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Everyone who reads this will most likely know what it is about. [13 Jan 2004|09:15pm] [ mood | lethargic ] [ music | Blindside ~ pitiful ] We sent out the SOS call. It was a quarter past four in the morning when the storm broke our second anchor line. Four months at sea, four months of calm seas only to be pounded in the shallows off the tip of Montauk Point. They call then rogues, they travel fast and alone. On hundred foot faces of God's good ocean gone wrong. What they call love is a risk, cause you will always get hit out of nowhere by some wave and end up on your own. The hole in the hull defied tthe crews attempts to bail us out. And flooded the engines and radio and half buried bow. Your tongue is a rudder. It steers the whole ship. Sends your words past your lips or keeps them safe behind your teeth. But the wrong words will strand you. Come off course while you sleep. Sweep your boat out to sea or dashed to bits on the reef. The vessel groads the ocean pressures its frame. Off the port I see the lighthouse through the sleet and rain. And I wish for one more day to give my love and repay debts. But the morning finds our bodies washed up thirty miles west. They say that the captain stays fast with the ship through still and storm. But this ain't the Dakota, adnt the water is cold. We won't have to fight for long. This is the end. This story's old but it goes on and on until we dissappear. Calm me and let me taste the salt you breathed while you were underneath. I am the one who haunts your dreams of mountains sunk below the sea. I spoke the words but never gave a thought to what they all could mean. I know that this is what you want. A funeral keeps both of us apart. You know that you are not alone. Need you like water in my lungs. This is the end. "I felt so alone, so empty. It seemed like being filled with blackness and evil was better than being filled with nothing at all. life was so painful that it couldn't have been worse if I had been covered with boils & burns from my head to my feet. No one who has not been there can possibly understand" - Timothy Michael Woodcipp 10 Fall like parachutes

Something I found in one of Tim's Journals. [10 Jan 2004|02:32am] [ mood | sad ] [ music | Nothing. ] why can't i be what you need a new improved version of me but i'm nothing so good, no i'm nothing just bones, a lonely ghost burning down songs of violence, of love, and of sorrow i beg for just one more tomorrow where you'll hold me down, fold me in deep, deep, deep in the heart of your sins i break in two over you i break in two and each piece of me dies only you can give the breath of life but you don't see me, you don't. here i'm pinned between darkness and light bleached and blinded by these nights where i'm tossing and tortured til dawn by you, visions of you then you're gone the shock bleeds the red from my face when i hear someone's taking by place how could love be so thoughtless, so cruel when all, all that i did was for you i break in two over you i break in two and each piece of me dies only you can give the breath of life but you don't see me, you don't i break in two over you i break in two and each piece of me dies only you can give the breath of life but you don't see me, you don't i break in two over you, over you i would break into for you now you see me, now you don't now you need me, now you don't.. 3 Fall like parachutes

[08 Jan 2004|04:35pm] [ mood | depressed ] So..I've been really out of it for the last week and half. Yesterday was one of the hardest days of my entire life. The memorial service was... so hard for me. I don't even want to talk about it at all, theres nothing more for to me say, I feel like theres nothing for me to do anymore at all. I can't explain these feelings that I'm having. I wish they'd go away, So that's why I'm leaving. I'm going to Mexico City for a week or so, Then I'm going to a town in southern california to see my brother and his wife. Hopefully I'll be able to go online. But I need to get away from everything. For the first time in my entire life I feel like I want to die. I hate it. I'm hurting so bad right now and there is nothing that anyone can do. I don't even know what to do for myself. Nothing makes sense to me at this point. Nothing. I miss Shannon too, a lot more than I thought I could miss anybody. I wish there was some way I could talk to her, if I had her address or phone number, something. I just need to hear from her... I need to go. Fall like parachutes

[04 Jan 2004|02:40pm] So. Because I'm unable to send this I decided to post it. Gabby, So. I heard about what happened. Let me start by saying that you amongst many other people are wrong. You think that some 15 year old girl did this to you. The real person who did this was a man named Tim, you & many people know him as Mike. You knew him as Mike because he never gave you his real name. He had to protect himself, from his father, and people from his past even though most of the time, they found him. It killed him not telling you his real name. It really did. But he did it for himself. Now, what he did, to this girl Melissa. He set her up, he FRAMED her for this to get back at her for personal reasons. I didn't know he had this planned until he explained & admitted everything five days ago. It doesn't matter now, because he's gone. Dead. Tim had A LOT of problems. He told me, and other friends he had to hide himself to protect himself. I still don't know if thats true. I don't know about anything at all anymore. But I do know that his planned worked he got an innocent girl in a lot of trouble for something she had no idea was going on. I barely know her, we go to school together but we rarely talk. We've talked the last week and a half more than I've talked to anyone. My heart goes out to this girl, she has nothing now. She can't talk with her friends,go out, see her boyfriend, nothing. For atleast a month. She told me she is going crazy. I don't blame her when you practically have the entire world against you for all the wrong reasons. It's not her fault he hacked into her mothers phone system, and computer. It's not her fault he used her. It's his. You can't blame her for his mistakes. That's all I really have to say about that. She did want you to know she feels terrible and she's sorry for the whole situation. Don't take this out on the wrong person Gabby. Maybe you could take time out and read her journal, her username is __em0kid Well. If it means anything. I wish you well. Rob I'm not sure if she will read that. I'm not positive anyone will. 3 Fall like parachutes

[26 Dec 2003|01:22pm] [ mood | cheerful ] [ music | Wearing Thin - Futherseemsforever ] Hey everybody! It's been awhile again, lol. I'm at my dads house right now. My Christmas was good, I guess. I got too see my entire family, & my niece. It was really nice. My brothers & sister came late but it was good seeing them again. Everyone was at my fathers house for dinner, and we all exchanged gifts & what not. My grandmother bought us these blankets, everyone got one. I guess they were like 50 dollars each. But they are really beautifuln and they are huge! I didn't really get much this year, which was good because I didn't want a lot. I got this new CD/Mp3 thing. It's really awesome. It's got great sound. I also got some cloths & giftcards, and shoes. Ohhh, and I got some CD's, a hat and a shirt from some friends last weekend. I'm feeling a lot better, but my back is still in pretty bad shape. I can't play my drums for a long time. :( I hate it. But I'm not worried about it now. I'm just hoping I have another good day today. I'm going out with some friends of mine later, & I'm watching my niece for a little while tonight. I'm happy, She's adorable. Her name is Elizabeth Jade, Shes a year and seven months. She's a cutie, lol. I bought my sister a dog for christmas, and I got my brother Tony stuff for hockey, Because he plays hockey for college. And my other brother, Josh. He has a baby on the way so I got him some baby cloths, and this little hat that says "I love my daddy", and a giftcard for himself. And I got his girlfriend stuff too. Overall my christmas was good. But it was hard, in some ways. Grr. Anyways, I'm going to jump in the shower. Happy Holidays everyone. 1 Fall like parachutes

[16 Nov 2003|09:29am] [ mood | artistic ] in the circuit, the frequency's breaking up. the speakers can barely move this is not a test tune to the broadcast. witness the jetlag. look in the mirror. adjust the V-hold shatter the lens. pull out the shards. choke on her words, caught in her throat. how long can the wheels maintain a spin, at this velocity? on every block, a reminder: you can't stop this intersection. at every turn, dead forests of tenements rise like antennas. the miles are adding up and the days are counting down. cut the jet black from my hair before we're bathed in the dawn of New Year's Day. I will change back to myself in the flame, we burn like the paper hearts of dead presidents. we're too lost, to lose hope. maybe the night seems so dark because the day is much too bright for us to see that we are cured. shatter the lens. pull out the shards. we are cured choke on her words, caught in your throat. that's the sound of music from another room the piano player hangs from piano wire but the player piano carries on. sit back and tune to the broadcast. this is not a test shatter the lens. pull out the shards. choke on her words, caught in your throat. as the language dissolves and the setence lifts, a slow alphabet of rain is whispering, "aabcttipacbdefg..." since I replaced the I in live with an O, I can't remember who you are... ...but tomorrow I'll be you. just pick up the phone. I'm calling from your house, in your room, in your name, lying in your bed, following your dreams. I listen to your voice get caught in my throat as I sing, "This Is Just A Dream." on New Year's Day, we will change back to ourselves. in the flame we are cured. we are cured. we are cured. 1 Fall like parachutes

[15 Nov 2003|02:15am] [ mood | content ] So, it's been about 100 years since I've written in here. I actually forgot. But Mike reminded me tonight. But I don't feel like writing anymore. So I'll leave you all with this : I’m heaven sent don’t you dare forget I am all you ever wanted what all the other boys all promised sorry I told I just needed you to know I think in decimals and dollars I am the cause to all your problems shelter from cold we're never alone coordinate brain and mouth then ask me what its like to have my self so figured out wish I knew I hope this song starts a craze the kinda song that ignites the airways the kinda song that makes people glad to be where they are with whom ever they're there with this is war every line is about who I don’t wanna write about anymore hope you come down with something they cant diagnose they'll have the cure for holding on to your grudge oh its so hard to have someone to love keeping quiet is hard cause you cant keep a secret if it was never was a secret to start at least pretend you didn’t wanna get caught We're concentrating on fallen apart we were contenders of thrown in a fight I just wanna believe, I just wanna believe I just wanna believe... in us oh we're so controversial we are entirely smooth we've been to the truth we are the best at what we do the means to the words you wish you wrote down this is the way you wish your voice sounds handsomely smart oh the tongue the only muscle in my body that works harder than my heart and is all from watching tv and its speeding up my breathing wouldn't stop if i could oh it hurts to be this good holding on to your grudge oh it hurts to always have to be honest with the one that you love oh so let it go We're concentrating on fallen apart we were contenders, a bull in a fight I just wanna believe I just wanna believe I just wanna believe in us We're concentrating on fallen apart we were contenders, a bull in a fight just wanna believe i just wanna believe I just wanna believe in us This is the craze only we can withstand this is the price you pay for lost of control this is the breaking of man this is closest we've called this is the reason your in love this is the world we live in . 4 Fall like parachutes

[18 Sep 2003|06:45pm] [ mood | hungry ] [ music | Greenday_ Time of your life ] hmm..Hey everybody, it's been a long time since I've written in this thing. I've been pretty busy, with school, and work & taking care of my mom & stuff. Plus I'm sick and the only time I really find time to get online, is like at 11:00. I'm staying at my grandma's house now I think I mentioned that before..but oh well. I'm worried about Mike he left to go see Gabby becuz she is in the hospital I guess, and he hasn't called or anything yet to let me know he is okay, So hopefully they both are alright and well. Hmm, plus I tried to email him, and it wouldn't let me. kinda freaks me out. I hate beng sick it sucks a lot. I went out today, & just got back a little while ago, I went out with Chris, Dave, and Nathan. it was cool, Dave's band is having a show on october 10th and we handed out flyers at the schools, and the mall. The hurricane is pretty bad, Tonight & tomorrow it's supposed to be real shitty weather so that sucks. Well, anyways I'm going to go talk to Shannon now =] so I'll update later. Fall like parachutes

just an update [31 Aug 2003|11:42pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | Count The Stars_ The First Time ] I haven't updated in awhile I've been busy & everything w/ shit. my father & I got in another fight and I'm staying at my grandmothers house and she told me I could move in!!! I'm thinking about it too and I think I'm going to I talked to shannon today! =] for like six hours lol. I'm going to guitar center tomorrow & I'm going to look around at some new drumsets, even though I have two. lol. God, I did nothing today I feel lazy but I don't care I'm tired and my fingers hurt from typing!!! Oh, yeah. I'm pissed about the Dashboard Confessional tour, The closest they get is NYC. & that sucks becuz I like that band a lot, plus they are touring w/ Brand New!!!!! maybe my stepdad can get tickets, well I hope becuz that would be really awesome. I found this new band, Sparta. They rock. so I think everybody needs to check them out. anyways I'm hungry so I'm going to go eat. later everyone. 2 Fall like parachutes

=\ [25 Aug 2003|11:54pm] [ mood | annoyed ] [ music | Bruises ] Waiting in my room I'm lying on the bed Cuz outside is just too cold I turned the radio loud So I can fall asleep But it's all I've come to know Push me and you Shoved like you always do But nothing's ever the same But how can I explain The damage you have done When all that's left is pain So I tried to stay awake And so I would try and stay awake And so I learn.... I Fucking tried your way And I don't like what I see Cuz I've been put to the test And faced all the rest And useless is all I'll be So I tried your way And don't like what I see And now I'm bored... Waiting in my room I'm lying on the floor Cuz outside i just don't know I turned the radio loud So i can hear me think But it's all I've come to know So I tried to stay awake And so I would try to stay awake And so I learn... I fucking tried your way And I don't like what I see I've been put to the test And faced all the rest And useless is all I'll be So I tried your way And I don't like what I see And now I'm bored... So I burn a part of me that slowly fades to you, but how can I plainly see what slowly fades to me 1 Fall like parachutes

[23 Aug 2003|09:47pm] [ mood | drained ] [ music | Theres no I in team_Taking back sunday ] Hmm..I got bored & figured I would update even though I have nothing really exciting or happy to talk about..well I take that back. Today was pretty boring..I went and saw steph since I haven't seen here for awhile, She was really happy, She was showing me pictures of her & her boyfriend Dave. So, I'm happy for them both even though I don't really know dave that well. last night sucked too I got into it w/ my father but we won't talk about that, so that sucked. I've been thinking a lot about mike lately, it sucks not having him here just to talk to, and hang around with. We've been talking to eachother on the phone though, this place that he is staying at, it's insane I swear, he has like..nothing. They don't let him to anything, seriously. He's been there for a few days, but god, they treat him so bad, I seriously think he'd just be better off NOT there, So hopefully he'll take that into consideration. Anyway, I got some new drum sticks today, So I was playing my drums for about an hour, it gets my mind off things, and it works. Thats probably why I love my drums & everything. Tomorrow my sister & I are going out cloths shopping, oh yay..bunches of fun. not really lol. uh oh here comes my dad gotta go Fall like parachutes

Just a song. [20 Aug 2003|07:09pm] [ mood | okay ] [ music | The quiet things no one ever knows_brand new ] well hey guys, I was listening to a CD Mike burnt for me, and one of our songs is on it, lol So I got the lyrics and decided to post them. Passed out on the overpass Sunday best and broken glass Broken down from the bikes and bars Suspended like spirits over speeding cars You and me were kings over the parkway tonight And tonight will go on forever while we walk around this town like we own the streets and stay awake through summer like we own the heat Singing "everybody wake up(wake up)it's time to get down" (everybody, everybody wake up its time to get down) And when I pass the bottle back to Pete on the overpass tonight, I bet we laugh I'm gonna stay eighteen forever (cut me open) So we can stay like this forever (sun poisoned) And we'll never miss a party (this offer stands forever) cause we keep them going constantly And we'll never have to listen (new haircut) to anyone about anything (new bracelet) cause it's all been done and it's all been said (eyeliner) we're the coolest kids and we take what we can get (wait forever) The hell out of this town Find some conversation The low fule lights been on for days It doesn't mean anyhting I've got another 500 nother 500 miles before we shut this engine down, we shut it down I'm gonna stay eighteen forever (cut me open) So we can stay like this forever (sun poisoned) And we'll never miss a party (this offer stands forever) cause we keep them going constantly And we'll never have to listen (new haircut) to anyone about anything (new bracelet) cause it's all been done and it's all been said (eyeliner) we're the coolest kids and we take what we can get (wait forever) (you're just jealous cause I'm young and in love) Eighteen forever (your stomachs filled up but you're starved for conversation) So we can stay like this forever (you're spending all your nights growing old in your bed) And we'll never miss a party (and your tearin up your photos cause you wanna forget... it's over) cause we keep them going constantly (you're just jealous cause I'm young and in love) And we'll never have to listen (your stomachs filled up but you're starved for conversation) to anyone about anything cause it's all been done (you're spending all your nights growing old in your bed) and it's all been said (and your tearin up your photos cause you wanna forget... it's over) we're the coolest kids and we take what we can get Just jealous cause we're young and in love You're just jealous cause we're young and in love You're just jealous cause we're young and in love You're just jealous cause we're young and in love You're just jealous cause we're young and in love You're just jealous cause we're young and in love Fall like parachutes

[14 Aug 2003|02:35am] [ mood | depressed ] [ music | Staind_outside ] this is so messed.. I swear I know me & my mom have problems...I know we don't get along & stuff but she doesn't deserve to have cancer. I call home to check up on my brother & i hear my mom is dying of lung cancer, how fucked is that? i know my family & I have issues w/eachother and they pretty much disown me but i dont want any one of them to die further more feel pain even though they feed me pain. I feel like shit I jus want my mother to be ok even if she does hate me. anyways here's something since I really don't know whut to say Haphazardly, Tumbling Hard Fall Right Down, Laugh Out Loud All In The Scheme Of Things, We're All Looking Up Growing Tall It's Like Pulling One Hair You Are What You Are To Me With Wet Fingers In My Eyes You're A Star Petroleum Jelly You're Something I'll Never Be And Watch The Rain Dance You're Something, I'm Frightened Of I've Got To Get Clean The Rain Will Cleanse Me And I've Got To Wash These Filthy Hands Because It's All Just A Futile Plan That'd Mean I'd Have To Believe Again It's Like A Career To Breathe An Existence I Can't Conceive Emotionless As In Slug In My Imagined Oblivion It's As Much Fun As Poking At A Nerve You Would Swear, That I Could, Walk And Talk No One Wants To Fail But No One Wants To Work But I Doubt You Will Ever Vocabulary Test Is Graded On A Curve Ever Prove Enough Smartest Kid Is Stupid Word Is Never Heard I Doubt You'll Ever Prove It! I've Got To Get Clean The Rain Will Cleanse Me And I've Got to Wash These Filthy Hands All These Thoughts And Feelings Are For Naught Unappealing So You Expect Them To Dull And Fade Still They Remain Caught Waiting For The Rain Time Devours Life With My Soul As The Defendant Don't Catch Me If I Fall I May Have Jumped You Never Know You Don't Know Me At All 2 Fall like parachutes

[08 Aug 2003|12:50pm] [ mood | worried ] [ music | damnit_ blink182 ] hey everybody, Haven't updated in a few days. things have juss been too crazy around here for anything. I guess mike & I are going back today. I guess thats cool becuz mike juss has to get out of here. I'm really worried about him & everything, most definitely after last night. two days in a row he's cried himself to sleep. i feel so fucking bad for him. He always ends up hurt in the end. it doesn't matter but he always gets hurt. and truthfully, I'm sick of it. Mike's like my brother I love the guy & hate seeing him in pain, or hurting. but he does & it sucks he's only nineteen he doesn't need this stuff. on the 24th, he's leaving though. He's going to get help which I guess is an awesome thing becuz he doesn't want to cut anymore he hasn't wanted to for awhile now. But like he's told me it's too hard to stop. Anyways, on a brighter note. our band has a show in about a week and a half, we're opening up for some band lol. afterwards, we're throwing a huge party. It's going to be awesome i can't wait. well i guess im juss going to go now so peace everybody 4 Fall like parachutes

update... [02 Aug 2003|04:30pm] [ mood | worried ] [ music | Linkin park_hit the floor ] uhhm, juss a quick update. things have been kind of crazy here the last couple days, mike's been sick real bad, passing out & throwing up. He left yesterday, and hasn't been back since but he called crying & freaking out about everything, I guess he's been cutting really bad I can't find him anywhere his aunt & I have been panicing I really do not understand becuz cutting urself doesn't make anything better becuz afterwards the pain and everything just comes back. He's got me worried, his friends worried and his girlfriend as well. he really has to stop this shit becuz it's really starting to make me think he's going to kill himself everytime his pain becomes unbearable..it's frustrating but I know i juss got to live w/ it so yup , moving on now..Stephanie is back :) I've known steph since I have been in second grade, we're good friends pretty much like brother & sister. She's going out w/ my friend dave as well, so I really hope everything works out between them. some of mike's friends left me comments! lol so thank u all for the comments. I met one of mike's good friends, her name is shannon and she is really pretty :) and nice, can't wait to see where things go. well I'm off toworry about mike sum more and sit here, so take care everybody. Rob_ 7 Fall like parachutes

Umm my first entry? [31 Jul 2003|11:51pm] [ mood | mellow ] [ music | Mudvayne_Not falling ] Well um, I guess this is my first entry lol. Mike made me a blurty becuz we both were bored and wanted something 2 do. Well uhm, Mike is taking a shower rite now he was pretty upset about some stuff and went to just relax a little, I'd want to too if i was him he's been thru a lot the last couple days. well anyways i'm mike's close friend rob we've been friends for quite some time now and it's nice becuz mike is a cool guy and all that good stuff. 2day we hung out at some mall, looked around. We also were talking about our band( shades of blood) and whuts going 2 be happening w/ that. We actually came up w/ some lyrics 4 a song we're going to try to do. I'll post them. We we wrote them on a napkin in the mall lol becuz we were just walking and thinking of words and we decided to sit down + write them since they sounded pretty decent. This is what we've got so far: I want to tell you how I feel But I dont have the courage to say these things to you. I want you to know what kind of, pain you've caused. I want you to see the perfect world, I lost. I want to watch you cry until your eyes, become numb. Chorus: FOR ALL THE SHIT YOU'VE PUT ME THRU I WISH I COULD TELL YOU I HATE YOU FOR ALL THE TIMES YOU'VE MADE ME CRY I WISH I COULD TELL YOU I WANT YOU TO DIE I want to run to you for answers But I know you wont be there I want a shoulder to lean on But yours' isnt there, I want to tell you everything But I know you won't care yup, its pretty rough rite now lol thats what we've got rite now we didn't edit or anything and it's not done as u can see lol we want another verse, and a refrain in there, or an altered chorus, Just mike singing by himself. We like the chorus but the rest is kind of iffy, lol.Tell me what u people think. well me + mike are going 2 go talk since he's out of the shower. peace. 5 Fall like parachutes

..yea [31 Jul 2003|11:43pm] [ mood | confused ] [ music | People hate me- Muderdolls ] Hey rob, here you go -shrugs- love you bro <3 ( m i k e ` Fall like parachutes

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