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Blurty for nazi sinatra.
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| Monday, May 5th, 2003 |
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I feel like i've been in love with two people. One of them was John. I burned with such 18 year old fury for that boy. and it was miserable and it was confusing, but it was nice to know i was alive. it wasn't very sexual, though I was attracted to him he was a stoner with an eliet taste in music and angst against the government. it was very emotional and epic. never expressed, but still understood. On graduation, I said "I have all these things I want to say to you" and then I did, and he implied reciprication. and then there was summer without seeing him. and then i went to college and got cool. and then i came home for field work term. i had created a myth surrounding this john phillips character. i went to a party to see him, but saw his friends instead. and since then, we've been communicating via email and one phone conversation about the connection we sense. he likes andy warhol now. I like drugs now. We both have violent urges now. and the other will be described later |
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| Tuesday, April 29th, 2003 |
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| this isn't working for me anymore. | ||
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Blurty for nazi sinatra.
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