivers me my 12 pack, then ill be drunk, and still chillin on the couch....: ) idunno, im out..
wow, last night was definitely the best night ive had since i moved outta ct...i was wicked tired and didint wanna party, but ofcourse decided to anyway...i had michelle, jess, rachel, and these 2 guys who michelle and jess were hookin up with over..and we jsut bullshitted till like 4am...we all decide to go to bed..and i get a phone call from hebner, who wants to come over at 5...so im like ehhhh yeha y not?? they came over and i stayed up all freaking night with them when eveyone else was passed out in random places allover my house..and hebner and bretty ((the 1 w/ diabetes)) satyed here till ike 9 am...damn, im not even tired..and the funny thing is, we didint even really drink that much, but i jsut havent pulled an all-nighter in like a year so, it was definitely a good time, i dunno, i got a huge mess to clean so im gonna get goiin, so i can nap and prep for tonight, leave some <3 me
thank god for fridays...well after work today i went to michelles and we watched texas chainsaw massacre, i finally got to see it..omg it was fucking gross!! people say that that shit actually happened..eew..well anwyyas, cory fucking calls me at 4 in the morning last night, when i had work the next day..he has a habit of doing that..not that i wanna talk to that kid anyway! last time he called at 4, when i had work the next day, and was mad that i wouldnt get up to comeover! oh well, god he pisses me off, i guess he told michelle about how he was talking to other girls,a nd he showed her pics, so she showed me...and i duno it was this dramatic thing bc he things hes liek a player or soemthing, and he claims he only told chelle bc he knew she would tell me which i know is bullshit but i really dont care..i duno, anyways, i fucking hate that kid..GOD, jsut talking about him gets on my nerves! well i have michelles car tonight, until she gets outta work..lol shes got a pimp ride..better than mine ofcourse! im gonna go wash this dye outta my hair, and probably call up my mike, from weymouth, get pretty, and after that proably pick up chelle n jess from work so we can party! leave me some love, and ill post tomorrw to tell you how my friday was..seems like everytime i chill with michlle n jess, we party till like....7am! im outta here like a boner in sweatpants lol...i heard someone say that at work today and i thought it was the corniest thing..xO me
ok, this time, i swear, im only gona post ONCE!! it always shows up 17 times, lol..just figured id update real quick bc i know im not gonna later, brandons gonna sleep over, bc hes homeless, and were gettin pretty drunk already and its only 5, haha..so dave goes to court tomorrow, i hope that goes alright..im sure he wont be goin away yet, but i know that hes goin sooner or later..its only fot the better ya know?? seems like all ido is talkabout DAVE, DAVE, DAVE..even though i dont wanna be with him, it seems like my whole life concerns him, bc everything ive done for the past 2 1/2 yrs has been with him! jesus!! on a different not, i was gonna go get my tat tonight, but im probably gonna get it tomrrow..well i dunno, im gonna go rent a movie and get shitfaced..leave some love! <3 me
for some reason, my post goes on there 1237 times everysingle time goddamnit!
so i had an awesome day today, although it was shitty, rainy, and cold out..i didint do shit at work! but then i come home..and i have one word to say that will sum it all up....C O R Y...dude, hes too much..lol. he ims me and says "i read your journal" ok, so im like yeah? whatever..lol bc i really dont care, i tried waaay too long with that kid for somethin that wont ever work..now, ive moved on!! so cory, if u are reading this ((bc i know you are)) eat your heart out..you had plenty of chances..so i duno, on a different note, i talked to my hottie today! that kid duane zitta from boot camp, god..too bad hes in cali..i might be flyin out there soon, if i can ever afford it, if not ill wait until november to chill with him bc hes gonna be going to North Carolina, and thats not that far..about my apartment, i jsut bought the newspapaer, and im about to go read it, ill tell ya what i find..leave some love & comments <3 me
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