Androgynous One's Blurty Entries [entries|friends|calendar]
Androgynous One

[ website | Exiled Darkness ]
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[26 May 2003|04:15pm]
I'm sure you've all noticed I don't really update this a lot.

In fact . . . you're better off to either watch my lj ( or the personal blog that I recently put up (

Just so you know.
. . . subete no ikari o shizume

[29 Apr 2003|12:05am]
I feel like writing random poetry on the spot . . . so I shall . . .

Summer Rain

The summer rain,
Like the phantom
Fades away,
Like the banshee
Screams to say,
That it's here
And is gone.

Soft and cool,
Yet deceptive,
It stays.
Upon flowers
As dew
It lays.

In the heart,
One may find
Summer rain.
If the walls
Are not too high--
Not in vain.

Cry a river
Full of blood
And gore.
Cry an ocean,
Rip a heart
Once more.

And in shadow
You're alone.
As the cold
To the bone.

In a silent
Bleed again.
Till the terror,
In a circle
Summer rain.

I scare myself with what I write randomly.
2 Shizukanaru osei-tachi yo . . . subete no ikari o shizume

[27 Apr 2003|03:59pm]

You're a playful lesbian! Life is all fun and
games, right?

What Kind of Lesbian Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

*blinks* Okay?

I need a life. I need to finish this picture. I need more manga.

Or Mauri would suffice. :p
1 Shizukanaru osei-tachi yo . . . subete no ikari o shizume

[21 Apr 2003|05:13pm]
Gah, boredom is not good for me . . . .

100 questions for an artist )
2 Shizukanaru osei-tachi yo . . . subete no ikari o shizume

[16 Apr 2003|09:32pm]
Bleh . . . I give. Too many people do these type of things . . . I'm making mine up on the spot, though :p

I ______ Casey.
Casey is the _____ _____ I've ever know.
I want to _____ Casey.
I secretly _____ Casey.
Casey is ______.
Casey reminds me of ______.
Casey's ______ is ______.
When I think of Casey I ________.

I'm gonna stop before I put more questions I might regret the answers to . . . .
1 Shizukanaru osei-tachi yo . . . subete no ikari o shizume

The name "Casey" actually fits me TT;;;; [15 Apr 2003|10:49pm]
What my name says about my love life . . . or something like that:

Of course, you do everything to get loved. When you're really in love, you're capable of the greatest generosity, the greatest sincerity and the greatest efforts, for you need to feel that your mate considers you as a unique, exceptional, and irreplaceable being. But it must be pointed out that you have difficulty adapting yourself to others in general and to the other one in particular. It is therefore necessary that your mate shows enough flexibility so as to put up with your strong personality. Furthermore, every actor needs a public; and which public is more readily available than the one who shares your existence?

Yes, I really do everything to get loved . . . so sue me. Yes, it's almost impossible for me to adapt . . . damn this thing is accurate TT;;;;;

In love, you are majestic with your generosity and the intensity of your flame, but you demand full and complete admiration. In return, you enjoy protecting and showering your goodness. Passions play an essential role in your love destiny; these may be solid and durable, even though you always tends to question them. Possessive in your affections, you prefer to reject what you can't control. Your love life would be more harmonious if you could understand others better. Often, ambition or interest gets involved in your affairs of the heart; but it would be wrong to believe that you lack romanticism.

Is it wrong to want to be admired? Yes, I do reject what I can't control. This thing is scaring me. What scares me more is apparently my parents knew what they were doing when they named me.

Endowed with powerful magnetism, you arouse passion better than anyone else. And, among all the suitors crowded at your feet, it is by no means very difficult for you to choose your sister soul. Thus, when one with your first name is single, it's generally because she wanted and decided that. If you wish to experience couple life, you will tend to place the bar so high that you'll nevertheless have difficulty finding the rare pearl.

Magnetism . . . is that what it is? O_o; Yeah . . . I probably do have fairly high standards :/

That thing scares me . . . *goes to check what it says for Mauri*

Oh, if you're interested the URL is here:

I think . . . that this site gives lesbian hints in it's results *snicker* Particulary after reading Mauri's.
2 Shizukanaru osei-tachi yo . . . subete no ikari o shizume

[29 Mar 2003|10:57am]
Okay, I'm just plain too bored.

Stole this from a person on my LJ . . .  )
3 Shizukanaru osei-tachi yo . . . subete no ikari o shizume

[29 Mar 2003|10:21am]
Another personality test type thing )
. . . subete no ikari o shizume

[27 Mar 2003|03:35pm]
CANCER: Either you are one, or you should be.

What Western Zodiac Star Sign Should You Be? (with images!)
brought to you by Quizilla

O_o; I don't think it suits me . . . but odd.

I'm a Cancer/Leo, by the way (cusps are odd things XD;)
. . . subete no ikari o shizume

[23 Mar 2003|06:18pm]
Paranoid:Very High
Schizotypal:Very High
Borderline:Very High
Avoidant:Very High

-- Click Here To Take The Test --

Well . . . that can't be good :/

Whooo XD; I have no lows at all XD
. . . subete no ikari o shizume

[15 Mar 2003|02:23pm]

I. Hate. School.

Hmm . . . on the other hand, excepting a few things, people, and situations I also hate life *blinks*

At least it's not yesterday. Yesterday was terrible. But it's not yesterday, it's today. It's today and I really need to do that research paper instead of procrastinating . . . damn schoolwork.

Info Grey
Your Heart is Grey

What Color is Your Heart?
brought to you by Quizilla

. . . Yes, the corner is a nice place. Until someone annoying from reality comes and drags you out of it. Or school. I'm blaming school for everything lately TT;;;;
1 Shizukanaru osei-tachi yo . . . subete no ikari o shizume

[08 Mar 2003|10:16pm]
I finished that picture for you, Mauri . . . but you just logged off and my mom will want me off ASAP . . . so I'm posting it here. ^^ I hope you feel much better tomorrow ;_;

2 Shizukanaru osei-tachi yo . . . subete no ikari o shizume

[01 Mar 2003|08:32pm]
I downloaded a live video of Malice Mizer's Illuminati today . . . Mauri . . . I've sooo got to send this to you XD

*snickers* You'd appreciate it as much as I do.
. . . subete no ikari o shizume

[01 Mar 2003|04:26pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]

. . . I'm so tired. I just got tired a few hours ago. I don't know why. Hmm . . . maybe I'm getting sick. I only get to the point where I actually have to fight sleep (like now) when I'm nearing collapsing from exhaustion. Collapsing/passing out from exhaustion is the only way I ever get to sleep. No wonder I never sleep good --;

One bad thing. I can't afford to sleep now. I have school stuff that needs to get done. But I can't think enough to do it. Guess I'll be praying I'm more awake tomorrow and that I can get a lot of stuff done. Either that or for more snow days. I think we'll have no more, though.

This really sucks. I hope I'm not coming down with something, I really hope so.

. . . subete no ikari o shizume

[24 Feb 2003|05:53pm]
[ mood | blah ]

Hmmm . . . school was cancelled today . . . so I've been home . . . mostly bored out of my mind TT;

I managed to draw a sketch of Genjo Sanzo of Gensomaden Saiyuki which I plan to use as a site layout type thing :/

Watch, I'll get lazy now and it'll never happen.

I managed to finish some more character profiles for a story I plan to write, so hopefully I'll finish them soon . . . three more to go . . . blech.

I really feel like my life is going nowhere. Then again, I think I've always felt this way. I want to go somewhere, damnit ><; It would probably help if I could figure out where first, though.

Everyone says I have talent. They say I'm intelligent. Everything has always been this way for me, it's all natural. I've never really had to work hard for anything. People would say that's a gift. But you know what, I look at the people who do work hard and admire their resolve. It makes me feel like nothing, like trash. This is the way I've felt for quite awhile . . . which is part of the reason for my negative outlook. I dislike the fact that things come too easily. Don't get me wrong, there are some things that don't come naturally, but I give up on those, or blow them off. And that infuriates me. But it's worse if I don't, because I stress myself out and can't think clearly.

. . . I'm going to ask a cliché question here: why does life have to be so hard?

. . . I need to do some make-up Algebra homework :/ I don't think it'll get done today, though *sigh*

. . . when did this turn into some sort of reflection thingy . . . I'm losing it ><; That and the fact that my private blog went to hell . . . okay, so the host server banned the blog applet I use (Greymatter) . . . same difference.

Hmm . . . I've been depending on others too much lately, I need to start to stand up by myself and carry my own burdens again. *rolls eyes* I can do it, I know that, I did it for years and years XD;;; Just gotta get back into the swing of things. It's gonna be hell until then, though TT;;;;

. . . subete no ikari o shizume

[18 Feb 2003|09:17pm]
Today's been a pretty good day . . . albeit unproductive.

School was cancelled today, and is cancelled tomorrow. And I still haven't done my Language Arts assignment TT;;;;

I also found a new manga which has GORGEOUS artwork, I'm in love with it @__@ It's called Alichino.
. . . subete no ikari o shizume

Can I restart the day? [17 Feb 2003|02:04pm]
[ mood | gloomy ]
[ music | I am the Rain - Assemblege 23 ]

Bleck. Today started out fine, really . . . but then I lost all inspiration to do things. The problem is I at least need to finish a school assignment, but I can't seem to focus on it. That particular teacher won't let me turn it in late.

I also spilled milk all over myself and the blanket I drape over myself at the computer. That and I woke up originally at 3:40 something in the morning. Only to find out the elecricity was iffy and hear the computer I had running reset. So I turned off the computer in case we got another power surge --;

Then it's sleeting outside. Rainy weather is okay, but heavy snow or sleet somewhat makes me depressed.

It all adds to not that great of a day and me in a not so great mood --;

I want to start this day over TT;;; I have so many things I need to do. All I feel like doing is going to bed.

I hate days like this.

. . . subete no ikari o shizume

. . . long . . . someone . . . shoot me. [16 Feb 2003|02:16pm]
Name: Casey
Sex: Female . . . at least as of now . . . .
Age: 16
Birthday: July 23, 1986 (bolded for Mauri's benefit, j/k!)
Siblings: 1; younger sister
Pets: None . . . though I wonder about my sister at times
Height: 5'5-6" ish
Hair Color: Brown with a somewhat auburn tint (natural too! XD;)
Eye Color: Blue-grey
Eye Color of Choice: Green
Writing Hand: Right
Current Residence: Ohio, USA. Small town in the southern part, my parents will kill me if I say where.

Nervous Habits: Looking down, very figity (I'm like that all the time anyway), I probably play/chew (chew . . . on anything really) on my hair --; *thinks* That's all I can think of at the moment TT;;
Can you roll your tongue?: Nope ><;
Can you raise one eyebrow at a time?: I think I can . . .
Can you blow spit bubbles?: Maybe if I tried . . . my sister can . . . and does
Can you cross your eyes?: Yes, they start to hurt if I leave them too long, though . . . and it's hard to walk
Tattoos?: None
Piercings and where?: 2; one in each ear
Do you make your bed daily?: No, I'm a slob

Which shoe goes on first?: Whichever I pick up first lol
Speaking of shoes, have you ever thrown one at anyone?: Oh, yeah
On the average, how much money do you carry in your purse/wallet?: I don't carry a purse and my mom is against me carrying a wallet --;
What jewelry do you wear 24/7?: Nothing really . . . not even earrings
Favorite Piece of Clothing: All my black stuff ^___^
Pajamas: These red flannel-y ones I have XD; Really soft and comfortable ^^

Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it?: Twirl, takes too much time to cut it
Have you ever eaten Spam?: No, and I'm glad of that
Favorite Ice Cream Flavor: Lime sherbert
How many cereals in your cabinet?: I dunno, I don't make a habit of counting that
What's your favorite beverage?: Fruit juices
What's your favorite restaurant?: Don't really have one . . . maybe Pizza Hut could work, though
Do you cook?: Somewhat. If it has a recipe I can probably do it

How often do you brush your teeth?: Whenever I get the impulse . . . usually at least once a day . . . .
How often do you shower/bathe?: Every other day, unless something comes up
How long does your shower last?: I don't take showers . . . baths are 15-20 minutes, less if I'm in a hurry
Hair drying method: I attempt to somewhat dry it, but it still drip dries
Have you ever colored/highlighted your hair?: I tried to dye it black once . . . but that didn't work
Do you paint your nails?: Not really

Do you swear?: A lot. My mom hates that
Do you ever spit?: Not really.

Animal: Snakes?
Food: None
Month: October . . . and I don't know why
Day: Holidays from school
Cartoon: Yami no Matsuei, Gravitation, Majutsushi Orphen
Shoe Brand: Doesn't matter
Subject in school: Language Arts, Choir
Color: Black
Sport: Soccer
Tv show: None?
Best Looking Male Celebs: Not interested
Holiday: Good question. One that requires me staying at home on my butt and being lazy
Thing to do in Spring: Be on the computer
Thing To Do In The Summer: Celebrate my birthday?
Thing To Do In The Fall: Be on computer
Thing To Do In The Winter: Be on computer and wish it wasn't so cold

The CD Player: Lately I've been listening to this CD I burned J-rock bands to (L'Arc~en~Ciel, Malice Mizer, Dir en Grey . . . )
Person you talk most on the phone with: Mauri . . . I don't talk to anyone else on the phone
Ever taken a cab?: No
Do you regularly check yourself out in store windows and mirrors?: No, I'm too busy wishing I was somewhere else . . . I don't like crowded stores . . . or anywhere where escape would be impossible or difficult (that's . . . somewhat agoraphobia . . . )
What color is your bedroom?: An odd . . . tealish-green
Do you use an alarm clock?: Sometimes. Most of the time no
Window seat or aisle?: Window ^___^

What's your sleeping position?: Usually on my side, mostly wherever I feel comfortable that night
Even in hot weather do you use a blanket?: Yes, and a very heavy one at that
Do you snore?: At times
Do you sleepwalk?: I don't think I have
Do you talk in your sleep?: I probably have
Do you sleep with a stuffed animals?: I have . . . lately no
How about with the light on?: Yeah, it's become a habit . . . that and by the time I'm finished doing this or that I'm too lazy to get up and turn it off TT; I can sleep with lights out, though --;
Do you fall asleep with the TV or radio on?: I probably would . . . but no TV in my room . . . no good radio stations

Coke or Pepsi?: Neither . . . soda=EVIL
Oranges or apples?: Oranges. Jeimi ( . . . no one will get that).
One pillow or two?: Three!
Deaf or blind?: Deaf . . . probably, though I'd hate being both
Pools or hot tubs?: No thanks
Blondes or brunettes?: Red-heads ^^;;
Tall or short?: Tall? . . . Average?
TV or radio?: INTERNET!
Beach or pool?: . . . beach . . . maybe
Tic-Tacs or Certs?: Neither
Snooze button or jump out of bed?: Sadly, jump out of bed . . . because no matter what my alarm clock is on the other side of the room XD;
Sunrise or Sunset?: Sunsets
Hamburger or Cheeseburger?: Vanilla shake? Fine, hamburgers.
Morning or night?: Night ^^
Sports or news?: Cartoons!
Indoors or outdoors?: Both
Cake or ice cream?: Ice cream, I hate cake
Spearmint or Peppermint?: Spearmint
Bath or shower?: Bath
Book or Movie?: Book
Green or Red apples?: Red
Rain or Snow?: Rain
Nike or Adidas?: Neither, I'm not much for brandnames, I look at other attributes

Took a shower?: Can't remember . . . can't remember most of the stuff I did yesterday, though . . . so that says NOTHING. I'll be taking a bath today, though.
Cried?: I dunno . . . maybe the second day of school (classmate killed in car accident)?
Talked on the phone?: The day before yesterday, I think
Read a book?: . . . I need to get a new book
Punched someone?: *blinks* Probably Elementary School

Where do you see yourself in ten years?: I hope to be a successful comic artist/graphic novelist
Who are you going to be married to?: Hopefully, my Mauri-koi ^^
How many kids?: I don't like kids TT;;; Well, infants and toddlers, anyway.
Your profession: I stated that *facefaults*
. . . subete no ikari o shizume

[16 Feb 2003|08:28am]
[ music | Angel's Tale - L'Arc~en~Ciel (Hyde) ]

Even if it takes me all day . . . I'm going to do this quiz. I'll prove that I can do one of these lyrics quizes XD; (even though I've never been able to complete one before ><;;)

Hmm . . . not supposed to use the same song more than once . . . that makes it considerably harder.

1. Are you male or female?

Boys in the girl's room
Girls in the men's room
You free your mind in your androgyny

Androgyny - Garbage

That was unspecific on purpose ;p

2. Describe yourself:

I'm only happy when it rains
I feel good when things are going wrong
I only listen to the sad, sad songs
I'm only happy when it rains

I only smile in the dark
My only comfort is the night gone black
I didn't accidentally tell you that
I'm only happy when it rains

Only Happy When it Rains - Garbage

3. How do they feel about you?

They? 0_o; Hmm . . . maybe this?

It must be nice
To be so sure
And never feel insecure
It must feel good to believe
You're always right
And you're never wrong

You think you're untouchable
You know
No one’s untouchable

Untouchable - Garbage

4. How do you feel about yourself?

Lose my head to the chemical freeway
Comin' up on overload
In a mystic new dimension
Purify and sanctify me
What so I'm in no end game
Move my piece right off the board
Losing sure is easy
So I am no more

But I'm not broken, in my dream I win
In here I'm nothing, a Cosmic Castaway

Cosmic Castaway - Electrasy (Titan AE)

5. How do you feel about life?

Days will come that make no sense
My present situation makes me think too much, too much
It all revolves around you
This life that I'm living means nothing without you

Skin - Adema

6. What's going through your mind right now?

And I want a moment to be real,
Wanna touch things I don't feel,
Wanna hold on and feel I belong.
And how can the world want me to change,
They’re the ones that stay the same.
The don’t know me,
'Cause I’m not here.

I'm Still Here - John Rzeznik (Treasure Planet)

Close enough anyway . . . .

7. What would you rather be doing?

Show me love, show me love, show me love,
Show me love, show me love
'Til you open the door

Show me love, show me love, show me
Show me love, show me love,
'Til I'm up off the floor

Show me love, show me love show me love,
Show me love, show me love,
'Til it's inside my pores

Show me love, show me love, show me love,
Show me love, show me love,
'Til I'm screaming for more

Show Me Love - t.A.T.u.

8. Describe how you feel about the person you love:

kono me mitsumete watashi no namae wo yonde mite hoshii no
kono te nigitte daijoubu datte unazuite hoshii no
kono se wo oshite janakya arukitsudzukeraresou ni nai no
uso nara semete hontou no uso saigo made tsukitooshite

Look into my eyes, I want you to call my name.
I want you to hold my hand and say it's ok by nodding your head
Help me, or I think I'll never be able to go on.
If it's a lie, at least lie until the end

I Am - Ayumi Hamasaki

Minus the last night . . . but I don't feel like trying to pick through the Japanese to edit it out --; And I probably could find a better song . . . or maybe I couldn't . . .

9. Describe how you love:

I wake up from a nightmare now
In the day it haunts me
It slowly tears me apart
With dreams of a distant love
I'm a wandering satellite

Somewhere in the wasteland
I see you smiling at me
A vision out of my dreams
Will everything change ?
Take the pain away
Lead me with your light

Heading for the sun
Leave the sadness behind
Crossing oceans dry

Spirit Dreams Inside - L'Arc~en~Ciel

. . . that's the closest I can find *sweatdrops*

10. Share a few words of wisdom:


And everything that my mom said made me mad
And everything that my dad said made me sad

Freaking Out - Adema

Just thought I'd put something random --;


The fact that I took the time to do that is just sad, very sad TT;

I also downloaded scanlations of Kaori Yuki's Count Caine this morning . . . I'm addicted to her works TT;;;;;

. . . subete no ikari o shizume

[13 Feb 2003|02:02pm]
[ mood | sick ]
[ music | Not Gonna Get Us - t.A.T.u. ]

your fuck.

What swear word are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Er . . . O.o; How . . . nice?

I really should stop spamming this thing with quizes. Oh, well --;

Acid reflux is back :/ That's soooo not good.

. . . subete no ikari o shizume

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