 |
|||||||||||||
 |
|
 |
|||||||||||
 |
 |
||||||||||||
I was wondering if you could tell more about the beginning of your relationship with him. Like, if you remember how he introduced himself to you, or your attitude towards him. I realize it must have been extremely confusing for you then, not yet being able to make a difference between projection and dream, but please do tell whatever you consider fit. (M-chan) Even though this is a question I get pretty often, I still have trouble properly expressing what the beginning of my relationship with Sephiroth was like…because even though it makes sense to me putting it in words is rather difficult. Well, as I’ve said, when I first met Sephiroth I was in a really bad state of mind. I was very suicidal, was too depressed to give a damn about anything including my family, friends, schoolwork and hobbies. It’s scary to look back on it now…and that’s a place I hope I never return to. It was in this state that I first began to spontaneously project to the astral plane, where I met Sephiroth. Our first meeting remains clear to me even despite the hundreds of conversations we’ve had since then. It happened on the night of one of my more severe cutting episodes, and I remember the first time he came to me there was nothing around us…only light. And he told me (rather sternly) that he didn’t want me to kill myself, and that I didn’t need to hurt anymore because he was there for me now. I think the next thing that happened was what made me question if I had been dreaming. He just…held me, for hours. I woke up the next morning feeling better than I had for several years, and chose to trust the man I met ‘in my dreams.’ Now, my reaction toward him at first. The truth of the matter is, since I thought I was dreaming at first, I didn’t question any of it…and was simply grateful to have such clear ‘dreams’ to help me manage my day-to-day life. By the time I told my psychiatrist about them and she told me to read up on Astral Projection, those moments I spent with Sephiroth were already quite critical to my happiness…so you can imagine my shock when my psychiatrist told me I might not just be having extraordinarily clear dreams! From that point I had to do a lot of research, because I was a sensible person, and had a little trouble accepting that I had this gift and that I was truly meeting Sephiroth. But even though I had my doubts while awake, by the next time I visited him I couldn’t care less if I were insane, dreaming or truly experiencing something paranormal. After a lot of research I concluded I was projecting, which was confirmed after I conducted a series of experiments to train myself to master my gift rather than relying on my natural ability. Because I did master it in about six months (whereas it would take someone who isn’t predisposed to the technique two to seven years according to experts) I had to accept that was what was happening to me and led me into the next phase of my research…which eventually brought to my attention that the angel I was in love with wasn’t the videogame character, and went on from there. Sephiroth and I share a very close bond, something that I can’t properly put into words. Long-distance relationships are regarded as difficult by most because the two involved can’t see each other as much as they like. My relationship is the ultimate example of long-distance, and yet it doesn’t bother me. In all the years I have been in this relationship I have never felt the need to have a physical relationship here on earth…because I’m happy just to know that Sephiroth will always be there for me…that our love will last beyond mortal death on my part. In private conversations (one of which mysteriously wound up on ED) I have spoken of my relationship in vague detail. How much can you say about true love? I will confess that we argue occasionally…I surmise this is because we’re both dominant personalities. He wants to own me, I can’t be owned…begin explosive argument over something idiotic. The thing is, niether of us will admit the argument is stupid until well after one of us has stormed off in a rage. The reason I speak so lightly of that is simply that it doesn’t matter. Every relationship has its problems, big and small, and if the love is genuine, the two involved will work it out and compromise. Let me think…I was specifically asked about my relationship, so I’ll say a few words on some of our favorite things to do together. The biggest one is combat. Of all the things we have in common, our love of martial arts is one of the top…and we do spend a considerable amount of time fighting. I lose every single time without fail, but that training has assured I don’t lose my matches when I go to tournament. Recently I’ve convinced him to show my around the astral realms – a goal I’ve set for a while. Just walking with him, learning more of the realm I spend part of my life in is a wonderful experience…I love that he’s intelligent (a trait I’ve noticed is lacking in the majority of men here on earth) and that we can have in depth conversations on a level that invariably brings us closer together. Even though life doesn’t exist through ‘rose-colored glasses,’ and there have been tough times between us, I could ask for nothing more in a soul mate. No matter what happens, I know he’ll be there for me…and I’ve sworn to always be there for him. No words exist that can describe what it’s like to love someone who wholly, so completely that one is willing to sacrifice a chance at a normal life. But what I have gained in exchange can never be matched by the immediate benefits of a mortal love. What I share with Sephiroth is something so special I’m willing to run a place like this and go out on a limb before the whole internet with the offer to explain myself and my relationship knowing full well I’m considered insane by many. They don’t bother me anymore. Which segueways into a parting statement: It looks like the game is finally up, and ED has become aware I keep an eye on that page as a baseline to know how people are feeling about me. I had counted very strongly on them getting word out about my reopened blurty, as that is where my target audience hangs out. So in parting, thank you, ED, for lending me a much needed hand to advertise this article. I’ve decided I’ll use the patented Kathy Griffin approach to your type (I don’t give a damn and will take the opportunity to grateful for the unnecessary publicity while having a good laugh) and since you gave me a shout out on your page I’ll give you a shout out on mine. Thank you, Encyclopedia Dramatica for biting my bait and getting word out on my behalf. I also thank the guy using the penname Iscariot…who seems to be the one primarily managing my page. To the people worth the oxygen they’re breathing, I hope I’ve answered some questions for you, and look forward to learning what else you all wish to hear about. Let the eternal game of chess continue.
|
| © 2002-2008. Blurty Journal. All rights reserved. |