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mood |
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 cynical |
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music |
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forget everything - new found glory |
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Can we pretend for one second that we are together,
What's the point of keeping my feelings at bay,
It takes alot of me,
To get the nerve to wake up,
Everyday,
And what if I don't,
Would you even care,
Would you even care,
Forget everything that we have done,
Erase me,
From your memory,
Don't call,
Don't ask about me until the day hell freezes over,
I can't remember the last time I saw you smile,
It might have been around this time last year,
It takes alot of me,
To get the nerve to tell you everything is ok,
And what if I don't,
Would you even care,
Would you even care,
Forget everything that we have done,
Erase me,
From your memory,
Don't call,
Don't ask about me until the day hell freezes over,
It's gone,
Before you know it,
You can't let go of something you've never had,
It's ash until you burn it,
I hope I never see you again,
And what if I don't,
Would you even care,
Would you even care,
Forget everything that we have done,
Erase me,
From your memory,
Don't call,
Don't ask about me until the day hell freezes over,
When hell freezes over
welp i feel like my whole entire body is shutting down on me...and i hate it. i'm so weak and tired it's an effort to type, walk, talk, even write my name at the top of my papers in school. but i geuss its somthing i have to deal with. my dad thinks i should go to the hospital. yeah right. i hate it there...i dunno....maybe...i mean if they can take the pain away...just maybe i'll go...
ehhh stuff i need to get out of my hair:
*listening*
cheeks bright red, i feel like i'm on fire
how could you be the perfect liar?
you can't see these frayed ends
i can't keep playing pretend
this life is lack of honesty
i wish it were just you and me
time and time the days grow long
i wonder if this talk is wrong
i should have listened
*nightfall*
last night i went out on my deck
and looked up at the sky
a tear ran down my cheek
and i asked the stars why?
no answer was heard
at least not that night
but in my dreams
i saw a light
it led me to help
and it took all my fears
now i can be with you
and cry no more tears
*not yet*
how come when you pass me by everything slows down.
your the only thing i can clearly see.
and you look perfect to me.
how come i can't breath when you walk by me.
my heart stops but i'm still living.
and this feeling isn't bad.
though i still don't have you yet.
i wish i could let go of fears
and let you wipe away the tears
i can't hold on to the past, any longer
not much longer
i can't see anything but you.
and all i think about is you.
how could i ever been so fooled,
by somthing as wonderfull as you?
i wish i could let go of fears
and let you wipe away the tears
i can't hold on to the past, any longer
not much longer [x1]
i've forgotten how to breathe
can you show me how?
*right now*
i'm tired and i miss you.
i wish i could fall asleep with you.
i'd run 1, 000 miles in the freezing rain just to see you.
i wish i could be with you every second.
i think i'll turn off the lights now.
i think i'll lock the door now.
and curl up in my bed thinking of you.
how much i want you.
i need to be with you.
how much i wish i could be with you right now.
*suffocating letters* -->sounds better when sung
i'm sitting here
all alone
curled up on my coach
wondering
wondering if you've ever wanted out
like i want
right now
and these cold
cold and lonley nights
when i'm begging for your arms
and i've wanted you for so long
but when i come close
somthing goes wrong
and i'm thinking of letting you
take the chances and
make romances
i'm thinking that i'll wait
cause you're worth the wait
you've always been and
always will be
but i'm still screaming for your arms
cause i'm so cold
so cold
that i can't feel
anymore
and i need to hear your voice again
so i can exhale
cause i've been holding my breath
this whole time
it's been a long time
and now i'm suffocating
waiting
waiting for your arms
cause i need them
more than ever
right now
*The Perfect Drug* -->won in a contest recentley and is going into the finals for another.
You're my perfect drug.
You make me happy.
You make me smile.
And every second with you,
Is worth while.
You're my perfect drug.
I can't get you off my mind.
And when you talk i can't breath.
To me the distance will never matter.
I promise you i will never leave.
You're my perfect drug.
And i got addicted a long time ago.
I'd run 1,000 miles in the rain,
Just to fall asleep in your arms.
You are a blessing to me.
And when i'm with you i feel safe from harm.
You're my perfect drug.
And i would die without you.
*the following are from books and movies*
-Pain- ^book^
nobody in their right mind should ever put anyone in such a great amount of pain. the kind of pain that picks at the back of your knees all day, untill you finally fall. the kind of pain where your insides tare making your tears and sweat come out bloody. the kind of pain where everyone can see it in your eyes. everyone can see your suffering just from looking into your eyes. and you stare daggers even when not meaning to. you can't help it. because the pain you have gone through....is the ultimate pain...nobody in their right mind should ever put anyone in such a great amount of pain....
.l.i.a.r.
.t.h.i.e.f.
.m.u.r.d.e.r.e.r.
now it's your turn to die...
-sally's song- ^movie^
I sense there's something in the wind
That feels like tragedy's at hand
And though I'd like to stand by him
Can't shake this feeling that I have
The worst is just around the bend
And does he notice my feelings for him?
And will he see how much he means to me?
I think it's not to be
What will become of my dear friend?
Where will his actions lead us then?
Although I'd like to join the crowd
In their enthusiastic cloud
Try as I may, it doesn't last
And will we ever end up together?
no, I think not, it's never to become
For I am not the one
- sally from the nightmare before christmas
-she told you so- ^show^
keep your head up high
look towards the sky
out of the clouds
an angle falls
catch her
she thanks you
with angle dust
and a trip for two
she trys to make you
foget your troubles
but still you miss your love...
go back home...
she told you so...
-scream- ^movie^
look at you, crying....moping. like you don't have anything!god! you have everything! look at your cloths your shoes your makeup and hair! lok in your wallet hun, those aren't ones those are hundreds. look at your friends and boyfriend! you aren't alone. they all love you. they all care about you and you know it. and they show it. your family....god they love you and care about you take care of you...and they have the fucking money to buy you whatever your cold spoiled heart wants. you think you got it bad. look at other people in this fucking world. look at me....i'm one of those people you have more than. you have so much more than. i envy you and you spit at the sight of me. just because your family loves you and you have money and no one dares to spread rumors about you doesn't make you any better than me. *clapping* whispers:thank you
tears filled with lies ^upcoming book(not yet published)^
"there's a secret she hides" angel
"and that is...." cory
"for every lie she's been told she makes a mark. a scar. on her arm. she leaves herself a note. to never believe those who have betrayed her. those who have lied to her, right to her face..."
"...and we both know that she's been lied to countless times."
"exactley. and now that you've done this.....this lie. it's so terrible that it tears her insides and makes her look even more fake.thats why she does it. to make sure she is still real. you lied to her, and now she'll push harder this time....down her wrists. and we both can't save her. "
**the follogin are from songs*
green day
....i am one of those melow dramatic fools
nerotic to the bone no doubt about it
sometimes i give myself the creeps
sometimes my mind plays tricks on me...
silvershair
please die, ana
for as long as you're here
we're not
you make the sound of laughter
and sharpened nails seem softer
and i need you now somehow
and i need you now somehow
the used
should've done something but I've done it enough
by the way your hands were shaking
rather waste some time with you
should've said something but I've said it enough
by the way my words were faded
rather waste some time with you
wast some time with you
dashboard confessional
you can't fake it hard enough to please
everyone or anyone at all.
and the grave that you refuse to leave
the refuge that you built to flee
the places that you've come to fear the most.
cursive
oh please mister
can't you fix me? can't you fix me?
someone, anyone
won't you fix me? won't you fix me?
limp bizkit
oh i geuss it would be nice
if i could touch your body
i know not everybody
has got a body like me
but i gotta think twice
before i give my heart away
and i know all the games you play
cause i play them too
oh but i need some time off from that emotion
time to pick my heart up off the floor
when love comes down without devotion
well it take a strong man baby
but i'm showing you that door
but i got have faith
gotta have faith
baby, i know your asking me to stay
stay, please please please don't go away
cause you're giving me the blues
fiona apple
...so what would an angel say?
the devil wants to know...
letters to cleo
i wish you well
couldn't you tell after all these years?
i wish you well
a life in the world that you're that your dreaming of
i wish you well
i wish you well
i wish myself all of the above
what made me think
that i could survive all the wear and tear?
it's not my thing
to stand here and pose for some william-tell
i wish you well
i wish you well
i wish myself all of the above
if there was a better time i could not find it
it's mines not yours and yours not mine
and we couldn't hide it
don't take me on a ride with you
it's a roller coaster
fiona apple
...but no matter what i try
you break me with your bitter lies
so, call me crazy
hold me down
make me cry
get off now, baby
it won't be long
'till you'll be lyeing,
limp, in your own hands
dashboard confessional
breath deeply from this envelope
it smells like you
and i can't be without that scent
it's filling me
with all you mean to me....
evanesence
please please fogive me
but i won't be home again
maybe oneday you'll woke up
and barley conciuose you'll say to no one
isn't somthign missing?
you won't cry for my absecne i know
you forgot me long ago
am i that unimportant
am i so insignificant
isn't somthing missing?
isn't someone missing me?
even though i'd be sacrificed
you won't try for me, not now
and thoguh i'd die to know you love me
i'm all alone
isn't somthign missing?
isn't someone missing me
pelase please forgive me
but i won't be home again
i know what you do to yourself
shutter deep and cry out
isn't somthing missing?
isn't someone missing me
the used
look in my e y e s
i'm jaded now
whatever that means.
slpiknot
You all stare, but you'll never see
There is something inside me
dashboard confessional
i'm dyeing to know.
do you do you.
like dreaming of things so impossible.
or only the practicul.
or ever the wild.
and waiting threw all your bad bad days
just to end them with someone you care about
and do you like making out
and long drives and brown eyes
and guys that just don't quite fit in
yeah, do you like them.
dashboard confessional
i begged you not to go
i begged you, i pleaded
claimed you as my only hope
and watched the floor as you retreated
i begged you not to go
i begged you i pleaded
claimed you as my only hope
and watched the floor as you retreated
does it comfort you to know you faught the good fight?
basking in your victory. hollow and alone.
you'll boast your bitter braggin rights
to anyone who'll listen
cursive
So cry yourself to sleep
Cry yourself to sleep
'Cause I am strong and you are weak
Wait, you are strong, and I am weak
Fuck -- just cry yourself to sleep
box car racer
i faintly remember breathing
on your bedroom floor
where i layed and told you
but you swear you love me m o r e
do you care if i
don't know what to say
will you sleep tonight
or will you think of me
will i shake this off, pretend it's all ohkay
that there's someone out there
who feels just like me
there is.
those notes you wrote me
i've kept them all
i've given alot of thought
of how to write you back this fall
with every single letter
in every single word
there will be a hidden message
about a boy that loves a girl
green day
it's somthing --> [unpredictable]
but in the end it's right
i hope you had the time of your life.
dashboard confessional
and sooner or later this cold its gunna break and our hands will be warm again and all i want is not to need you now and sooner or later this cold its gunna break so our words wil be heard again and i all i need are vows of silence now.
yellowcard
hello friend,
it's been to
l
o
n
g
and every town
sings the same s a d
song*
shit i was board. those are all from my away messages haha. well i'm off to sleep now. or at least to try.
_-love always-_
*~/x your broken pumpkin
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awake
lonely
accomplished
uncomfortable
scared