| Current mood: |  depressed |
| Current music: | Christopher Jordan, WSAR Fall River, MA. April, 1974 |
Let's Californicate
That line, Let's Californicate, was bound to happen sooner or later, with sooner being the better of the two options and I give the writer of this one (Californication Season 5 Episode 6 Love Song: http://www.sho.com/site/californication/episodes.sho?episodeid=139055&) a lot of credit for making it happen as soon as possible. Albeit in a flashback and while some critics split hairs over that, calling the technique such things lazy tacked-on afterthoughts, I don't have a problem with it.
What I do have a problem with (Still) is Hank being hung up on Karen. I admit that sometimes I get swept up into the whole grandly tragic torture that Hank can never recover from but it's always seemed artificial and forced to me. Of all of the girls Hank sleeps with, he and Karen have the least amount of chemistry. Sometimes it's zero.
And I've explained that away before by saying that it's because she can't stand him anymore but it's getting more and more difficult to do that. Especially now that she's ready to dump Richard for one little teeny tiny barely even embarrassing transgression that wasn't even his fault...His---If his, Karen's and Hank's luck stays the same as it has always been---future step son-in-law switched glasses with him to see if he really acted crazy when he's drunk...which involved him stripping naked in a fancy restaurant, getting up on the table and admitting to long going homosexual affairs he started while in prison doing research for a novel.
Oh, and he can't or won't stop drinking. Hasn't anyone ever told Karen that relapse is part of recovery? Especially when you're tricked into drinking again? Or is she just as flighty and opportunistic as everyone is accusing her of being? Like when she left Bill at the alter to ride off with Hank into the sunset?
I'm not saying it's not nice to see someone doing something more stupid and humiliating than Hank, a job that usually falls to Charlie but this time (Actually it was last week but who's counting?) he can hold his head high and say, "Yeah, maybe I did get a blowjob from a transvestite in the backseat of a stolen cop car while impersonating a detective but that's nothing compared to stripping naked in the middle of a crowded restaurant and THEN somehow not realize that on the wagon is a good place to be," I'm just saying that it's getting harder and harder to believe that Hank wouldn't just forget about him and Karen.
I know the writers are trying to maintain a Heathcliff and Catherine situation but more and more it's like Heathcliff and Heathcliffette. I still say that they need to give Karen serious competition...If only they had made her a little less psycho, Carrie would have been perfect for it...to straighten her out. Or Hank. Or both of them.
But does anyone ever consult me? No. Never. So let's talk about Kali. Maybe she could be the one who could get serious about Hank in a serious enough way to shake up Karen? Scoff if you want but she seems remarkably well balanced and they do make beautiful music together.
Kids, don't try that at home. I know I make it look easy but I'm a pro and if an amateur like you tried to construct a metaphor like that, you'd just crash and burn. And if they keep writing lyrics like that together, they could be the next Lennon and McCartney...Well, OK, how about the next Elton John and Bernie Taupin. One of them just has to learn to write music because I don't think Sam is going to do it anymore after he wakes up to what's going on and who among us, especially Hank, couldn't use a new revenue stream like that?
Especially since he has to re-buy Becca's love all over again. And I don't think it's going to be on sale this time. I think we're probably talking cars, condo's and new wardrobes at this point. Then there's jewelry and summers in Europe. The possibilities are pretty limitless. So Hank has to pretty much write another hit novel that someone is going to want to make into a movie or write more hit songs.
Or both. But let us not lose sight of what really matters here: The sight of Kali's butt. Which we still haven't seen yet---at least not a clear up-close lengthy shot of it completely uncovered---and if she were living with Hank, that would be inevitable. So why won't they let me write and direct this show?
It's just another clear-cut case of God hating us all. And even if us atheists are right and there is no God to hate us, it doesn't matter because it works out to be the same thing.
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