|Current music:||brand new- mix tape|
i don't know why i'm making one of these, somebody will wind up finding it and there will be tons of drama as always. oh well though, i guess it's a "risk" that i'm gonna have to take. i need somebody or something to vent to, and i definitely can't with my friends.
these last two weeks have been complete hell for me and i'm not too sure why. i think it's because i'm so unhappy with myself that i'm taking it out on everybody around me. i hate the way i look, my grades are slipping, i don't feel like anything i'm doing is right. i've managed to fight with my mom every day the last 2 weeks, i've gotten into a fight with two of my best friends over something that was completely retarded, the boy i love, actually, i'm not ready to talk about that yet... everything is a mess. all of my friends are starting to think i'm suicidal because i'm always depressed about something, or i'm always pissed off and complaining.
yesterday wasn't so bad, i'm still upset about a certain subject, but my friends took my mind off of that. elise came over after school for a little while, then she had to go home and watch her little brother, then her, kelly, and jenna wound up coming over at night and we went driving around for a while.
today, i'm heading into boston on the train with kelly, elise, and henry, it should be a good time. i've hung out with henry like two times, but it was like 2 years ago, and me and him have never been friends or anything. later tonight me, kelly, jenna, and elise are heading over to matt's house and hanging out, and elise is gonna sleep over here.
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