| Current mood: |  amused |
Indeed it is 2004
Oh yes, it is a new year. Indeed it is. New years eve was actually enjoyable. I spent the afternoon with Michelle at the mall as we met with this one girl and her big man friend that were both friends of the little sara. I got to listen to many conversations about ciggies, pot, drinking, piercing, and of course... sex. Oh michelle is as messed up as the rest of them...
Here is a story or THE story...
Michelle liked jason and he lived with her because his parents kicked him out. Yes, that was very nice. They went out, they broke up, they went out, they had sex, he stole things for her, they broke up. Then Michelle slept with his best friend. He left a dirty message upon her cell phone calling her a dirty slut and hoped she would die and such things. Michelle has many cuts on her wrist. She wants to die. Jason went straight edge. Michelle wants to kill him. I personally think perhaps michelle brought this upon herself because she cheats, because you don't just sleep with someone's best friend... to get back at them. Yes, she just wanted to make him hurt. Yes, michelle does do drugs and drink... why do you ask? oh. THE END.
The new people we met smoked outside. we got to talk to a janitor that works at the mall. Interesting stories she had to tell us. then we went inside. Michelle got invited to a party, she wanted me to come to bond. Pot, drinking, and dick oh my. I told her i was going to carmela's party. I did in fact want to go to the party with michelle. I was rather interested in seeing what was there. She said i didn't have to try anything... but i know if i went... i would. thats part of the reason i didn't go. Anyways, michelle would be driving, under whatever influence... road blocks everywhere... hey, maybe i should call and see if she's alright. oops. Also, i would have come home and my parents live there. lol. Uh huh. Maybe another time sista.
Yes, i went to Carmela's party with jennifer and brian there and the occasional appearance of tiffany and angel. I admit, i did not want to go at first. I was not sure if i could handle seeing her and brian together. I didn't know if i could take it... not having her constantly upon my arm. But i went and survived. At the little party I didn't really think of it. I did, but it did bother me. I saw her and brian together and it made me see more how much it couldn't have been. I had fun. I enjoyed my time. I ate many foot roll ups. I sang a song on the karoke machince... bootilicious and wherever, whenever. Her parents were surprised i could sing. Many secrets lie within me, as you see. lol. I was happy with my performance. Brian sang... but i sing better than he. lol. Jen and carmela danced tha ddr. lol. Then... it was almost 12. her mom poured tha wine coolers and we toasted as the ball fell. aw. then we went back for more and because carmela and brina kissed, i kissed jen's head. And then we all kissed each other. I was actually surprised that i thought of that. You always need your new years kiss. Then we poured another drink. this time, Her mom made mine hawaiin themed with pine apples and fruit stuck on an Umbrella!!!! It was tasty. then we went outside and tiff and angel were humping everyone... but not me. Oh wait... before that we walked to jen's house and drank some of her mom's mudslide and then some hard lemonade. Mmmm. Then everyone, but me got humped. It was rather funny. Jen put a Christmas tree in the porter potty. I hid under the boat and not i have bruises and scraps on my knee. I laughed a lot. My butt got groped, as everyone elses did. we all were rather insane. then me, brian, jen, and carmela sat on this thing and they talked. I bleched (sp). Apparently the 7 foot roll ups and fruity alcohol didn't mix well. I made some interesting sounds with my throat. Then it got cold. We went inside. Tiff and angel sing scarey. We all sang together... i sang YELLOW!! Then they played ddr more. then Final fantasy. Tried to lipstick brian when he fell asleep, but that didn't work. Stayed up all night. Went home at about 7, fell asleep, and woke up when mother came home at 3. FUN FUN.
It was actually fun. I'm glad i didn't skip out. I would have missed pillow fights and food. Carmela says it sucked, and i perhaps should have went with michelle. yes, because i'm such a pothead. *cough cough* It didn't suck and its just sad when you think your own party sucks. tist tist.
I learned things from the party and realized things too. Carmelas mom actually provided me with something i already knew about carmela and what my mom told me. She causes drama. Perhaps this is why i feel for jason with what michelle did. He said he loved her, but she was fucking him up and he had to break it off with her to start clean. I know exactly how that feels. I do. I've lived it. My friends do things that make me think sometimes... they are not very good people. I know they have problems and they are hurting. But they're being assholes. Instead of figuring out their problem and dealing with the pain and healing themselves... they go insane... they fuck people, smoke pot for days to forget about it, drink it away. well... those are all in michelle's case at the moment. For the moment and such, carmela seemed stable. It makes me wonder... why am i so attracted to drama? Yes, mr. kris roe from the atris, i ask myself that question too. My moms psyhcologist says we're attracted to people who cause drama. I don't know why exactly. I'm beginning to be scared with what type of friends i'm making. Most of them, cause no drama and don't go insane. we all have problems... but they're scaring me. Really people, the worlds people are frighting me. the last day of 2003 was an eye opener in a way. Perhaps everything i learned during that year just brust forth, like a summery of some sort and a chapter was added to my life. So to summerize last year....
It was the best times, it was the worst of times. lol. I had fun. I laughed. Made new friends, on internet and off. Fell in love. Cried. Traveled. Found my soul. realized a little bit of what i want to do with my life. Drank a little too much. Became so happy. Realized, i am not the straightest person you know. I just happen to like girls. Developed some sort of style on my own. Became a little less shy. Went insane. Became rather mellow. Started to know myself. I learned to smile. I learned I can do anything I want. I listened to music. Awesome orgasmic concerts. Wrote songs that sucked. Somehow developed a bit of high selfesteem. Learned some people aren't worth fighting. People just suck in general sometimes. Learned there are assholes everywhere. Been introduced to new and not so cool experiences. Realized... i should just be asexual. Found love in a friend and still a friend afterwards. Learned we all need to communicate a little better and not be such assholes to one another. The world is suffering and so are its people.
Weee... asshole. lol. When some girls who claimed they liked girls get boyfriends, they think liking girls is gross. Lesbian sex is hot, soorrry. Bitches. lol
Happy happy NEW YEAR! You know you enjoy it. Be happy! One more year until i graduate. OOO the scariness. I could be ruling your world soon!!! ah ha ha ha ha.
Goodnight loves. Peace be with you.
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