01:22am 11/06/2004
  Well, due to many issues it is very unlikely that this journal will ever be updated again. I will be leaving it up for personal reasons. If you'd like to stay in touch with me, leave a comment and I'll tell you where you can find me.

to anyone who has ever thought of committing suicide...   
07:37pm 24/04/2004
mood: concerned
Ask the 25-year-old who tried to electrocute himself. He lived. But both his arms are gone.

What about jumping? Ask John. He used to be intelligent, with an engaging sense of humor. That was before he leapt from a building. Now, he's brain-damaged and will always need care. He staggers and has seizures. He lives in a fog. But, worst of all, he KNOWS he used to be normal.

What about pills? Ask the 12-year-old with extensive liver damage from an overdose. Have you ever seen anyone die of liver damage? You turn yellow. It's a hard way to go.

What about a gun? Ask the 24-year-old who shot himself in the head. Now he drags one leg, has a useless arm and has no vision or hearing on one side. He lived through his "foolproof" suicide. You might too.

But... Who will clean your blood off the carpet or scrape your brains from the ceiling? Commercial cleaning companies may refuse that job--but SOMEONE has to do it.

Who will have to cut you down from where you hung yourself or identify your bloated body after you've drowned? Your father? Your mother? Your wife? Your son?

The carefully worded "loving" suicide note is of no help. Those who loved you will NEVER completely recover. They'll feel regret and an unending pain.

Suicide is contagious. Look around your family. Look closely at the 4 year old playing with his cars on the rug. Kill yourself tonight, and he may do it ten years from now.

You DO have other choices. There are people who can help you through this crisis. Call a hotline. Call a friend. Call your minister or priest. Call a doctor or hospital. Call the police. They will tell you that there's hope. Maybe you'll find it in the mail tomorrow. Or in a phone call this weekend. But what you're seeking could be just a minute, a month, or a day away.

You say you don't want to be stopped? Still want to do it? -Well, then, I may see you in the psychiatric ward later. And we'll work with whatever you have left.

Remember: Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

If you're reading this, please copy it and post it in your journal!
05:10pm 06/01/2004
  Having 20+ journals was fun for awhile, but now I'm having less and less time to update them all.

I'm not deleting this journal, or even abandoning it, however let me say that this journal will not be frequently updated in the future.

You are more than welcome to keep me on your friends list, however if you feel the need you can remove me. IF you are interested in staying in touch and staying up to date with my life, add me over at LiveJournal (username: nobodysbusiness). It's friends only, so be sure to leave a comment on my public entry and I'll be sure to add you back. LJ is now code-free, so you can easily get one if you don't have one already.
10:04pm 07/10/2003
  This journal is becoming friends only...leave a comment if you want to be added.  
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i'm baaaaack!!!   
12:30am 28/06/2003
mood: drained
Did everyone miss me?

It's been the LONGEST day of my life (and I mean it, I had to relive the same hours over again), but I'm finally home. It was sad saying goodbye to everyone, but it's good to finally have some peace and quiet.

More about the trip later!
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it's time for me to go...   
12:18pm 08/06/2003
mood: anxious
...for awhile, anyway.

Tomorrow I am leaving for Australia and I will be gone for almost 3 weeks. I doubt that I will be able to update from over there, so this will be my last update until I get back. I will be back home on the 27th, but I probably won't update until the 28th or 29th because I'm sure I'll be dead tired.

Have a good 3 weeks everyone. I'll be thinking about you!
lessons i've learned...   
09:42pm 01/06/2003
mood: exhausted
Over the past couple weeks of working, here are some lessons I've learned:

~You can never have too much popcorn
~There is nothing worse than being on concession during a rush and having to pee
~Courtesy cups disappear FAST
~As do popcorn kernels
~You know you're in trouble when you're in the middle of an intense rush and there is no syrup in the soda towers
~It's impossible to talk teenage girls and older ladies into buying a regular or value popcorn (as opposed to the child size)
~You always run out of quarters and pennies first
~You know the concession people are having a bad day when they're plotting ways to kill themselves back there
~Birthday parties are a PAIN IN THE ASS
~Our quarter machine isn't functional half the time

I'll probably think of more later...
catching up...   
08:30pm 26/05/2003
mood: exhausted
Ah yes...lots of stuff.

Soooooo much has happened in the past 2 days...these past 2 days seemed like a week long. I've hardly been home...I've either been working or at Grandma's house visiting family.

Saturday- I worked 10-8 which I wrote about already...then went to Grandma's immediately after. I finally met Lisa's boyfriend Greg...he was nice but very quiet, he didn't talk much the whole time he was there. I was in a talkative mood that night, despite being beyond exhausted after a very busy day at work. I must have been high on adrenaline or something. I yacked all through dinner, then after dinner, then we spent most of the evening showing Greg our home movies. It was fun watching them again.

Sunday- I slept late, my cousins went to church but I didn't go (obviously). I had wanted to go to the fair but we didn't go due to lack of interest (grrrr). But we ended up having fun anyway, we took a walk to the beach, ended up getting in a dandelion fight on the way there, we acted like we were 5 years old again and went to the playground at the beach. We were also writing crazy things in the sand. We went back to the house and watched the Spanish channel because we were bored...then we watched some cheerleader movie. Unfortunately I had to work, so I had to say goodbye to everyone (as they were leaving early the next morning), I'm a bit disappointed that I didn't get to spend more time with them. But I worked concession last night and probably made a good bit more commission. The highlight of the night was when the supervisor and the manager and a security guard had to tell off this guy for going to a corner of the upstairs hallway and pissing in a cup. Apparently he was too lazy to walk downstairs to the bathroom. Thank god I didn't see that.

Today- Worked all day. I was supposed to go to my sister's parade early this morning but it was cancelled because of the weather. Too bad, I was kinda looking forward to it. Actually, this morning I was too tired to get out of bed early so I'm not sure I would have made it there. The first thing I thought when I woke up this morning was 'oh god, it's gonna be a busy day at work'. I was right, we got absolutely KILLED today. I mean, people are off from work, the weather is bad, what else are you gonna do? We sold out at least 2 shows of Daddy Day Care, plus at least one show of Bruce Almighty, plus The Matrix had a good turnout. At one point I could not see the floor of the lobby from behind concession, it was just one large sea of people. Even the managers had to jump on registers to handle all the customers. We were all so busy that we couldn't do the small simple things like answer the phone. I finally got my break around 4, as did Joe, we ended up getting food together, it was fun chatting and talking about how tired we were. Today I made $35 in commission, over the weekend I must have made a total of at least $100 in commission. Yay! I just had to go through absolute hell to get it.
weekend plans...   
01:17am 23/05/2003
mood: excited
Well, late tomorrow night (or tonight, if you wanna get all technical) my aunt, uncle & cousins are arriving from Pittsburgh. Oh, and did I mention that my oldest cousin is bringing her bf? That should be...interesting, and different. Only problem is I gotta work for most of the time they're here- I work 10:15-8 on Saturday, 5:15-12 on Sunday, and 10:15-6 on Monday. Gaaaahhhhh...that's a lot of hours, at least I'll be getting a good paycheck, and I'll be around my boys. My sis and I have made tentative plans to go to the YMCA fair on Sunday with the cousins and some friends (before I have to work), should be fun if it all works out (I hope the weather holds out!). My sister is gonna be in 2 parades on Monday, but I'll only make it to 1 of them (because of work...grrrrr). After today I probably won't have much time to spend online, I'll be away from home 99% of the time.
out of boredom...   
12:14am 20/05/2003
mood: amused
I'm bored so I'm generating slogans using the Advertising Slogan Generator with names of coworkers:

Prolongs Active Andrea.
The Loudest Noise Comes From The Electric Josh.
Choosy Moms Choose Justin.
Cuts Allan Time In Half.
The Sweet You Can't Eat Without Zane.
We Do Jae Right.
Melts In Your Byron, Not In Your Hand.
Only The Crumbliest, Flakiest Ed.
Mama's Got The Magic Of Manny.
If You Want To Get Ahead, Get An Edwin.
We Bring Rob To Life.
Make Fun Of Cosmo.
Probably The Best Jack In The World.
Every Chris C. Helps.
Good To The Last Chris K.
Think Once, Think Twice, Think Marie.
Where Do You Want Daniel To Go Today?
Snap! Crackle! Paul!
Clunk Click, Every Patrick.

Let The Jeff Take The Strain.
Wouldn't You Rather Be Caesar?
The Cream Of TJ.
The Corey Drinker's Lighter Corey.

The generator is located here.
how fair is this?   
10:37pm 17/05/2003
mood: confused
Well...a few days ago I started a journal trading community...but it has been deleted, not by me. What happened? I understand if the Blurty people don't want such a community to exist on this site, I'm not gonna argue that. What pisses me off is that I never got any email or anything explaining why it was deleted. I thought I was being so careful (as I was enforcing the 18 & over policy as outlined in the Terms of Service), and its not like I was showing porn to underage kids!! But whatever...
i have a bad feeling...   
12:47pm 16/05/2003
mood: anxious
Tonight is gonna be chaos, between The Matrix and Down With Love and others.'s gonna be a long shift too, 4-12. Hopefully they'll put me on box or concession, they make the shift go faster.
i think it's time for an update   
02:37pm 11/05/2003
mood: calm
I've been working for the past 2's been rough. Floor drains me physically, concession and box drain me mentally, and I'm sick of hearing the same things over and over again on door. But I'll get used to the routine soon. I have a whole new group of people there to get to know...but I want the old crew back! *cries* At least some of them stay in contact with the theater...some are even coming to our private screening of The Matrix: Reloaded on Tuesday night.

Tonight: work 5:30-10:30, then I'm off tomorrow!!!
12:03pm 05/05/2003
mood: anxious
Oh my's all gonna be over tomorrow!!! I can't can't come soon enough!!!

By the way...I'm gonna continue to update this blurty journal even if no one else does.
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the end is near...   
05:15pm 01/05/2003
mood: anxious
LJ is acting up I'm posting here. Only 4 days to go...actually less. 4 days from now I will already be home for summer vacation!!! 1 week from tomorrow I will be returning to work. Hopefully within the next 3 days Erica will leave and I'll never have to see her again.
time is coming...   
02:16pm 28/04/2003
mood: anxious

Classes are done!!! Now I just must get through finals...
10:10pm 24/04/2003
mood: frustrated
Yeah...I'm still alive...not having a computer really sucks. I'm in Encore right now updating this...I wish I could do it from my room. This just comp will NOT load Windows ME. Therefore, I cannot run any of my programs, I have to trek to the computer labs to go online. I have a terrible feeling it's a virus...I may have to wait another week and a half before I can go home and have it debugged. I miss AIM, I miss checking out random sites without fear of anyone looking over my shoulder...arrrgghhh!

On the bright side...11 days left of school!!!
05:09pm 14/04/2003
mood: frustrated
LJ must be on overload again...NOTHING WORKS!!! I just updated, it took 4 tries before it would let me update. Plus I can't access my friends page or any other pages!!!
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10:20am 14/04/2003
mood: awake
3 weeks left of school!!!

And just 3 days till I go home for Easter!!!
09:52pm 08/04/2003
mood: ecstatic
I got the dorm I wanted!!! I can't believe it. I thought I had no chance at all.