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The Diary of a Loner

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updating and outcoming [04 Jan 2005|07:04pm]
[ mood | horny ]
[ music | ryan cabrera- true ]

Alittle bit about myself:

Im Joe, age 16. lets leave it at that. And yes, im gay. I'm attracted to guys. Something that no one knows. Im just too afraid to tell anyone. i know people will treat me different, act in different ways. This is the reason i needed a journal. I've kept it in all this time and its hard to take it. I dream to much of being with a guy it kills me.

Im afraid to act. how to know whos straight and whose not. I mean im at school, and i cant control my thoughts as i stare at those hot guys in class. Then they notice and think that im weird. i must get at least 15 erections minimum during the day. and the only way i have to deal with it is to come home and pleasure myself fantasizing ymself being with them. its torture.

its too much. i mean, i get off at least 2 times a day. i just want a real person. a real visual. i would love nothing more than to give someone head, or do them in the ass. id definatly want to be a top, but at the same time dont want all the control. i just want to be able to kiss a guy all over their body. their neck, their nipples. their stomach and they legs. their ass and their balls.

thinking about it all right now, its killing me. i wish i could find someone who would keep my secret, but someone who will let me have my way. god its kills me.

ok i think thats enough for one entry

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