Moni (unjudgable8265) wrote, @ 2004-10-11 21:48:00

Current mood:	alone
Current music:	bowling for soup '1985

i went to therapy today. blah ba humbug
he told me i have a castle built up to keep myself from trusting people. theres only 2 people in this 'castle' one is cassie blauch and the other well im not gonna tell u who he is but im not even in the damn castle. once someone betrays my trust i blame it on myself for trusting them in the first place, so therefore i blame it on myself loosing trust in me. i cant believe i dont trust myself. but ohh well the 2 people in there, well i no cassie isnt leaving ever. and well the second person even if he wants out i cant let him, ahh the wonders of love. ugh, and also the person that i love im afraid to tell him im in love with him. my therapist along with Mattie and Lee tell me im afraid of being hurt. ohh boy if only they knew. the only person who does no is the one i love. and i very well cant go telling him that i love him but im afraid of rejection should i tell him im in love with him or not? hmm well that defeats the whole screwy purpose. that would be telling him and putting myself out there when the whole thing was just for advice. no i think ill tell my therapist about all this next visit.
cassie is great she just doesnt really no how i feel about the only thing. i no her phone life isnt dandy. but she has great friends and a kewl boyfriend from what ive seen.

	thankx mon sasslvs7 2004-10-11 21:53 (link)
	thankx mon.. i know youve felt like that.... but i never knew that you were like that....lol.... well i love yah to.. (Reply to this) (Thread)