Truth's Blurty

I think God is teaching me stuff
Lately I have been overwhelmed with all that God is teaching me. Honestly I have never been taught like this by him before. I am very thankful for the growth but and weary from it as well. I have been having to make many real hard decisions as to what I believe in. I mean I have always believed that God was my savior and that I desired to live for him. But some of the things that I have been faced with have been intense and forces me to truly ask myself, do I believe in what I have been believing all my life? I, along with many other people have been feeling an urgency to be close to God. To be more intimate with my God to learn from him and glean from his goodness. I desire that so badly and yet I have taken no steps to get closer. Why is this? I am trading temporary things for the things that God wants me to have. He has a huge life he wants us to live for him. One that doesn't alway promise easy but one that we will be able to live to the fullest and truly feel alive. That is the life I want but I have settled for mediocre. Lord give me strength to overcome. Help me to not be judgmental, take away my pride and fill me with humility. If I am not in your will or what you desire I pray with all my heart that you will set me straight. Lord I do desire you first and foremost and if for any reason my actions have said otherwise I pray that they would change and be more for you. If I am a stumbling block or and problem in any way I pray that you would remove me from that. I love you so very much and I want to please you and do your will. Give me more strength, more wisdom, more grace, more understanding, more knowledge, more peace, and a heart like yours! Be my everything Lord. I don't want to say any of this in a nonchalant way, but truly from the depths of my heart! I desire you Lord. Bless your name, be blessed from my life! I love you!