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she's lost in coma, where it's beautiful,
name: afton michelle k.
e-mail: ashre@moonshadow-garden.net
a view into the heart
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02.03.04 [22:16] // dream // Murphy was not a pessimist, he was onto something. Dissertation on Murphy’s Laws PROBLEM: Is there any truth to the laws formulated by Captain Edward A. Murphy? HYPOTHESIS: If it can be proven that “if anything can go wrong, it will”, then Murphy was not a pessimist but was onto something. MATERIALS: A human being, a semi-stable mind, a healthy dose of sarcasm and wit, and an overdose of bad luck and misfortune. PROCEDURE: Over a four-day testing period, record everything that goes wrong, and how each affects the other. DATA: It all began with Endore.com going out of business, which I found out on Saturday. This led me to realize that my personal domains needed new hosting (money loss; loss of files; what more could go wrong?). I had just rented a much-desired video game on Friday night, but was now having to push aside the time I had to play that game to find new hosting and get my domains back up. As a result of this combination of site problems and a video game, I did not get around to doing my homework. As a result of the negative karma that had accumulated over the weekend, I overslept Monday morning. Upon awakening, I realized I had failed to ask my mother for a ride to school for an extra-curricular Math practice test. This meant I had to take the schoolbus, which meant I had to rush out the door. As I came downstairs, the bus was already driving down Pine Crossing towards my house, so I failed to ask my mother for a ride home after school. When I finally did get to school on the bus, I had no time to do the homework I hadn’t done at home because of the Math test. This meant I had to rewrite my English essay in Study Hall, which in turn meant that I had to do my Physics lab in Chemistry, which in turn meant that I have no clue what is going on in the latter class because I wasn’t paying attention. At lunch, I had to call for the ride home because I hadn’t had the chance to ask my mom before leaving for school, and so I had to give up my money for a drink, which in turn meant that I was thirsty and my dry, scratchy throat that may now have turned into strep, did not find any relief. We lost track of time during the continuation of the test in the afternoon after school, which meant that I didn’t get home until 4 PM, which meant that I had an hour and a half to do domain stuff before driver’s ed and even less time afterwards, which meant that few problems actually got resolved, I barely had a chance to eat dinner, and I had no time to play my video game so my rental is going to waste. I also realized that just when everything was already a mess, a worksheet due for Pre-Cal the next day had suddenly mysteriously gone missing after having been in my backpack safely for three weeks, which meant I had to get Courtney to scan it, which meant Courtney forgot to retrieve it from the scanner and had to copy my copy of her copy again the next day. It also meant that I had to do the worksheet in study hall, which I should’ve been using to start on Physics homework that will inevitably pile up insanely by the end of the week. Not to mention the Chemistry stuff that I am inevitably not getting. And all of this is entirely destroying my plans to disappear from the Internet for the month of February, because obviously it is impossible for something website-related to go okay without me for one freaking month. So all the extra time spent on the Internet will cause less time to study for driver's ed (with possible chance of failing the permit test), less time to prepare for UIL, less sleep, less free time to enjoy myself doing simple things like reading and making actual use of video game rentals, less overall good health and mental stability... CONCLUSION: The hypothesis is accepted. If anything can go wrong, it will. The past four days of my life have definitely proven Murphy’s Law. Maybe I’m being over-analytical, whiny, hyper-sarcastic, sleep-deprived, pessimistic, angry, impatient, and overall just a sullen and downtrodden teen lashing out at the world, or maybe I have been having to do too many Physics and Chemistry labs, but with evidence like this, how can we not accept Murphy’s Law for truth? No, Murphy was definitely onto something. After all, it's only a matter of cause and effect.
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