ShiannE (shigal) wrote, @ 2004-01-14 21:18:00

heh - I just tried starting off this entry with about 5 diff. sentences...

Im so scatter-brained right now. It's ridiculous. I think its best that I procede in bullet format:

- Ive lost about 5lbs.. and although that may not sound like an accomplishment - it is to me because I can see/feel the difference.. and the hardest part of anything is getting started

- I am starting school on the 20th for sure now. My assessment test put me into the highest entry-level english class [out of about 4 diff. ranks], and the lowest mathematics lol - which I assumed would happen. I decided only on 2 classes this semester though; Ive been out so long I wanted to make sure I do it right and get back into the swing of things. Also, the school had a typo on my social security number, so it took FOREVER to get classes. I ended up taking English [duh] and a Humanities class about religion, novels, mythology and all of that good stuff [details later]. So Im psyched and nervous at the same time.

- Strangely Ive wanted to be alone lately.. avoiding hanging out with my two best friends.. avoiding going to Fremont altogether... this I cannot explain because even I havent figured it out yet. Im just worried that this isnt some "serious" issue im having..

- Ryan and I ? I dont think that both of us know anymore. He has come into this new confidence and Im glad for him.. and I think he wants something better.. and I think I want something different. We both have an issue ever letting go though. Safety net? Unsure... makes me either numb or sad to think about it though..

- sometimes I wish my mind didnt race so much, so that I just didnt know better... ugh tonight is a good night to drink wine until I fall asleep - too bad in not 21 yet

ps. I didnt post with a pic because I wasnt sure if that was getting annoying yet.. I do have this great one of a streetlight [outside my house], in the night-time fogg... hmm o well

pss. On Sex & The City - Carrie's new boyfriend, Aleksandar, is my ABSOLUTE dream man. Oh Yes - he's foreign, well-traveled, articulate, intelligent, comical, into poetry, plays the piano, romantic, attractive - ah too bad movies / shows arent real =)

nogonzo 2004-01-15 16:32 (link)

Congrats on getting into the English class. I was wondering whether you had been able to get into it or not, due the the whole Technology Breakdown. I'm with you on the mind-racing thought. Sometimes I have so much stuff going on and slithering around my head and in my thoughts that sleep seems helpless and impossible. And I've found that alcohol works about fifty (50) percent of the time. Half the time, it will bring peace and sleep. The other half, it seems to team up with everything else, and just make Life (and the Night) a pain in one's ass. The pics haven't annoyed me...but I can't speak for everyone. I am easily amused I imagine. (Reply to this) (Thread)