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naif (sleepless77) wrote,
@ 2007-03-21 06:19:00
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    If all goes well, I'll be in NTU SCI (School of Communication and Information) this August, for an Undergrad and eventually Masters course.

    I am so looking forward to being in school again! Here are my resolutions:

    1) Buy pencilbox.

    2) If taking Drama Minor at NIE, deliberately fail when asked to write essay on Robert Yeo.

    3) Tell whoever is conducting CDP202 at NIE that in their survey of 'leading companies' in Singapore theatre, 'Theatre Ox' is a bit out--considering that founder Ang Gey Pin has fled and is now based at the Grotowski Workcentre in Italy and a few remaining members have sort of regrouped under 'In-Source Theatre'. Also, ask whoever is conducting CDP101, 'Who IS Michael Chekov?'

    4) Take electives at ADM under Lucy Davis and come to class wearing SIA kebaya.

    5) Tell people who don't know better that the WKW in WKWSCI (That's the Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information) stands for Wong Kar Wai.

    6) For Singapore Studies module, ask tutor whether can pass up 'Homesick' as homework. (Yi-Sheng says it's better read than watched, so pass up script instead of DVD) (I know it's 'hand in' and not 'pass up' but 'pass up' is such an irresistible Singaporeanism!)

    7) Scatter lallang seeds on grassy roof of ADM building. Mimosa seeds also--to prevent couples frolicking on roof on Valentine's.

    8) Talk to Chinaman/Chinawoman in Malay, smile but say really nasty things like, (to man) 'Do all of you go to the same barber', (to woman) 'Do all of you buy windbreakers from the same shop?'

    9) Turn at least one corridor in Hall of Residence into mini nudist colony.

    10) March in front of ADM building with fellow SCI students yelling, 'We Rock, You Suck!'

    11) Find secret mass grave of communists somewhere on the NTU campus.

    12) Reply to person on IRC who types 'anyone in NTU?' When exchanging pics, send photo of Chinaman.

    13) Feign ignorance if ever Journalism Faculty Head Cherian George asks, 'Is it true you once sent my wife Zuraidah Ibrahim a one-line email that said, 'You are the new Chua Mui Hoong'?'

    14) For Final Year Project, convince a group of people (consisting of folks that you don't like) to produce an ad campaign supporting female circumcision.

    15) In wriggling way out of writing Hall Musical, offer instead to give it 'a favourable review' on blog; eg. Two Thumbs Up for "Chinaman of Letters!"

    16) Watch NTU dragonboat team train to detox from alarming 9:1 ratio of females to males in SCI.

    17) For internship, ask if can do at ISD. When asked why, look incredulous and say, 'But every Straits Times journalist worth his or her salt went there!'

    18) For the 'Basic Media Writing in Chinese' module, when asked to write assignments, copy out articles from Lianhe Wanbao and pass up as my own work (My response to essay question 'What Role Does the Internet Play in Challenging The Dominance of Mainstream Media?' will be 'Security Guard Rapes 70-Year-Old Grandmother')

    19) Invite Andy Ho to give talk. Introduce him to audience as Andy Ho Mo Phobe. Or Andy Ho Mo Fo.

    20) Get Brian, Junfeng, Zihan, Royston, Ash to do my homework. Remember to say pretty please.

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2007-03-21 15:16 (link)
You're damn bad about the Chinese nationals can! Why don't you get your posse to Queer Eye them one by one and present the results as a conceptual art project?


(Reply to this) (Thread)

2007-03-21 15:28 (link)
Hahaha. I was bitching about Chinamen with some friends and a friend told me, 'Alfian, it's all in the Little Red Book! Got 'where to get haircut' and 'where to buy windbreakers'.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

2007-03-21 21:47 (link)
Yesterday I was in City Hall MRT and I saw a bunch of really tall supermodel-like China boys and girls... I tell you, it was spectacular. I was so inspired that I just stopped and stared and wished i could go lengthen my thigh bones and go for a nose job. It looked like a scene from 5th Element cuz these creatures were so ethereal. Beauty is like geometry. It's all about lines and angles.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

2007-03-22 01:14 (link)
That's before they open their mouths and you hear that kettlewhistle, guttural-R's inflections.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

2007-03-21 23:59 (link)
You fall in love with one then I laugh.

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2007-03-22 02:10 (link)
Line and angles and perfect spheres, with stubbly hair.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

2007-03-22 03:24 (link)
I had some really hot sex with one in the Stamford House disabled toilet. He was very cool, actually. Granted, he's been here since Sec 3 and he's kinda gone native.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

2007-03-22 12:30 (link)
*Takes notes*: 'Stamford House...disabled toilet...' Got it.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

2007-03-22 13:07 (link)
U eveel! But I like 7, 11, 12 and 13. And about the China people... so true! I was walking to canteen 2 when I saw the wife of one donno postgrad or lecturer or what pulling down the shorts of her son and getting him to pee on the grass patch next to the road. I was like "Wah lao! This is Singapore's Nantah, not China's Beidah leh!"

(Reply to this) (Thread)

2007-03-22 14:49 (link)
That is what Chinese mothers do what.

Malay mothers:

Feed child at playground. Bowl of mashed up rice. Talk to another Malay mother. Feed one spoonful, child will run around, play swing slide sand for fifteen minutes. Mother suddenly remembers she's feeding child. Screams: 'Don't keep in your mouth, swallow your food!' Child comes back for another spoonful. Repeat.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

2007-03-23 02:27 (link)
CDP 202 is taught by Charlene R. and no, we don't cover theatre OX. hahaha tell me when you going to scatter mimosa seed ok..... hahha... i help act as look out

(Reply to this) (Thread)

2007-04-23 09:26 (link)
ref no.8 : you shld go to hwachong. some seriously messed up kids. non-chinese = alien. on days where they 'import' malay kids from some neighbourhood school for 'racial understanding', the boys hide in their classes cos they cant be bothered to interact. racial integration, man.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

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2011-07-24 21:02 (link)
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