Jessi's Blurty

I want to let go of you...
I want to let go of you but it's so hard because you were there for so long. Why is it now after so long that I find myself wishing that I never loved you at all? Why did I ever start to love you? How could I be so foolish to think I could find real love at my age? Is 20 still to young to really fall in love? I'm not looking to get married, and start a family, I still have to much ahead of me in life right now. I use to love the thought of you and I starting a family. I could see you holding a son that we both love so much. But now it seems as though it will never happen because you're still a child yourself. I wish that you would learn to grow up and stop looking for excuses for everything in life that holds you back. You can only hold yourself back, and I think that you're comfortable where your at with your mother packing your lunch, and doing your laundry.
How is it I am so strong but I find myself dating a loser? I don't understand how I could have come to this. Is it because I know that I will be the stronger one? Knowing that I can take care of someone? I only wish I knew what I was doing, or what I could do.

Current Mood: sad
Current Music: The wind chimes outside my windows.