| Current mood: |  tired |
10 minutes
I have approximately ten minutes to write before I have to go to work. Is it just me, or does society have massive ADD? I hate having a job for more than a year... definitely no more than two. I am so close to being done with this job (nannying) even though I have a close companionship with the girls. It's like... I start to feel depressed if I stay in one place for too long. My body yearns to do something new... be somewhere different. Is this going to be a problem my whole life? I want to keep my grad assistantship job... but I guess that's a little different, I get to spend a lot of time by myself at work, and I like being by myself.
I love taking care of kids, too, but on Friday there was a guinea pig (who should STILL be there today) and there was dog crap that I stepped in and got on my hands, simultaneously, there was throwup on the floor because Beatrice smelled the poo. Then there was fighting and teething and... LONG day.
This weekend was Jesse and I's 7 month anniversary, officially marking this relationship as my longest ever. Woo hoo! I was a little disappointed because he couldnt save money to even get me anything, and I had put a lot of effort into making it really nice for him. :( We did have sushi and icecream, however.
Also-- I babysat for Nathan on Saturday. I was so excited that they called me, because I hadnt seen him in probably 5 months or so. It was a treat. The kids were so well-behaved, too. Nathan remembered me and it was nice to spend time with him. He is so adorable. He was talking SO much, which is a huge change from the last time I saw him, so it was really great to see him developing and have conversations with him. I hope they call me again. :)
Sometimes I hate birth control. It controls the possibility of birth occuring, but it also seems to dictate my moodswings.. I feel depressed on days for no reason whatsoever, and on other days my libido is raging and I am wide awake and happy. Like I used to be. But it seems more often than not that I am down, tired, and libido-less. This seems to be why today I am fantasizing about having a new job... and not having to go in at all. I have to be there a half hour early today because she called and asked if I could. Which is fine, because its more money for me, but gahhh.
I did absolutely nothing yesterday except lay in bed with Jesse, go out to dinner, and drink wine/work on our scrapbook I bought for us. It was one of the nicest, most relaxing days ever. I havent had a day like that in eons, because my weekends are usually just as busy as my weekdays, which are incredibly busy.
I feel really selfish sometimes, but I just want a week to myself, where I don't have to go to work (Either job) I dont have to go to class, and I don't have to drive to Southbridge to take care of my mom. Heck, I'd love it if my parents went away that week, as well, and then I could be truly satisfied. Relaxed and happy. But life doesn't work that way!!!!
Looks as if Im not getting out of the house any time soon. I am starting to seriously doubt Jesse's ability to save money/use it wisely. It hurts me, because I am trying so hard to save and do this and that.. and he's basically blowing a lot of it and the rest is going to bills... I could probably GET the apartment, but I doubt that I'd be able to sustain it on my income. Ive been saving, but it is going to go fast, especially since I am only taking one class next semester, which means that I will be part-time and will not get my discount... :( I think that is LAME-O.
Okay, well I rambled enough... and actually for 12 minutes... but that's okay. Time to get ready for my day. It shouldn't be so bad, I get home at 3. Have some alone time and then have to be off to class until 9.. but next week there should be NO class.. so that will be refreshing. I'm always looking for that thing that will help me hang on...it seems...
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