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just felt like typing's Journal
ok in "and the award for stamina goes to..." i wrote " The sex was so great, i can wrap my hand all the way around!" I meant i CAN'T. and in a side note i wrote (and he is a little kid so it was simply outta pleasure not fear... he's got game) I meant he ISN'T. damn those are so fucked up type-o's
ok, so that client of my mom's is sooo hot and cute and sexy. I am so picky and don't like relationships, but i actually like this guy. which is a kind of mixed feeling deal, i havent liked anyone for a few years but i have a fear of comitment. not like other girls, i have the male version of the fear. i dont want to get bored, or too comfertable cause once you get too comfertable, the thrill is gone. As soon as the sex isnt exciting and i dont know he thinks im really hot, i feel let down and get bored. i also dont wanna think about him all the time and miss him and shit... thats so annoying. And what if i do like him, then all my plans for that guy at my mom's office go to shit? no i never give up for any reason. i guess i could just see what happens. We are kinda stuck with eachother for a while seeing as how he is my mom's client and once he does find a house he likes there will be about atleast a 30 day escrow. oh jeese he is so good at what he does too! ok so i spent the night at his very nice house that he is letting his brother live in for a while. oh he is so sexy. i cant tell the whole story, it is way to long so here are the highlights... oh man, the sex was great! i can wrap my hand around all the way! ok highlights, highlights, highlights... on like our third time or something, on our side he was shaking ( and he is a little kid so it was simply out of pleasure not fear... he's got game.) dont ask my why, but gawd that was sexy, his 70's style hair was all wet and he had his arms wrapped tightly around me, dude i could write a cheesy romance novel off of those few minutes alone. oh he is so sexy!!!! i want to jump him everytime i look at him. oh and while we were upstairs, my bestfriend and his brother were down stairs! hahahah glory claim! ok i cant think about this anymore or ill "just hafta start humpin' this lamp". ok ill write more later grrrrwl he is so hot!
Current mood:
giddy.Current music: ciggarettes and chocolate milk.
I love being me! i would never wish to look like anyone else... i am (almost) every man's dream girl. the almost is for the guys who like fat, ugly girls... bahahahaha. see; most girls are full of themselves but they are really full of shit, dillusioned by too many people telling them "you are a beautiful person" duh that means you are hideous! anyway im a model so i can be full of me! today A cop made me give him my #, I made some guy buy me water from a place that he worked at, and met the man of my summer dreams ( ill get bored once i get my other guy)... i explained the cop thing and now let me explain how good i am. ok so my mom said she had a "very handsome" client in his mid 20's and so i, ofcourse, wanted to meet him. She said that he was obsessed with my pictures that she has on her desk and kept telling her " you did a good job, good job d-----e" so i went with her today to show him a town house ( 3 bedrom 3bath... $259,000 that he is paying for and can still afford a in home masuse at 24) and he was awstruck by me.. ofcourse....and my mom said that that was the first time that she has ever seen him embarrsed cause he had just gotten off work and was all dirty and sweaty and sexy and anyway he was hitting on me so i gave him my "im sexy AND checking you out" look with the delaid reaction "oh i ddint know you were looking at me while i check you out" look... its kinda my sexy innocent look that got me into modeling blah blah his car ran outta gas cause he didnt have time to stop. well we took him to the gas station to get him gasoline and while my mom was talking to him i was sitting in the car and the gas station attendant get staring at me while he got some sobe out of the stock room... well my mom was thirsty and i wanted to inda tease that hot guy by showing him that i can get any man to do anything i tell them do to. so i hopped outta the car and walked to the stock room. "hey buddy.." "uh uh huhhuh ya?" what is your rank of employment here?" " uh i clean and stock things" " oh really? do you think they would notice if a little thing was missing?" "what do you need?" "well, see my mom is thirsty and we ddint bring any money with us and i cant let my mommy stay thristy..." "well come in side and get anything you want" and i thought damnit! i want this guy to watch me! " cant you just give me one of those" "but the are warm" "oh she doesnt care" "just go get a cold one" "ok fine" and i was making gestures of me drinking while my mom and that guy looked very curiously at me from accros the parking lot so we stated walking into the store " arent you gonna get into trouble for doing this?" "no, ill just pay for it." "oh you'd do that for me, what a sweetheart" hahahahaha "its called kharma" "good out look" the i ran into that hot guy " are you hitting on the gas station attendant???" "NO!" like ah hell no is what i was thinkning. so anyway he motioned for me and i walked back to him and he handed me a five and said "get whatever you want" "oh thanks are you sure" "ya i just got paid" so i bought a bottle of water and gave him his change "oh thats all you wanted" "ya thanks" "hey so can i ge-" "well my AND my bestfriend will be in her allitle later" "oh then ill be here" "oh i got to go thanks again bye" BAHAHAHAHA my momsaw the water and started laughing and saying she was embarressed but she really loved it. it turns out that while i was making the gas guy buy me water the othe rguy was getting jealous and poop ok im tired ill write morew later maybe
Current mood:
horny.Current music: rufus wainwright....great voice!.
I gave my # to a poe! I love cops and allways flirt with them but ive never had one ask for my number before.... not even ask... tell me! He was leaning in my car window and chatting with me tonight and he just kept talking and when he asked where my b/f was i knew he wanted me! I told him my name and told him he could look me up online... and when i told him the web addresses he said " im not gunna remember that..... why dont you just give me your #?" bahaha BUT I dont know why i really dont know why im so gay ... im scared! He wasnt unattractive.. prolly about 28 or so and told me his first name i want to call him officer blah blah but i dont know is last name! Its the whole uniform, authority, submission (on my part) that attracts me to poes! im guuna fuck a cop... not him, my bestfriend will take care of that.... I have my eye on a sexy cop but i havent called him yet (at his work). OH and today I met the second hottest non famous guy on earth... the first being the one i am waiting for. These two guy are polar opposites.... the 1st hottest is total GQ, 26, rich, armani suits, mercedes, buisness man awwwwwww oh he is so sexy with those bright and deep ( dont aks me how they are both but they are) blues eyes. the one i met today has 70's surfer dishwater blonde hair that flips up....sexy... green blue mixed eyes, tall, tan manual laborer look, that rides a harley and drives a truck. He is my trick now... bahahah im going to start a new page now for a different ( kinda subject)
Current mood:
shocked.Current music: rufus wainwright....great voice!.
i have so much that i could write about... and yet i dont. i want this so i can remember my summer but i havent written hardley anything. well I met this hot guy at a movie set (25 hard body black hair blue eyes) well i called him and went out to his place about 2 hrs away or 1 depending on how the traffic is. and i stayed the night there. this guy was sooo tiny it was sad. then blah blah blah yesterday i was supposed to go pick up some pics from my manager at 11:45 but my mom had an appointment with her accountant at 1 so we said that we would go afterwards. well we get to the office and i am at the bottom of the stairs and i can see a nice pair of converse. i thought ok he has got a young assistant, chances are he is ugly as hell. i look alittle bit higher up and see nice ants like desiel or whatever and i automatically think gay! and he has on a nice shirt too he has to be gay. well i reach the face and see, i swear, river pheonix! grrrrrrwwll! he has to be gay... he is to hot i mean come on river pheonix! anyway we talked and i made him walk out to my car with me and when we were leaving me and my awesome confidence ask him "hey buddy do you have a piece of paper." "sure" "can iask you an awkward question?" "sure" "are you staright?" bahahaha "yes." so looked at him for a second debating and pulled the paper toward me and wrote down my number. "do with it what you will." and he just staired at me. "ok?" "uh..ya?,oh! ya ok.... ok ladies have a nice day!" hahah he is only 22 but thats ok cause he looks like river pheonix! and God i want that guy from my moms work~ ahhh gtg im leaving
Current mood:
rushed.
Nights of pasion, days of love
Only things i'm dreaming of
Your beauty fits mine like a glove
Something in me's stirring up.
And Ohh burning August
And Ahh pale september
And Ohh you've got me bad
But Ahh seems forever
Wishing of you, cause i've never been
It makes me cry now and again
The hardest part is knowing when
And hoping we'll agree by then
Smae
I feel so much, but cannot say
Untill a time so far away
I think about you everyday
But you think it's just a game you play.
Smae
****************************************
Childish thoughts, adult feelings
Are mixed inside of me.
True i've locked them deep inside
But still...i've kept the key.
Your warm body on a cold autum night
Would feel so safe and sure
Press me close so i can feel
Even more of your allure.
When that momnet finally comes
I'll pray it never ends
Press me close just one more time
Never say "let's just be friends."
I crave your touch
Oh to feel your hands
Don't ever stop kissing me
And i'll make no demands.
Please don't give me just a taste
A one night stand or one time go
I promise that i'll never stray
If you never leave me in a row.
All these things I long to tell
I want to shout, I want to yell
But i'll keep them and my tiny key
And keep these secrets just for me.
Current mood: obsessed.
i just got back from palm springs, wow! i was there for 3 days. it was fun but one night was great! It was cliche teenage vacation! My 2 friends and I stopped in a McDonalds and there were just some mexicans working, but then... a really really cute ahhhh so cute guy walked in! he was realy tall but not scruanie, he had an unnoticable little beer belly, shaggy dark brown hair, side burns, dimples and bright blue eyes. he was so hot and i got all anxie to talk to him but he had walked into the back of mcdonalds and i thought he might have gone out the back. so there was this guy was cleaning the bathrooms and i could hear him yelling "oh gawd!" in disgust. when he came out i said uh what did i say....i said... oh! i said " are you having troubles buddy?" and he laughed and said " the sink went crazy.". He went and got more cleaning stuff and came back to the bathroom and couldnt open the door so i said "keep pushing dude, you can do it!" and he said "no i think its locked" just the the door swung open and he almost fell through it! hahahaha! then i had a great idea! If that hot guy was in the back the guy that worked there must know him, so he came out of the bathroom and headed for the girls bathroomi jumped up and said "wait wait" and he jumped back thinking i had to pee or something and i walked over to him and said "hi, uh can i ask you a few odd questions?" "sure" "do you know that guy thats back there?" "ya he is my boss" "is he really stoned?" " no he is really drunk" " do you and your friend smoke?" "ya why?" "do you guys hang out outside of work?" "sometimes" do you guys wanna hang out tonight?" " i think we are gonna" "well, we are just visiting and have a $600 a night suite and since we dont know anyone we cant get any bud and i was wondering if you guyswanted to kick it tonight" "you dont have a room" so i showed him my key. " oh shit you do, ok let me get him" then some guy that he knew walked into the bathroom "dude can't you see we are making out?' hahahaha then he went to go get the hot guy but he was already walking toward us. oh before that some fat mexican bitch with silver caps on her teeth told him to stop talking to me, but he didnt listen. so anyway "oh hi, uh will you step outside with me for a minute?" "uh, what, uh ok" then we went outsideand i told him the same thing i told that other guy and then the other guy came outside with us. so i gave the hot guy my pager number and the other kid gave me his cell phone number. we said good bye and asked when they would page "right now as soon as you leave hahah" so we went back to the hotel room. my gay friend was in a bitchy mood so my straight friend and i hung out. they sadi would page me around 11:00 and at 11:30 i still wasnt paged so i called him, not the hot one... we'll call him bob and the hot one we will call jason. so i call bob and bob was on the phone with jason so i had them call me back on the hotel phone... ill write more later to be continued
Current mood:
nostalgic.Current music: jay and the americans.
it seems that in my anger i left out a word. my bestfriend is ugly, she's hot... the ugly ass, even if i was fat and hairy ugly, FRIEND. her friend is that ugly not her
Current mood:
predatory.Current music: i just like that mood logo.
what the fuck! my bestfriend is being so fucked up. we had plans to go out tonight with her ugly ass and i mean ugly ass even if i was fat and hairy and couldnt get a man ugly! anyway we were just gonna hang out with him and his friends and she said "ok so we will go out but his friend can't go cause he has to fly out and see his GIRLFRIEND at 1:00am so frank is bringing his other friend, i asked if he was cute and he said 'i dunno' so we'll see. so ill go with frank and bone him." oh and what the fuck am i supposed to do while she goes off and fucks this guy? sit there and twiddle my fucking thumbs for an hour?! fuck that! She has done this to me before too! we went out with these two realy ugly like 28 year olds and i made her promise she wouldnt leave me alone with the guy and go fuck the other one, because when one "couple" goes off the guy that is left with the girl thinks the smae thing is going to happen with him. well she left me with that bastard and while i was nervously and spitefuly talking to him he kissed me, i pushed him away and he picked my up and threw me on his bed while he tried... while practically molesting me.... to persuade me to fuck him. and she was fucking this guy while on her rag! talk about unsafe sex dude. "please give me aids." why would i ever go voluntarily into a position llike that again? and for her to be so selfish as to put me in a situation like that agian? how sexualy self undulged can you be? AND THIS GUY IS FUCKING UGLY! and she agrees i was like "dude, why are you going to do that that's fucked up and he is sooo ugly!" and she replied "ya know, i really dont care what your opinion of the guys i see is, its whats on the inside and wank size that counts" can you believe she said that, that is straight up dirty dude. "ill fuck anyone with a big cock. midgets, horses, black men...bring it on" i would never do that to her. but then again who could blame her with the values her fucking slut cunt mom has instilled in her. in exact words: " you have to learn one thing, yo uhave to have 5 guys, one to buy you breakfast, one to buy you lunch, one to buy you dinner, one to buy you presents and one to have fun with." she told us that when we were 10 years old! and she flashes guys with her and lets her go off with any guys that she wants. the woman is the only person i ever have or ever will wish death upon. but lets nit get onto the subject of that witch, there aren't enough hours in the day for that one. oh and she knows that her 16 yr old daughter has sex, but wont let her see me because she thinks i smoke ciggerettes. priorities are in place with that one huh. she is a fucking blonde bimibo using self indulged bitch. ok i guess i have ranted enough tonight, ill just write tommorow with the news of what turns out.
Current mood:
infuriated.
oh my gawd. what the hell happened last night??? ok so me and my bestfriend wnt over to my good friend's house, got shit faced and played truth or dare... thruth or dare! how gay is that?! it was my idea. bahahahaha! uh ya it turned into a very dirty happening. but my bestfriend kinda got with my other friend and that was my plan. i have a fat hickey on my neck damnit. i spent the night there and didnt get to sleep untill 6:00 am and woke up at 10:00. ok, i was getting with this guy... which was gay dude, he kept whining about being tired and doing too much work. well i was just about to, uh , help him out when this kid comes in the room and sits down on the bed. what the hell. i was like uh ok im going in the other room. i was so sluty last night kinda. well sluty for me... i was getting with two guys. the both new and diddnt care. one guy got but hurt when i was getting with the other guy on a "dare". so i was like "i'd better go make sure he isnt butt hurt." i walked out of the room and he was standing in the hall, i grabed his arm and threw him into the closest room and shoved him up against the wall a fucked with im for a few minutes. then pushed him off of me and said "intimidated yet?" cause i kept teases him about being scared of me. oh ya ahah he is yunger than me! never ever have i ever even like thought about touching anyone younger. but hell i was drunk and he's a cool head. i have witnessed my bestfriend doing so many dirty things, and visa versa. we are very naughty girls.
Current mood:
naughty.Current music: i'm watching "america's test kitchen".