I'm shaking, shuddering... can hardly breathe.... Ill be okay..
I didnt cut. havent in a bit.. perhaps a week? maybe? I wonder...
told myself if I made it through today I could cut, if I still felt like shit... dont think I will. I want to make a month.. and fuck it seems like cutting is cool so now I DONT want to do it even more b/c if people find out now they will think it is just for attention, screw the other 4 yrs its been going on.
Last year for swim pics I had 4 noticably scars on my arms... and more on my legs but we were wearing pants so it didnt matter. If you look at the pic you can see, i think, two of the cut on my arms. This year there were no visible cuts, none. I'm kinda proud of myself... yay..
Wish I didnt feel this... blah
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