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[12 Mar 2003|09:07am] Okay so figured I'd post over here. Though I'm not sure why as I have a tremendously addictive LJ . . . probably because not all of my friends are over there yet (but they will be soon!) Hehe. So this is me posting. I'm so lame. :-D 11 comments|post comment

[08 Mar 2003|08:50am] I've moved to LiveJournal - I'll still be writing here just not as much. post comment

Updates and Vid Recs [07 Mar 2003|08:56am] Updated both You Get Me and Rebellious today! Also, I made a list of music video recs! These are really great so check them out! Cowboy by Kid Rock, vidded by Sisabet An Angel-centered music vid. Hilarious video! Very well-made and obviously well-thought out. It's also my current obsession. You Outta Know by Alanis Morisette, vidded by Mexx A video that aims to show the differences between the B/A and C/A relationships. Beautifully made - it made me cry. *sniffle* You Get Me by Michelle Branch, vidded by Bluecanary Extremely cute Anya/Tara music vid with amazing editing! Slash ahead! Adorable! I Wanna Talk About Me by Toby Keith, vidded by Xandra OMG! A Giles-centered vid - and it's awesome! Perfect even! And so cute! *sigh* 3 comments|post comment

[06 Mar 2003|01:27am] [ mood | accomplished ] [ music | The Watchers Song - Anthony Stewart Head ] Update You Get Me with four - count 'em, four, new fics! And a quiz! Go me! Now I just need to get around to updated Rebellious . . . Angel was good but it - I hate to say this, but it was my least favorite episode of this season. I have loved this season, so saying it wasn't the best doesn't mean it wasn't good. I mean there was Faith, which I totally loved! But there was something about it that left me not happy with it . . . probably because of the way they ended it, with evil!Cordy and Connor . . . it just . . . eh. The Wes/Lilah stuff was just - *sob* - and I adored the Wes/Faith stuff and don't try to tell me there wasn't Fred/Faith subtext! So yeah good - but not the best. Hoping for better for next week. I think I know what *really* disturbed me - no Wes/Fred - at all! Grr . . . Oooh and there is hope for Weda scenes! It's confirmed that the whole cast of Angel will guest on Buffy before the season is over! There will be subtext, dammit! There will be! If there isn't I will hunt Joss down and force him to read Weda fic until he agrees to make a Wes/Dawn spinoff! 4 comments|post comment

Remind me ... [05 Mar 2003|04:56am] [ mood | lazy ] [ music | "Cleanin Out My Closet" - Eminem ] Someone please remind me to update You Get Me and Rebellious today . . . please? :-) I've been so lazy and I *must* update. I have fics by Jennifer-Oksana and Rach to add to You Get Me and fics from Niu, Minim Calibre and Jennifer-Oksana to add to Rebellious . . . so remind me? 1 comment|post comment

Death to Buffy! Die, bitch, die! [04 Mar 2003|09:13pm] [ mood | bitchy ] [ music | "Cry" - Faith Hill ] Buffy is like a fucking cockroach. She won't fucking die. Why?! Die, bitch, *die*! Now. Okay "Selfless" was just on and this episode makes me rant. Majorly. See as much as I love Buffy's Angel speech, I hate Buffy with a fiery passion in this episode. Because she jumps so quickly to make the decision to kill Anya. Sure, Anya's a demon, but so is Spike. And she should have staked Spike's ass a long time ago and I'm too pissed off to even comment on how kinky that last thing sounded. Anya is my second favorite BtVS character after Dawn - I adore Anya and I do love this episode because it tells more of her backstory and I love the angst of it all. But Buffy pisses me off. My brain is too swirly to sound coherent right now so I'll just say this: Death to Buffy! Die bitch DIE! 2 comments|post comment

B/A Rant [04 Mar 2003|06:17pm] Okay so Toppie had a C/A rant in her journal, so B/A in mine. Lemme get this clear off the bat: I am a B/A'er through and through *but* I like C/A. There's something special there, definitely and they are mucho cute together, *but* I am B/A - if it didn't end B/A, I think it would be cheating everyone. Why? Because though C/A is special love, B/A is *true* love. It's timeless, classic . . . they're starcrossed lovers, and doesn't everyone just want to see the stars uncrossed? Just once? Romeo and Juliet had to die, Jack and Rose - well that didn't work out - so Buffy and Angel getting back together would be the ultimate way to end the epic of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Sure C/A'ers want C/A together - I get that, and I actually think it's possible to have both. Here's my theory - and this is pure speculation so I may be proven wrong . . . ******Theory******* Buffy and Angel *will* get back together at the end of this season and it'll be sweet and a dream come true, but it will happen right before Buffy dies - permanently. Giving B/Aers a good ending and still leaving room for C/A. ******End Theory****** So yeah that's my theory, feel free to bitch at me, though I may laugh at your stupidity. Ooh and go to Wild Horses because Emily always says things better than I can . . . 6 comments|post comment

Good News [04 Mar 2003|05:41pm] [ mood | okay ] [ music | "Volcano Girls" - Veruca Salt ] Good news! WMM has decided it likes Weda again! Yay! Uhm my old layout was so slow-loading, on my computer at least, so hence the plainness. I love this song! That's about it. post comment

Quizzes Make Me Happy [04 Mar 2003|10:18am] [ mood | better ] You are a Bitch. Which fandom archetype are you? brought to you by Quizilla Bitch? Me?! Hehe . . . YOU ARE "THE CRITIC" LJ!!! Buffy sucks. As do fans who disagree with that statement. Clearly the show has gone downhill since [insert: Your favorite character "changed": either too much or not enough / left / died, a writer / actor you hate gave an interview irrevocably denouncing your POV / interpretation of events / characters, etc.]. Oddly enough, the only thing that doesn't suck is your Buffy fanfic. According to you, anyway. Which Annoying Buffy Fandom LJ Cliche are YOU? brought to you by Quizilla Okie . . . Arrrr. Your slash pair is Wes/Fred from Limp Bizkit. (Kinda.) Your stories are FUCKING ANGRY, DUDE! They're always fighting, but they seem to get it on eventually. How adorable. Who's *your* slash pair? brought to you by Quizilla Wes/Fred!!!!! Hehe so it's not *the* Wes/Fred, still . . . Angel. Who's your male Buffy soul mate? brought to you by Quizilla I think I'm falling in love with Angel . . . but I wanted to get WES! Buffy Summers. Who is your female Buffy soul mate? brought to you by Quizilla Nuh-uh! You're Fred! Which Angel character are you? brought to you by Quizilla Ooooh! You're Wesley and Faith, former Watcher and Slayer. You're not a couple on the show and you never have been. Still, millions of fans can dream can't they? You're naughty and dangerous, but full of insecurity. Which Angel Couple Are You? brought to you by Quizilla Damn straight! You're the Ratings Ploy Crossover. No real reason for it, apparantly, it just is. You like your angst and you like it thick. Pain is all you're about and pouring salt into an open wound is something you're good at. But hey, at least we got to celebrate Thanksgiving nicely and oh yeah, naked Angel! Whoo hoo! Too bad Buffy doesn't remember it... Which Buffy/Angel Crossover Are You? brought to you by Quizilla There was a reason! Well okay so no - it was sweet anyway! Birthday - The Vision Kiss. Sure, he was insane and she didn't really know him, but whoa mama! What this says about you: you're very intuitive and go with your gut instincts about a situation. You usually do the right thing in a weird situation too. Still, sometimes you should stop and think about what the hell is happening. Which Angel/Cordelia Kiss Are You? brought to you by Quizilla Yay? You're Cordelia Chase, queen of Sunnydale High School. What this says about you: You're pretty shallow and self-serving. Bitchy doesn't even begin to cover it, but that's why everyone likes (read: is afraid of) you. Don't worry, I'm sure you'll grow as a person. You're kind of over-sexed too. ;) Which Angel Spin the Bottle Personality Are You? brought to you by Quizilla Uhm cool? You are Isabel Evans. Which Roswell Alien Are You! brought to you by Quizilla Yay! You're Tortured!Wesley. Being battered around at graduation to Faith's torture session, the explosion, getting shot and getting his throat slit, it's clear that Wes gets tortured often. What this says about you: Whether you're physically or emotionally scarred, your life sucks. You're always getting dumped on and everything seems to happen to you. But don't worry, things'll get better. Wounds heal and you'll be okay. Eventually. Which Wesley Are You? brought to you by Quizilla Wow . . . if you say so . . . Giles: While he helped you get over that whole "ending the world" thing, you began to realize how sexy he looked on a horse. What Willow 'ship are you? brought to you by Quizilla My emerging B/G 'shipper is fighting this . . . You are VANESSA CARLTON! You and your girls are always sitting in groups and staring across the room at those hot guys. You are the girly-girl and like it. Girl Power! Are You More Like Avril Lavigne, Michelle Branch, or Vanessa Carlton? brought to you by Quizilla *dances* I adore Vanessa! Rinse What Vanessa Carlton song are you? brought to you by Quizilla Oooh well that's not good . . . You are Here With Me. You pushed away your last boyfriend and now know you made a mistake, you want him back so badly you wrote a song to tell him. Which Michelle Branch song are you? brought to you by Quizilla I love that song! B/A! pure What's YOUR sexual fetish? brought to you by Quizilla Pure . . . *right!* Romantic movie! You probably won't star in a porno anytime soon. You seem to be really into the whole "love" thing...romantic sex with perfumed sheets and candles all over the place. You're probably a hopeless romantic. You value sex and respect your partner too much to do anything like porn. AWWWWWW! <3 What kind of porno would you star in? brought to you by Quizilla Isn't that special? Are You Afraid Of The Dark? Telling ghost stories that scare the crap out of me is your goal in life. Please stop, the clowns'll eat me... What's Your 90's Nickelodeon Show? brought to you by Quizilla I LOVED THAT SHOW! Blue Eyes What Color Eyes Should You Have? brought to you by Quizilla Fuck you! You are cutting What Self-Mutilation Are You? brought to you by Quizilla That's actually scarily accurate. Emotional Wreck. You are extremely emotional. You feel contentment moreso than happiness and your emotional lows are to the extreme. You need to cheer up and start enjoying your life. Where there is rain there is a rainbow and you need to see it more than others. Do something that makes you happy. How Emotional Are You? brought to you by Quizilla Big surprise . . . Envy Which of the Seven Deadly Sins are you? brought to you by Quizilla Another big surprise . . . The Evil Cousin! You are practical, but fun. Not the silliest jelly doughnut, but you're at least a slice of toast. Maybe some jam. What Random Image From My Computer Are You? brought to you by Quizilla Yay? But on a good note, thanks to Sky and Topaz and Quizilla I now feel better! post comment

*sob* [04 Mar 2003|07:14am] [ mood | rejected ] What do you do when someone you adore, someone you consider a friend, inadvertantly offends you? And not just mildly offends you, offends you to the point of close-to-tears-ness? And then you start to feel stupid for even being offended in the first place, because maybe you shouldn't take such frivolous things so seriously but you still feel like you want to cry? What do you do? post comment

Survey thing . . . [03 Mar 2003|05:08am] [ mood | bored ] [ music | Kid Rock - Lonely Road of Faith ] Stole this from Em's blog! 9 Stunning Movies 1. American Beauty 2. Cruel Intentions 3. The Green Mile 4. Forrest Gump 5. Girl Interrupted 6. The Sixth Sense 7. Unbreakable 8. Playing By Heart 9. Crazy/Beautiful 8 Great Actresses 1. Eliza Dushku 2. Sarah Michelle Gellar 3. Angelina Jolie 4. Alyson Hannigan 5. Kirsten Dunst 6. Tara Reid 7. Amber Benson 8. Liza Wiel 7 Lovely Actors 1. Alexis Denisof 2. Seth Green 3. Tom Hanks 4. Anthony Stewart Head 5. Sean Hayes 6. Jay Hernandez 7. Kevin Spacey 6 Fantastic Writers 1. Buffonia 2. Emily 3. Jennifer-Oksana 4. TopazAngel 5. Rach 6. Princess Twilite 5 Delicious TV Series 1. Angel 2. Buffy the Vampire Slayer 3. Roswell 4. Smallville 5. That 70's Show 4 Amazing Bands/Singers 1. Vanessa Carlton 2. Michelle Branch 3. The Bee Gees 4. Garbage 3 Breathtaking Songs 1. Vanessa Carlton . . . anything by her actually . . . 2. Michelle Branch, "Something to Sleep To" 3. The Bee Gees, "How Deep is Your Love" Only three? I can't choose only three . . . there's so many songs I love 2 Loveable Characters 1. Wesley 2. Dawn 1 Unforgettable Line Ask me later. Can't think at the moment. 4 comments|post comment

Faith/Wes IM [01 Mar 2003|05:02am] Chosen Rogue: Sorry about that my computer froze darkpryce: I understand darkpryce: Its okay Chosen Rogue: Wes I'm going to say this once and if you refuse to listen, fine. Chosen Rogue: I want to be your friend. And that doesn't mean we have to talk about your confusion or anything that may disturb you Chosen Rogue: I just want to be your friend darkpryce: Its not that easy Faith...I know you want it to be...I want it to be to...But if you can't understand me...Or you can't let me talk about things with you, with out getting angry that I'm not telling you what you want to hear...Its not going to happen...This friendship is going to take work and time...And I don't get the feeling you are willing to do that...You want to make up and make everything better...And that can't happen...Not yet...Things are too complicated...It takes work. Chosen Rogue: Wes I'm not angry and I haven't been angry for a long time darkpryce: I'm not talking about anger... Chosen Rogue: darkpryce: Its not that easy Faith...I know you want it to be...I want it to be to...But if you can't understand me...Or you can't let me talk about things with you, with out getting angry that I'm not telling you what you want to hear Chosen Rogue: Yeah you are darkpryce: Its just that you don't want to understand that I don't do things the same way you do...I am not as comfortable... darkpryce: Okay...SO I said anger... Chosen Rogue: How can you tell me what I want to understand, Wes? darkpryce: Because you are telling me how to go about this...You want me to handle the situation how *you* would...And I am not going to do that. Chosen Rogue: And I get that you're not comfortable - but why? You don't want to be friends with me because we fucked? Because you've seen me naked and did things to me that make even me blush? Chosen Rogue: I'm not telling you how to go about this, Wes darkpryce: Because I am not comfortable with myself yet Faith... Chosen Rogue: I just want to be your fucking friend okay? You are so goddamn frustrating, you know that? Chosen Rogue: Just forget it Chosen Rogue: Forget everything Chosen Rogue: Forget me darkpryce: And you aren't darkpryce: See darkpryce: You can't talk darkpryce: If it doesn't go your way darkpryce: Then you just... darkpryce: Get pissed off...And forget it... Chosen Rogue: This is not talking, Wes. This is you telling me that you don't want to talk to me. This is not communication darkpryce: No...This is me telling you that I wish you would listen...But you won't. darkpryce: It doesn't go your way...So you don't listen Chosen Rogue: Wes I don't think we're even in the same conversation darkpryce: No. darkpryce: Its been going this way since we broke up. Chosen Rogue: Yeah it has darkpryce: YOu say things darkpryce: I say things Chosen Rogue: Here's what I'm getting: I want to talk to you, you tell me you're not ready to talk to me, I get hurt, you get mad, and then I want to forget about everything darkpryce: It becomes a huge argument darkpryce: No Chosen Rogue: Please explain to me what you want me to listen to> darkpryce: YOu aren't making any effort to listen or understand... Chosen Rogue: Yes I am, Wes. You just can;t see it through all of your confusion darkpryce: I tell you I am not ready to talk, and you tell me that if I can't tell you then forget it. Chosen Rogue: No Wes that is NOT what I'm saying darkpryce: And have you ever thought that that is what I want you to understand darkpryce: I am so confused right now that I can't see anything for what it is...And I have been telling you that for a week...And you won't listen. Chosen Rogue: That you're confused? I get that but you need to work past your confusion and it's going to be hard as fuck on your own darkpryce: See Chosen Rogue: See what? darkpryce: Maybe for me it would be harder having you around\ darkpryce: You just want me to do what *you* would do... darkpryce: Thats not me. Chosen Rogue: Okay it's not you. I just won't come around. I won't talk to you. When you're ready you come to me, okay? Does that work for you? darkpryce: I am going to Sunnydale with Willow for a few days...The plan is to come back...And not be so confused... Chosen Rogue: Well I hope it works out for you darkpryce: I just need a few days to myself...To think...Sort everything out...I hope that you...Understand darkpryce: Because I *really* do wanna stay friends Chosen Rogue: You know I'm not going to lie, and I don't want this to start a big argument again, but I find that hard to believe darkpryce: Fine...This is what I mean Chosen Rogue: So should I lie? Would you prefer that? Chosen Rogue: Because fine, I'll lie. darkpryce: If you think me having to think to myself means that i don't want to be friends with you, then you don't know me very well. darkpryce: No. Be honest. Thats fine. darkpryce: I'd rather no how you really see me. Chosen Rogue: That's not what makes me think you don't want to be friends, Wes. Chosen Rogue: How do I really see you? Chosen Rogue: Are you sure you want to know? darkpryce: Then what is? darkpryce: Yes darkpryce: I want to know Chosen Rogue: I think you're sad. It's sad what you've become, you're hardly yourself anymore and it makes me want to cry. I miss you so much, and I don't mean romanticly, I miss *you* and yeah confusion, whatever. Still more has changed, you've changed entirely and you're not the man that I used to know. You're - different. And not better, and I want the old you back. You're everything to me - you were everything to me. And now - you're gone. darkpryce: Fine. Say that. I have not chanbged Faith. Just because I am confused...That doesn't make me different...I just don't handle things the same way as you. But I am the same person I always was. You just don't want to realize that. I don't care anymore. If you don't want to understand what I am going trough thats fine. But don't tell me that I have changed. Because I haven't. I am just trying to work things out. Chosen Rogue: You're the same? Chosen Rogue: Ha Chosen Rogue: No you're not darkpryce: No...How long did you know me Faith? Tell me? darkpryce: Ask anyone darkpryce: They will tell you that I am the same darkpryce: Just more confused Chosen Rogue: Well I may not have known ou that long but I thought I *knew* you Chosen Rogue: I guess not darkpryce: No. darkpryce: YOu must not have darkpryce: Because I am the same darkpryce: I don't care you say. Chosen Rogue: I can see that darkpryce: I have always been insecure darkpryce: I have always been confused darkpryce: And thats the way it is. Chosen Rogue: Why would you be insecure? God Wes you're such a wonderful man . . . darkpryce: Because thats just the way it is. darkpryce: I was brought up to believe I would never be good enough...And I have carried it around my entire life. Chosen Rogue: You probably don't believe me when I say that you're the most amazing person I've ever met, do you? darkpryce: No. darkpryce: If I was amazing darkpryce: Would this be happening? Chosen Rogue: Wes no matter what's going on now - it doesn't affect my respect for you darkpryce: And I know you have always respected me.. Chosen Rogue: Not always maybe Chosen Rogue: but still, I have such respect for you you couldn't even imagine darkpryce: faith...I don't know...I just wish you could...understand why I am the way I am... Chosen Rogue: I can't and I guess I'm just going to have to accept that, huh? darkpryce: I guess so. Chosen Rogue: Can I ask you a question? darkpryce: I hope despite that we can still salvage some sort of a rfriendship darkpryce: Anything Chosen Rogue: Why do you think I'm acting the way I'm acting? darkpryce: I honestly don't know...I guess there are somethings I don't understand too... Chosen Rogue: I could tell you. But I don't. And you know why? Because I know it would make things even worse. darkpryce: You can tell me anything Faith Chosen Rogue: I still love you. And I cry every night because I'm not with you. It hurts so bad, I have this - hole deep inside - because you're gone, and I don't tell you this because it's not going to help and I probably shouldn't be telling you this now. darkpryce: Faith...I don't know what to say...I mean, I wish I could say the same...But I just...can't...I'm dorry. Chosen Rogue: See I know you can't say the same, and that's why it hurts more. Chosen Rogue: But don't be sorry Chosen Rogue: It's not your fault darkpryce: I just...This is what makes me realize that I have to go away for a few days...I fell so bad for hurting you...And making you angry...And getting angry. And not being here...It could help...Faith I want you to know...That even though I don't love you romantically...I care about you...A lot...And I want nothing more than for us to be okay again. Chosen Rogue: You know what I've come to realize? We can't. We can't be okay again. And I guess I'm just going to have to live with that darkpryce: Fine. If you want it that way Chosen Rogue: No Wes it's not how I want it at all. But it's just how it is darkpryce: If you want to stop even attempting a friendship then okay...We will\ Chosen Rogue: Wes what don't you understand about it not being what I want? Chosen Rogue: Look I got to go darkpryce: Okay. darkpryce: Maybe we'll talk again before I leave darkpryce: Bye ************ Damn Wes! Grr . . . I always cry during these things. Anyone think I should post the IM where they broke up? It's a tearjerker, I tell you. *sniffle* *glares at Topaz* *sobs* We were in love! Dammit! post comment

[01 Mar 2003|04:29am] [ mood | sleepy ] [ music | Tonight and the Rest of My Life - Nina Gordon ] Okay so Windows Movie Maker is a bitch. That's all I have to say about that. Updated You Get Me again. With part three of my wonderful partner-in-crime, Isabella Stardust's fic, which is completely brill. Was up talking to Tonya for a while. She's normally not on so late, so I was surprised, but yay! Hehe our new enemy? The evil font demon! It's a really long story . . . Right now I'm downloading an Angel-centric vid (though I think it may be Wes/Angel) to "Cowboy" by Kid Rock. How could I resist? My new favorite 'ship - Ambex! Because cherries are goooood. Hehe you SUers know what I'm talking about. Or maybe not. So I was thinking that I've completely gone insane. I've started to see subtexty goodness in Disney movies. Yes, *Disney* movies. I mean, there's something seriously wrong with me when I can't watch the Princess Diaries without thinking about the unrequited love of Mia and Lana. The scene with the ice cream on the cheerleading uniform?! Hello! Okay I think I'll go hide in my corner now. post comment

[28 Feb 2003|12:49am] Okay so Windows Movie Maker has a thing against Weda, 'cause I tried to save something completely random and it worked fine! GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!! *sigh* We broke up! Faith and Wes broke up! *sob* It was so sad! I cried! *sniffle* Hehe but Faith still has Fred which reminds me! Rebellious has been updated! As has You Get Me! Oh and everyone go join Ellie and Satine's new board, here! Everyone go join Dawn Love too and sign up for Secret Dawnie! Well I guess that's all for now, as I'm kinda busy talking to Willow . . . post comment

It's Official [26 Feb 2003|04:05pm] Windows Movie Maker hates me! I don't know what ever did to it, but it really doesn't want me to save this vid as a movie. Runtime error my ass! Anyone know what the hell a runtime error is? If you do, please comment and let me know. And if you know how to fix it, please please tell me! I'm ready to bash my computer in with a stick. Evil computer! Grr . . . post comment

So Sleepy [23 Feb 2003|06:43am] [ mood | sleepy ] I'm so sleepy. Been up all night once again, and *sigh* sleep would be good. My soft bed with all the pillows and just a little bit of rest and I'd be okay . . . *forces self to stay away* Okay so why am I forcing myself to stay awake? 'Cause I'm downloading some clips for my Weda vid - and I'm totally willing to not sleep for the good of Weda 'shippage. It's for the good of the world, really. If I make this Weda vid and it's decent enough, there will be no pain or war or hunger . . . this is me trying to be sarcasticly funny but failing miserably. This is me sleep deprived, which is quickly becoming my average state of being. Now I'm thinking about states of being and I just wanna lay down . . . just for a little bit. Okay so I'll try to stay awake and coherent (well as much as I normally am) to give you a brief update on the patheticness that is my life. Being 'shipped . . . with people. Me/Niki and me/Ellie are my personal favorites but me/Niu and me/Emily are quickly finding their own places in my warped shipper heart. Non-me 'ships I like? Topaz/Rach, Topaz/Tonya, Alex/OC, Ellie/Satine, Niki/Christine, Sky/Anna, Sky/Topaz . . . I could go on and on really. Gonna write a Topaz/Rach fic - have the first scene all written out already. Okay you may think that I've gone crazy right now, but I swear it's not just me. More info when my mind isn't all fuzzy and my eyelids aren't so heavy. Well the clip is at 40% and though I wanna write more I really can't right now. Will probably write later. P.S. 'Signs' - hehe the ending coulda been better, but as a whole it was a creepy good time 6 comments|post comment

Busy Busy Busy [21 Feb 2003|05:21am] [ mood | busy ] [ music | Vanessa Carlton - "Twilight" ] Hehe so much to write about. First of all, my heart, my soul, my obsession, my Weda site, has been updated with new fic, a new layout and everything. Check it out: You Get Me and go read the fic I added from Jennifer-Oksana, it's completely brill and completely hot: Ursula. *sigh* Weda is my passion - it's kinda scary that I'm this in love with such an unconventional 'ship. Em said that I'd probably die if they had a scene together. She's probably right. I've been making music videos, which is more fun and easier than I thought it would be. So far I have three: my first is a B/A vid to "Paradise" by Vanessa Carlton and it's basicly an examination of Buffy's psyche during season six from a B/A slant. It's my first, so it's not great, and the visuals are kind of repetitive, but I'm damn proud of it anyway. The next one I made is a dark Willow vid to "Not An Addict" by K's Choice and it's about Willow's magick addiction, obviously. My favorite of the three, definitely. There's only one cut that I just couldn't get quite right. *sigh* And then there's my newest one, my Fuffy vid to "I Think I'm Paranoid" by Garbage - just general Fuffyness really. Made for Alex - who doesn't have any sites for me to link you to or I totally would. To download any of my vids, go to Amberina's Buffyverse Music Videos. Speaking of the Fuffy vid, I showed it to my mother and my cousin. I asked my cousin what he thought it was about and his reponse was "lesbians" - hehe. I showed it to my mother who can't grasp the concept of slash beyond Willow/Tara and she's heard me go on and on about Fuffy TEXT but still doesn't believe even with my vid, which hello, Bronzing, forehead kissing, heart-on-windowing, ect. and you know what she had the nerve to say? That it was Faith being 'sarcastic' - *sigh* I know that's not the case, you know that's not the case, but she's living in denial land. Speaking of Faith, Toppie wants Faith and Fred to dump Wes because she says she's having issues with writing Wes happy so she needs angst, which I understand and get and want to help with, but there's a problem: we lurve him to pieces so I don't know how we're gonna manage it. Must talk to Rach about it tomorrow, get her take. I don't want them to break up but I want Toppie to be able to write Wes again - so I dunno what to do. Oh BTW, I'm currently trying to make a Weda video which is being difficult and I'd give up if it was any other couple - but it's *Weda* man and it deserves vids, damn good ones, and being the Weda freak that I am, I must oblige. But it's hard - *whimpers* Must. Make. Weda. Vid. Maybe I'll just make the Pervy vid first and then go back to the Weda vid - I dunno. *sigh* Wow is this my longest entry like ever? Hehe go me. Note to self: make a new layout for Blurty. What should I do? Weda? Hehe or something else? I'm not sure. Oh gotta pimp my new Dawn message board: Dawn Love - go join. Please? Oh and go check out Em's new layout at Blinded By the Light - Orgasms and Table-Breakage - lmfao. Hehe. This is it. Really. I'm gonna stop writing now. OMG I can't stop. Hehe okay really stopping now. I am. *sigh* All for now. *forces self to click the update journal button* 6 comments|post comment

[06 Feb 2003|07:55pm] [ mood | okay ] [ music | Brooks & Dunn - "A Man This Lonely" ] Okay yes I'm listening to country music . . . sue me. And am I crazy if this song reminds me of Wesley and Fred? Maybe so but still . . . I'm not writing just so you can laugh at my musical tastes. I'm not. There was something I wanted to write about, I'm sure of it. Dammit, I forget now. Maybe later. 1 comment|post comment

[06 Feb 2003|12:28pm] [ mood | grateful ] [ music | Leona Naess - "Charm Attack" ] I'm not gonna tell you any details because it's too fucking depressing and *I* try not to think about it . . . but let me just say this - I. Hate. My. Life. But it'll get better, I know it will because it *has* to get better. And all my friends online help me even if they don't realize it . . . all of them, all of you, you guys help so much. Thank you for that, it means more than you will ever know. 7 comments|post comment

Wow I'm Actually Updating! [04 Feb 2003|11:57am] [ mood | creative ] [ music | Bif Naked - "Lucky" ] It's been a while but I've been really busy. First of all with the roleplay . . . which has convinced that we're all on crack. Our rp has actually turned into a threesome . . . for the full scoop read Faith, Wesley, and Fred's journals. I want the threesome to work out . . . Faith and Fred both love each other and Wes but Wes is worried the women don't really love him and just want each other. Aww poor Wes . . . And then there's the music video I'm making. It's B/A with some B/S and it's to a Vanessa Carlton song . . . it's turning out really great so far, thanks to Rach and her scene gettng abilities. And thanks to Google which automaticly translates the German clip sites even if it does translate Angel as "fishing rod" - which, lmao, is pretty damn funny in some contexts. Like the summary for "Angel" says something like - "Buffy and fishing rod share thier first kiss, until Buffy realizes that fishing rod humans is not." How funny is that? And then there's the totally baffling fact that You Get Me did get into the BtVS Writers' Guild . . . which is happifying but . . . what? I was shocked. And I so know it was because I didn't care. If I was waiting around a wishing and hoping I so wouldn't have got in. Whatever. I should probably make a new layout for the site but I'm too busy and too lazy. And then I need to make Kathryn a layout for her RP journal . . . and I should already have it done but . . . things have come up, Real Life things which reminds me - REAL LIFE IS A BITCH. I guess that's all for now . . . hopefully I can find some time to write later. post comment

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