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murdoch has funny stitches on his belly. i wish i knew what they were for. [13 Oct 2006|12:49am] [ mood | content ] [ music | nick drake ] tea studio today was amazing. also, really difficult. the way we have to sit (seiza) hurts so incredibly badly. sensei says "the pain never goes away, but part of zen is learning not to be controlled by your pain." my favorite part of the whole thing is the greeting which you have to do before every tea session. you take out this fan and place it in front of you, bow to the host and say in japanese "please take care of me." the fan symbolizes the wall that people put around themselves, in the form of vanity or anxiety or whatever, and everything that people must get past in order to truly understand one another. it symbolizes everything that you, as an individual, need to let go of in order to truly connect. as sensei said, tea ceremony is about relationships. okay, enough about tea ceremony. i feel like such a tool talking about it all the time, but it is the light of my life right now. we are having a BIG keg party at my house this friday night, which i will be late to because of bob dylan. i am not sure how this is going to go down. i am mildly frightened. i'm going back to my doctor on monday morning, who i have avoided for the better part of a year. should be awkward, or something, but i am happy about it. also, i'm going to betsuin temple for the first time on sunday. i am beyond excited. now, off to practice seiza for 30 minutes. post comment

update [06 Sep 2006|12:54pm] [ mood | content ] i don't have the internet at my house yet (and attempts to steal wireless from the neighbors have proved futile) but everything is great over there. only 2 of my other roommates have moved in so far (the two i didn't know at all beforehand) and they are really nice. the house is beautiful. i have started working the night shift at work again. it is a strange change from the 9-5 for sure. i guess that's about it. if anyone wants to come visit just give me a call, my house is really easy to find. 4 comments|post comment

[05 Sep 2006|12:24pm] we had to put winston to sleep today. everyone rushed to the animal hospital so he had his whole family with him. 1 comment|post comment

reminder. [03 Aug 2006|09:14pm] so i have a little post it note above my frog tank, and it says: "reminder: you are leaving your job on september 5th." september 5th is when i move into my new house. september 5th is, hopefully, when the cord will be cut. before then, i have a few things to do. one of which is finally sending the letter i wrote to my CEO. the other is training my replacement. so that's real mad exciting news, yo. post comment

i move out september 1st. [30 Jul 2006|07:19pm] [ mood | confused ] [ music | judy and the dream of horses - b&s ] so my dad and brother for some reason thought it would be hilarious to put a bunch of dead bees in my sink. note the lone dead spider. 4 comments|post comment

[23 Jul 2006|12:20am] This wednesday we are all eating at Chantanee around 8 possibly with sutton. a sort of goodbye nicola, hellooo david thing. assuming he can make it. and that you guys can written by nicola. 5 comments|post comment

heck fest photos [17 Jul 2006|12:44am] ( are here ) post comment

may i introduce you to... [16 Jul 2006|11:33pm] [ mood | excited ] my new bike! 1968 schwinn collegiate. i haven't named it yet. 2 comments|post comment

KNW YR OWN, guys. [16 Jul 2006|01:30pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | adrian orange ] what the heck fest was amazing. k records makes me laugh, just because they are so adorable. highlights include: covered wagon camping, nightly campfires with black dice playing on stereo despite alan's protesting, driving around at 12 mph in downtown anacortes making bubbles out the window, exploring mt. erie, shipwreck day, 'top 5 things to do post-apocalypse' lists, playing tag with a couple of seven year olds, collecting rocks from the beach at deception pass, blowing bubbles off the bridge over the pass, white wine and hard cider, calvin johnson putting on a rainydawg pin, khaela of the blow making an accordion out of our rainydawg bumper sticker, the BEET HAPPENING sandwich, the ridiculously awesome DIY feel of everything, running into UW kids, "commercial avenue", the locals, "how much would it take for you to..." hypotheticals, the motorcycle gang, jason anderson singing to us from the chair when we arrived, etc. etc. we came late too, we didn't even get to go to the dinner or the friendship trail or any of that and it was still wonderful. next year i am definitely going again. good clean fun with good kids. i loved it. post comment

OFFICIAL [13 Jul 2006|12:26am] [ mood | ecstatic ] http://www.amath.washington.edu/~kutz/romeinfo.html i absolutely can't wait! 2 comments|post comment

[27 Jun 2006|05:21pm] [ mood | dreamy ] [ music | arterial - rachel's ] larry brilliant [head of google.org, google's philanthropic organization] is amazing. i just read an article about him in wired magazine and many of the things i plan to do with my life he has already done. he is definitely my current professional role model. work is going well, despite last week's issues. i am more comfortable in my managerial role, and also i feel more at ease being vocal to my superiors about the sales issue. before i leave the company i plan on doing some research on various alternatives to the commission-based sales system that we currently use, and writing a lengthy letter to andy mack, CEO. it may be silly, but i care about the company because i am invested in it (not literally, yet) and i think a few minor changes could really help it become even more successful while still taking good care of its employees and others who are indirectly affected by the company's success. the playground magazine is running smoothly so far. our website is up, but there isn't any content or design yet. bookmark playgroundmagazine.net though, content will appear in a few weeks! i think i'll end up in geneva someday, at least for a little while. i don't know. also possibly india. i am a silly girl, i get excited easily. post comment

magazine update [25 Jun 2006|11:35am] [ mood | excited ] the playground magazine is coming along so well. chris, jake and i met at the trabant chai lounge on 45th and brooklyn [my new favorite coffee place] last night and we got so much done. chris is mr. manager because he has tons of experience [GM of rainydawg radio...] and jake is the graphics editor. we also have a webmaster, travis, who is making/hosting our new website because he is awesome. our planning wiki is: http://playgroundmagazine.pbwiki.com/ i love wikis. let me know if you want the password so you can edit it if you are interested in working with us. cheers! post comment

a weekend! [24 Jun 2006|10:45am] [ mood | relieved ] [ music | lovers who uncover - the little ones ] so in the sober light of day, by which i mean post-slumber and waking up naturally without an alarm clock, i feel better about what happened. i think what i really needed was a day off. a day where i don't have to first think "what can i put on that is appropriate for work," but rather "WHAT THE HECK DO I WANT TO WEAR, MOTHERFUCKER?!!?!" a day where i can take my time at things and not worry about beating rush hour traffic to get somewhere on time. and, most importantly, a day where i am not expected to sell anything to anyone. i think i want to plan a trip to somewhere exciting in september. maybe new york city? i don't know, that sounds exciting to me. anyone in? so, here's to the weekend. may it be wonderful and joyous and not terribly stressful. may there be adventure and light, happiness and friendship. i would like to recharge. strawberry festival, garage sales, spending time with my nephew, yoga, etc. it will be nice. 2 comments|post comment

a catalog of the past week or so [22 Jun 2006|08:47pm] [ mood | exhausted ] [ music | we used to vacation - cold war kids ] highlights: new position at work going really well, tapes 'n tapes concert, hanging out with sima & justin, economics class, making awesome new friends from economics class, starting to work in earnest on the magazine, legos in the park with nathan and brittany, an awesome paycheck, running from the park patrol with jake and birdie, falling asleep right away every night when i finally came home lowlights: my mother not seeming to care if i exist or not, missing my boyfriend a ridiculous amount, being tired/sick/moody from working a lot, creepy old guy who asked me to coffee at work here's to a good weekend. radio show, more magazine stuff, rainydawg party? who knows. no work though. post comment

i think it will be called "the playground." [17 Jun 2006|10:34pm] [ mood | excited ] [ music | through the glow - laura veirs ] so i want to start a little magazine with ames, jake, and whoever else. the point of it is to explore the idea of community, artistic and otherwise, and perhaps create one where none exists by pushing our ideas, and ourselves, blindly out into the world. also, it will provide us a creative outlet and allow us to develop and share our worldview. yeah, i'll get back to you on the mission statement, it's a bit fuzzy. i want it to be characterized by a perhaps uncomfortable honesty. BUT, it is going to be fabulous! if anyone wants to submit stories, political writings, photos, drawings, collages, cartoons, musings on daily life, diatribes, poems, letters, quotes, etc. etc. etc. let me know, please. it will probably just be distributed to awesome local coffee shops and what not, so no pressure. our first planning meeting will be either this thursday or friday, 5:30pm-7:30pm depending on everyone's schedules. draft of first cover. made by jake, of course. 9 comments|post comment

she fell in love with the drummer, another then another [11 Jun 2006|08:30pm] [ mood | curious ] [ music | heavy metal drummer - wilco ] starting a 401K = awesome! i have new ideas for the future after today. 1 comment|post comment

back home. [10 Jun 2006|02:56am] i miss where i was before i went to college, and i miss where i was at college, and i don't want to be where i am now. that seems to be the pattern. it will be better in a few weeks when things start to make more sense though. i will get used to it and recent events will become memories and life will go on. so instead of a litany of complaints i will change my mind about later, i am going to try to embrace the concept of momentum. and about you. i don't know. yeah, i'm hurt. who wouldn't be. congratulations if that was your intention. post comment

40s at gasworks park [07 Jun 2006|10:58pm] [ mood | drunk ] we rolled down the hill. it felt like first quarter. so sad. i will miss it. i love these people. my room is packed up. i am alone. freshman year of college is over. it was an absolutely wonderful and worthwhile adventure. i have learned so much. post comment

finals are no fun. [02 Jun 2006|08:40pm] [ music | the light - mirah with the black cat orchestra ] i woke up yesterday morning in the middle of a dream where i was trying to "use vectors to find god." that is the only phrase i remember from the dream, but i also remember that it wasn't really working out for me. in another dream i was managing some sort of fast-food tea beverage serving establishment and everything was going wrong, and some girl tried to fill a plastic garbage bag full of hot water and it burst and spilled all over her and the floor. not a very restful sleep. it will be over soon, and then i will be officially done with intro math and intro chem, and murdoch and i will head home! post comment

happy birthday alexander james! [31 May 2006|01:54pm] [ mood | ecstatic ] [ music | this year - the moutain goats ] this baby is a big thing for my family. for my sister, it is the end of a 3 year nightmare. to me, it represents a shift between generations. this baby is the first new person to come into our family in a long time, so it seems like it is just the beginning of what will probably be a long streak of newness and expansion and change. my siblings and i are slowly inheriting the world from our parents. it is exciting and scary. this kid is going to be so spoiled because he is the first of it, too. i hope he knows how much love he has been born into. i hope he never feels lonely. i hope he never has to doubt that he has a caring family behind him. and while a new baby is perhaps one of the most wonderful, uplifting things that can happen, everything else right now is emotionally draining. finals, moving out, leaving friends, leaving my roommate, planning, growing up, moving on. it is hard to focus on the wonderful things that moving onward will bring when you are so scared. i have hope that everything will work out, though. i have planned so that the immediate future will make me as happy as i am now and sometimes that is the best you can do. in the words of the mountain goats, "i am going to make it though this year, if it kills me." love you guys. 3 comments|post comment

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