|Current mood:|| discontent|
|Current music:||6:00 by Dreamtheater|
So Many Ways to Drown
Sometimes, I suppose, you look back on your life and you wonder why you're the way that you are. Is it due to the consequences of your actions, or is it just fate? Sometimes, you wake up and you wonder why you're there; if you're supposed to be where you are. Sometimes you wonder if you're supposed to be you. Or if you're supposed to be alive.
What's the secret to happiness?
You could say that it's knowing and being able to deal with the fact that you're in a functional state of dishamony and that you're working against all logical forces of nature. You could say it's religion. Occupation. Hobby. Friends. Family. Love. Personally, I think it has something to do with complacency. And god knows I've tried to be complacent to no avail.
I guess the reason behind life is something that I will never discover, along with the happiness that I so covet in those who have found it. I guess I'm just one of those who will never be satisfied, and who has to survive with what I have until something better dares rear its head.
Am I looking for a sign; a prophecy? A mentality? An answer? Or will I never know, because it is eternally hidden?
Every moment spent lonely, but never in seclusion. I suppose that's what it all comes down to for people like me. Every moment like the last, no moment like the next. Chaotic dissonance.
There's got to be more to life than all that I despise.....all that I see....
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