|Current mood:|| blank|
Went to the doctors and the doctor said...no more monkeys jumping on the bed...
uhh no not really, but I did went to the doctors and the doctor did said that she reckons I'm depressed. Big surprise there. Well actually it kind of was....but then, not really. Probably doesn't seem like it at all from most of my posts. BUT I only post here when I can be bothered....still I don't even put all the shitty things that happen to me/I think/feel/do, or lack of doing on lj. If I did I disturb even more people. (should I care about that? I think not but I still end up thinking it, and I sure as hell know that they think along certain lines as well). All my negativity in particular....
She kept asking me if I have had thoughts about suicide and hurting myself. Honestly. I said I have in the past but I decided I don't want to kill myself, if I can decide such a thing...anyway I decided it wasn't worth it for me...Who doesn't fucking thing about suicide and death? Anyway, she probably has to ask those kind of questions.
Shes making me go back again next week to see if I'm 'feeling better'. Good days are a fucking rarity. I think she is trying to make me have counselling as well. God knows how I'm going to be able to afford all these dr visits and what not. That probably contributes to all this she as well. She also thinks I'm homesick. I have never been homesick in my life, so what the hell!? I suppose theres the first time for everything works like that as well.
On the other hand my other illness, the 'viral' thing seems to be gone. My back no longer aches like hell for no apparent reason...appart from when I slouch, but thats just bad posture I hope.
I miss chat programs..
I could go on for a long while but I suppose I should get on with finishing my piece of shit lab assignment so I don't have to worry about that. One less thing. hurray. ...maybe I will later..
It's raining outside. I wish I was there
how fucking relevant. I love NIN. Might go listen to some later...
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