mood //	crestfallen
music //	marilyn manson

02.05.04 [16:42]   // dream //   I need a crash course in sign language, hell, in ROMANCE while we're at it.

Well, obviously I haven't quite disappeared yet. You probably gathered that from my entry on Tuesday, and the fact that I'm writing here now. You may have also gathered the reason; i.e., my domains all went like major-kaput and now I'm having to fix all this stuff in free time that I don't really have. -_-

Plus, it's been like the no good, very bad week from Hell, so it's nice to have a place to come to and just rant and such.

But anyhow, I will be leaving these parts.. very soon. :[ I just registered my third domain last night: http://beyond-sanity.org. That's where my blog will be at once I get everything running there. :/ I just really feel the need to move onto something different. Sticking around in the same place just isn't good for me anymore. It's not healthy. Plus, there's barely anybody still around here. Three more people seem to have left since last week. *sigh*

I'll do a friends cut before I leave, take off all the inactive journals. I'll keep the ones of the brave people that will still continue here, the ones I really feel I ought to keep up with. Everyone else; no offense if I take you off. Feel free to take me off once I'm gone. I'll be back every other week or so to check on the journals of the friends that I kept, but uhh.. that'll be it. :|


So anyway.

Murphy. Yes. Genius. I will henceforth worship him as god. Almost.

Well, the one thing that seemed to be going right this week was that Curtis and I seemed to be getting along real well again. I guess it's been going uphill again for a while, but this week was a good week. He even replied to my e-mail suggesting that he write an essay to submit to Orsôrum with, "An essay, you say? What an original idea! perhaps I can work my magic just this once." And.. yeah. It was a good week. He didn't mock me or make fun of me that much. I think he's grudgingly accepted that I 0wn him at circuits. ;x Err. Anyhow. We get along real well.

WELL, today that got screwed over TOO!

Everything was going fine in Physics. We did another circuit lab, and it was kinda funny. Nick had a headache so bad that he couldn't think, and was very amused by electricity and letting the current run through his finger. Me, my throat is so achy and sore I had practically no voice by the afternoon, so I was trying to talk, which, I already naturally don't have much volume. Well, this was a problem. (I was telling everyone I needed a crash course in sign language.) And then Erwin kept having these sporadic, hiccuppy giggle-fits.. I dunno what exactly was wrong with him. So anyway, Curtis was the only one who was normal, and that by itself is rather disturbing.

So anyway, we built the circuit, after deducing the fact that Curtis does NOT know how to hook up an ammeter. (He'd always reverse the two leads, so that when Nick turned the power on, the reading would be negative. This is something that's like automatic-failure on the lab practical next month.) Finally on one try he said, "Okay, I'm going to go AGAINST my intuition on which lead goes where," and amusingly he actually got it right that time. Then later we manipulated data, talked about the dollhouse, made fun of people... etc. Physics was fine.

Then we got to Pre-Cal. Which was fine too, up until right before the end of class. I couldn't help overhearing Curtis talking to Justin and Robbie; they were actually talking kind of softly, but still, he sits two seats behind me with no one in between. Anyway, I'd been wondering all week why all of a sudden I see him walking everywhere with Kathleen McDonald, so when he mentioned her name I kind of perked up my ears.

Justin: So uhh, are you two like officially an item now?
Curtis: I'm not sure about.. officially.. but we like each other and that's all we care about
Justin: Have you had sex with her yet?
Curtis: ...yeah...
Justin: Whoo! Curtis is gettin' it on!

So. That was my day.

I'm sure you can imagine how I feel. I mean, him basically going out with Kathleen is one thing. But the sex thing.. I didn't need to know that.

I did NOT need to know that.

I would've rather not heard anything at all, and have gone on wondering the rest of the year about his feelings for Kathleen. But it's too late now, isn't it?

...

"If anything can go wrong, it will." It sure will.


Now all I really feel like doing is escaping into fiction. Working on my stories. Find some solace in that. But of course, NO. I can't even do that because I don't have TIME.

I guess I'll stick some paper into my backpack for school tomorrow. Though it's doubtful that I'll have any time.

Hmm. Know what would be good right now? Some nice, LOUD angry/depressed music. KoRn or Marilyn Manson, or even some of Staind's older stuff.


Namastë..

5 spread their wings and soared   //   space out and learn to fly

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