| hrmm. |
[29 Nov 2003|05:04pm] |
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(shine)PLAIN WHITE T'S |
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well, just incase any of you care... I thought I'd make an entry.
Me and tom have been going out for a week and a few days. *smiles* I like him a ton. He's really sweet and he makes me happy. Plus I can talk to him about alot of things that I can't tell some people.
Me and Ryan started talking yet again. And we are working on our friendship. He's changed alot. I'm proud of him. His sister sent me a bunch of silly yet cute pictures of him that make me laugh. I miss Ryan a ton. But I'm not gonna go back to him.. I can't. I can't hurt Tom and I can't let myself get hurt.
Um... Mike is coming out here soon! WHOOT! That makes me happy. Him and his girlfriend are breaking up cause him and his ex boyfriend kissed. Aww.. Oh well. Mike needs to be happy. I love that kid. he's the bestest.
Well, I'm out... I'm tired. Hungry and grumpy.
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| WOAH HO HO! |
[09 Nov 2003|11:03am] |
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(give it up)THE FORMAT |
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Well, things have changed. Ryan fucked me over, but oh well. Things happen. I met this really cute boy named Tom. He's nice. And he's completely different then most guys, atleast I think so. Umm... Me and Mike are talking again. He's coming out to MN this winter. I hope we can hang out. I miss Mike. He's a nice guy... Kinda depressing that we ever broke up. But he's happy now. And so am I. I just can't wait to see him... Goll, I remember me and him used to talk about being together later on in life. And how we used to swear that one day, we'd be in eachother's arms. I dont know what I'm gonna do when I see him... I'll probably start crying... v_v but yeah... So, umm. my life ain't that exciting. Sorry I never write in here anymore. G'bye.
<3courtni.
I can't explain what made me stay, I fall into the same mistakes. Like all good things, they never last. The past it past
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[24 Oct 2003|10:37pm] |
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(an end to a begining)COHEED AND CAMBRIA |
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Did you know I cried last night
While listening to our song
I'm terrified of that flight
I just want you to come along
It's gonna be so lonely without you there
But I guess I'll try to make it through
Lately you act like you don't care
That doesn't matter 'cause I love you
You don't know how much you mean to me
But I can't get you to change you mind
I need to stop believing
That in the end it'll all be fine
We both know this means alot
But you're with her and I'm alone
It feels like you forgot
All those nights we said "I'll love you forever" on the phone
Good-bye was always the hardest part
But it'll be okay, we'll move on
All our memories will be in my heart
Your touch is what I'll forever long
Good-bye
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[15 Oct 2003|02:10pm] |
I saw these lyrics in my friend's profile and I want to know who they are from.. please help!!!
I think in time I'll get by..That was the day I put your picture aside. Swallowed the fact that our dream had died.
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| This hate is fucking real... |
[09 Oct 2003|03:29pm] |
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FromAutumnToAshes |
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Does anyone know a good song about two people loving eachother then you start hating the other person because of the awful things they do to you? I've already told my ex to listen to Stupid Kid by Alk3 but he doesnt get it... Just something to show him that I really hate him now because of the horrible things he did... Thanks so much.
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| YAAY! |
[05 Oct 2003|01:42am] |
What would you say if I asked you not to go
To forget everyone, forget everything
and start over with me?
Would you take my hand and never let me go?
Promise me you'll never let me go
And now the stars aren't out tonight
but neither are we to look up at them
Why does hello feel like goodbye?
These memories can't replace
These wishes I wish and dreams I chase
Take this broken heart and make it right
I feel like I've lost everything when your gone
Left remembering what its like
To have you here with me
I thought you should know
You're not making this easy
I never thought I'd be the one to say
"Please don't, please don't leave me"
Take my hand and never let me go
Take my hand and never let me go
Promise me you'll never let go
Make this last forever
I so happy. I love Ryan. He's terrific.
Me and Star put holes through pokemon. it was groovy. We are making necklaces out of them tomorrow.
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| Well, thank goodness for the moa |
[30 Sep 2003|07:15am] |
I went to the moa with *Ryan*, Jess, and Joey. I'm as happy as a little fat kid with chocolate. Me and Ryan kissed... It was the best thing ever... He's so sweet. I can't wait until we see eachother again... Well, if you want to know the whole story then read my el-jay... www.livejournal.com/~letsgobowling00
Ryan is the bestest ever!!!!!!!!!!!!
<333
My sweet prince... without you, I'm nothing.
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| Atleast dreamers still dream... |
[17 Sep 2003|11:58pm] |
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OctoberNightsByYellowcard |
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I really want to be with RYAN... Ugh.. I hate that he's still caught up on his ex! I want it to be just me and him. His ex obviously hurt him in some way. I know I wont. I'll treat him with all respect and I'll show him what it's like to have a relationship that you dont want to let go of. I'll be a perfect girlfriend. I dont care how far away we live. I'll try to see him every weekend. I'll ride the bus to the MOA every weekend. He can stay at my house... I'll do anything. He's shown me so much in life. I've been in love before and I can tell that if we happen to make something out of the relationship we have already I may fall in love again... That would be so perfect too. With what I'm saying right now it's probably going to scare him off but I dont care. This is how I feel. He can like me still or not, I'll always like him. He's so great. If I have to go to his house tomorrow I will. Even tho he wouldnt be there... (heh) But I'm so serious about all this.
Ryan, if you happen to read this, which I doubt you will, please know that I will give the world to be with you. Every time we talk I start liking you 10 times more then I already do. You are the best thing that's happened to me in a long time. I can really truely say right now that if we went out it'd last way over 6 months because I'd never break up with you. That's how much I like you. I've never met someone as great as you. You dont need to drop to your knees and be with me... I just want you to know all of this... I'm just too scared to tell you to your face. Because I've always been afraid of rejection.
<333
"here's my heart I'll let you break it"
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| LiveJournal |
[17 Sep 2003|12:26am] |
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YELLOWCARD! |
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OKAY KIDS! I got a LJ now! WHEE HEE!
I wont be updating this as much... Probably sometimes but not alot...
www.livejournal.com/~letsgobowling00
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| Hi-C is my cure! WHEE HEE! |
[16 Sep 2003|06:18pm] |
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Sore, Scared, Worried |
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Oktober baybee! (bring back those AZ memroies!) |
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Well, i stayed home all day today... I sat around playing Ages Of the Empire 2 mostly. It was pretty boring.
I noticed that RYAN was online so I talked to him. I found out he's sick too. I hope he gets better. He's got a camping thing to go on on thursday.
Speaking of thursday. That's my birthday. And the one thing I want for my birthday is an effin boyfriend. Like that's going to happen. I hate being single.
Last night I talked to MIKEY. I think we are going to become friends again which is cool. He's got mono too. Poor him. It sucks!
JESSeCA, STARSHA and NICK might have mono also. STAR is coming home today. She was at Stout but she's sick. And she gets the week off, like me. So we are going to chill on the couches in our PJs all week. Come and join if you'd like.
STOP THAT RAMBLING!
<333
oh the sweet memories of you and I... Don't let these times pass us by
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| Me so tired. Oh so so tired. |
[14 Sep 2003|11:48pm] |
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Sore & Tired |
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BattleFeilds :: Fourbanger (lyrics shown tomorrow!) |
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WELL!!! i'm going to sleep early for a change. it's 11:50 and I'm dead tired... SO YEAHHH!!
RYAN said he's going to try to stay home from school tomorrow. I hope he does, otherwise I'm going to be sooooo bored... I like him so much. WHEE HEE! he's so sweet and so caring!!
RYAN > you
. ^_^
WEEEEEEEEEEELLL! i'm going to sleep now... Just thought I'd adnounce all of that. OH! and TIM is being nice to me. He's actually ACTING like he cares... (i repeat, ACTING) which is cool i suppose...
Well, g`night!
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| Hrmm... |
[14 Sep 2003|08:08pm] |
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Audio Karate |
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Yes... Well, I like RYAN a-lot and can not stop thinking about him. I dont want to give up because if I do something good may have happened and I wouldnt get to find out because I would have gaven up. Plus that's what everyone is expecting me to do... ::sigh:: things are difficult.
STARSHA and NICK got home as I was watching Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas in my dad's room and STAR joined me. We were all covered up in our blankies. it was cute. Then we got a flash light and looked in eachother's throats. STAR has little white spots at the back of her throat too. I have huge spots on the back of mine! it sucks!
today I sat around until about 6ish, then we went and got some food. It was hard for me to eat. I might have to get my tonsoles (spl?) taken out. That would suck bum. My goodness. BAHHH!
Everyone better come and visit me in the hospital! LOL!
Meh... I like RYAN soooo much. I talk about him too much too. I tell everyone about him. I really wish I would have gotten to talk to him on Friday but I would have sounded so funny. And not like myself. I'll call him when I get better and actually sound normal.
Well, I'm going to go... I dont think I'm going to school tomorrow... So if you want then call me!!
<333
corki
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| woah...CHANGE OF HEART! |
[13 Sep 2003|11:10pm] |
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Senses Fail--- just about every song |
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suicidekiller14: your ugly:-)
im an eSKAmo: thank you hunni, you are too
that makes me feel special.. it was supposibly Ali. BAHH! i dont care tho.. I thought I'd share that. HEEHEE!
ANYWHO! I think I'm giving up on the whole Ryan thing... I like him SOO much but he likes me and other people... I have NO chance.. these girls are older, prettier (im guessing), and live by him. I should have known this.. BAHH
I wish that he would just be with ME.. I know it sounds stubborn and unbelievable but yeah... I just want someone to be there for me and hold me and stuff... And that would be fantastic if that someone could be RYAN but I dont think he'd want it to be him... ::sigh::
No one knows how much I like him. I'd do alot for that kid if not anything! He's so great. He makes me smile when I'm sad and he takes my mind of everything. When I'm talking to him I concentrate on our conversation. Sometimes I wont talk to anyone while I'm talking to him... it's weird.. And if I talk to that person I usually end up talking about RYAN.
No, I'm not obsessed. He just seems unbelievable. He's so great in every way but he likes me, it's like something is bound to screw up and knowing me I'm going to just sit back and let it happen. OBVIOUSLY that's what I'm starting to do...
I hate reading his online journal and hearing about all these other girls he likes... It makes me feel like I should just give up and stop trying to be with guys period... BAHH! well, I'm going to stop complaining... I'll let you all know about how this goes... I really like him alot but I have no chance... So I'm giving up... GOOD NIGHT PEOPLE!
<333
corki
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| GET UP OFF THAT THANG! bahhh! |
[13 Sep 2003|10:19pm] |
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Sore & Sick, yet happy! |
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Hand Guns and Second Chances :: Senses Fail |
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WELL KIDS!
Friday night I went to the football game at LHS. It was really boring. But I talked to BECCA some and I met NIKKI. Which was tizzle. But I looked like shit! NIKKI probably thinks I'm some drity slob! TAAHAA!
TH-OMAS called RYAN from his cellular divice but I didnt get to talk, plus I sounded like shit so oh wells!! I wish RYAN could have been there. Everyone would have been oh so jealous cause I'd have the most sweetest, respectful, cutest guy there!! TEEHEE! Oh how much I do adore that kid. I like him so much!
Hrmm... well, after the game we walked to MADY's house to get her stuff. Her geetar is purty nice but I like the one I want the mostest. Plus the one I want is a bass geetar so yeeeeeeeeeah.... After that we got a ride to KELSEY's house where we all ordered pizza, told stories and had 6 or 7 mad orgies. We all passed out before 1am. It was C-R-A-Z-Y!!
Well, I'm awefully sick and sore so i think I'm going to end this. But I wish RYAN would get online... I miss talking to him even tho I talked to him for awhile yesterday!!!!
5 days!?!?!
<333
This smile is fake and so are you. ENJOI!
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| Ba dumm dumm! |
[12 Sep 2003|07:42pm] |
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Musy Love Song : Tsunami Bomb (courtni is happy again!) |
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I LIKE RYAN TONS AND TONS AND TONS AND TONS! oh me oh my. I want to go out with him so bad and I was debating on whether or not to ask him out but I dont ask guys out. SO NO! lol. We basically act like we are going out anyways, We just dont have those stupid lables and stuff like that. Well, RYAN makes me the happiest girl ever. I'm going to brag about how absolutly great he is ALL night! gollie do i like him alot!!!
Well, I gotta go to the game... BYE GUYS!!
RYAN_i'm yours no matter what! I <3 you soooo much! your great! I'll talk to you saturday night! love yahs!
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| teehee heh |
[12 Sep 2003|03:38pm] |
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The Sound Of My Own... SCREAMS! no... BLOOD! (huh?) |
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I'll catch your tears! OH YES I WILL! ::cries:: AHHH! ::moves out of the way:: CRY BITCH CRY! and you better like it!
STARKY says "Just tell him he looks like a gay Hanson brother"
(Hi) Do I look like someone who would date you? (I never said that, I just said Hi) Well, I didnt!!! dont lie to me. you are just trying to look good. bahh, you look like your gay. and your gay because you are skinny. Wait a minute. I'm sorry.
CORKI says "I've got a pussy between my legs? Anyone hungry?"
Okay, I'm done guys... I need to go shower
I wuv Ryan with all my little <3! (huh?) KISS KISS FOR RYAN!!! haha
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| ....you want the truth?! |
[12 Sep 2003|10:40am] |
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my throat hurts like a bitch! |
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NO MORE CATCH 22!!! okay. i lied.. it's Keasby Nights (spl?) |
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Well, the truth is, you could slit my throat... and with my one last gasping breath I'd apoligize for bleeding on your shirt.
haha, i remember when everyone would put that in their profile.... It was funny. And I admitt, I had it in there once or twice, but HEY i like that band... teehee heh
Well, I got my way and I stayed home from school today... lol. YAAY! My throat hurts like a bitch tho. But I'm still going to the game and to Kelsey's afterwards. If you wanna hear something REALLY funny then listen to the way I talk. It cracks even ME up! haha
I wanted RYAN to get online so I could tell him that I'm not going to be able to chit-chat with him tonight... BAHHH!! RYAN, if you see this then you will now know that I'll talk to you on Saturdee... OKIE! teehee...
Speaking of RYAN, I like him sooooooo much. I really am completely done with TIM this time... I'm not going back to him. He just hurts me. And tells me things I dont want to hear. I dont think he cares about my feelings at all. RYAN on the other hand is so sweet and he always tells me nice things about myself. He's anything a girl would ever ask for. and he likes me and I like him...YAAY! satan & jesus for ever! yEEah man!
well, guys I noticed that I have been just blabbing on so I mise well stop...
I'll write how everything went in a few days... I'm going to miss talking to RYAN... =(
<333
tons and tons of hot sexy love for... jesus lol! oh and for cassie and jessEca and becca... they are my girls. Plus cassie is my girlfriend.
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| TIME FOR A CHANGE |
[11 Sep 2003|11:38pm] |
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CAPDOWN |
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I used to think the way u looked determined how u feel,
But can't u see I've tried to change
I'm not so sure of how i feel but now I know that I'm for real,
My anger still lies deep inside.
Stop waiting for tomorrow,
Peace, Unity, togetherness,
Just misery and sorrow,
If we just keep waiting for tomorrow.
My views have changed, I'm not ashamed of what i have become,
Progressions is a source of life.
If everybody stays the same a world of conflict and distain will deny us of our future goals.
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| Why would I get screwed over by two guys in a week before my bday? I SUCK! |
[11 Sep 2003|06:42pm] |
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sore, sad, upset |
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i dont know... ::sigh:: |
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Well, courtni FINALLY thought she could be happy again... because she liked RYAN so much BUT she just read his online journal and it says he likes someone else. YAAY FOR ME!
ugh.. i hate this shit. I fall in love then get screwed over... then I start liking someone so much to the point where I actually smile again and I find out he likes someone else A WEEK BEFORE MY EFFIN BIRTHDAY!
This Birthday is going to suck so much ass. I can't believe this is happening to me. I just want to leave MN... Obviously I'm not good enough for TIM or RYAN so I'm giving up.
But... GiR!! I like RYAN so much... You people do not understand how much I like him! He's changed the way I am so much and if he goes out with that girl im going to be so sad...
I hope things change... I'd do alot to go out with RYAN... He told me he's not going to date any girls from Mound anymore cause they all cheat and lie and all they want is sex... Why do guys not care about girl's feelings?!?!?!
I can't stand any more of this shit... I'm just going to go be all sad-like
RYAN× if you read this, I just want you to know that I'm sorry that I dont live in Mound and only want sex... I really did think you liked me alot... But I should have thought twice, I now know that I'm never going to be good enough for anyone.
TIM and RYAN, thanks for ruining my birthday....
--corki-
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