Say You Love Me (sayyouloveme) wrote, @ 2004-10-28 01:59:00

I am so sitting here
I am sitting here. I think it is much easier to type than write in a real journal. But I just love the real journal.

Today was ... boring

I have so much homework to do, but I have done none.

I might go to Avril tomorrow. WOOOOOOOOO.. he's just a skater boi.

There are many things that I miss. I miss the firsts. I miss that first time that we went to play pool... I was scared to grab your hand and skip with you. I miss that first time you touched my hand. It was in the car after the 420 monks first show I think. You put your arm around me that night too. That was so sweet.

Now it is like a wonderful stable friendship. It isn't as exciting but it is wonderful and comforting.

I miss April and my apartment and my trying to succeed in school by not doing homework.

I miss going out all the time and stupid shows.

I feel old. I can't wait until I graduate when I have a career and can just party after work every night!

I mean who knows if it will last, but there is always hope.

I have been tired all day and now it is 2 am. why am I still up?

I screwed up my guitar today. Now I can do the whammy bar backwards! It is much cooler that way. Justin helped me with the adjustment.

I need a photo of a kid in a wheelchair.

Gonna be a drunk ladybug on Saturday. I can't wait. I wish I could be 10 pounds fitter.. skinnier whatever by then though. Not gonna happen.

The only bad thing I had today was 1 cookie. Yes, 1 cookie. Oh and half a milkshake thing,but it was just half... I am trying!

I discovered that I am a person that sucks today. I am an internal locus of control. That means that .. supposedly I believe that my successes or failures are caused largely as a result of external factors such as luck, other people's actions or the diffiuclty of the situation. I hate that education class. Is that me being internal? I believe that I am to blame for my successes. I am the one too stupid to do my homework, it isn't my teachers fault. sure they can be picky, but it is because they want us to learn. I am a fucking external locus of control!

Oh and there is this chart. It has different intelligence categories. I believe mine is...Intrapersonal. Of course it has no job to go with it. The famous person who has it is Mother Teresa. (my idle for real) Ability ot understand oneself, know who oneself is, know strenghts and limitations. It also says self-discipline.. yeah I don't do that. The things we do are.. read books, independent projects, write in journals, be a friend. Find quite places for reflection. Now what kind of job can I get with this "intelligence?"

Me too!! shred_head 2004-10-28 02:34 (link)

Sure you love your real journal more, but I can't read your real journal. So obviously, which one is better? I didn't do any homework either, I tried to start but it was so boring that I couldn't concentrate. Could be a good show, I still like her first album and a few songs off her new one. Will be lots of kids there though, you'll love it! I miss a lot of things. But every time I see you I still get excited, that hasn't changed a bit for me. I'm gonna be a drunk hardcore kid on Saturday. I wish I could be 10 pounds heavier, except only with muscle. I had 2 poptarts, I wish I didn't eat them. I remember learning about locus of control in my psychology classes. I almost picked you has an external locus of control. I think I'm the same. Now I remember why I didn't like psychology...cuz it's boring. Can't wait to see you!!! (Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Me too!! sayyouloveme 2004-10-28 02:44 (link)

That means that my real journal is better.. hah I looked at a lot of homework. It is overwhelming! I think you are jealous and want to see Avril. What do you miss Justy? I bet you miss my hair always getting in your face. Remember that? If you get to be 10 pounds heavier, I get to weigh that much too. One day I am going to be one cute fat lady. I so think I have external locus of control. That survey was biased and bad. You loved that class. Ready to get drunk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)