Nicholas (nicky_brendon) wrote, @ 2003-07-21 05:27:00

Current mood:	awake
Current music:	Kelly snoring

It's insanely late. Or more correctly, insanely early. Kelly is fast asleep, softly snoring, tangled up in the bedsheets and blankets, clutching my pillow. I'm not sure how I managed to slip away unnoticed, but I succeeded. I was asleep, but I keep waking up. And then I toss and turn, and can't fall back asleep. I haven't slept well in at least a month or so. I just keep mulling this situation over in my head. I hurt an important person in my life, without ever having the intention of doing so. Tressa is a special girl, and she deserves better than what she has. I've gotten her tied down, filled her with false hopes...everything is just based around and built on lies. I thought that I could love her. But I was wrong. I mean, I do love her. But I'm in love with her. I've known all my life that no one could compete with Kelly for my affections. I can't help the bond that's there, that crosses all the lines and blurs them together. He's always going to be the most important person in my life. I'll always love him more than anyone else because he literally is a part of me...as well as figuratively. Naturally this is a hard concept for a woman to grasp about her husband. She may never forgive me...I truly doubt she could...but I hope we can at least reconcile to an extent. I haven't spoken to her since the day she told me it would be best if I didn't stop home for awhile. I'm giving her room, giving her time. I figure she'll contact me when she's ready. I'm never certain about how women operate, they tend to be tricky, but I'm thinking this is the best approach.

Anyway, on a lighter note...the road trip was a lovely getaway. I think it was something Kelly and I both needed. It didn't take my mind off of everything entirely, but it did help. And I can now say I have some fond memories of the Grand Canyon. Heh.

We went to a Common Rotation gig the other day. Always a great performance by Adam and the band! I always did like Adam when he wasn't clocking me in the jaw ;) Anyway. There wasn't an obscene amount of drinking this time. I wasn't in the mood to get drunk, or to deal with a drunk Kelly, so I made him go easy. Beside, no time to drink when you're bumping and grinding to the music! And oh did we bump and grind...and then we bumped and grinded with the Lenk brothers. Good times, my friends,...good times. It really was fun. I think I was successfully able to let go of all my worries for a couple hours and just have some good, genuine fun.

I think Kelly's starting to notice my absence from the bed in his slumber as he's making whimpering noises. I swear, I'm not sure how he's ever able to survive without me around 24/7. Not that I mind taking care of him, and being with him. So yeah, I'm not complaining. Heh. Ok. Sleep now.

	lenked 2003-07-21 18:03 (link)
	:/ I'm glad you had fun on your trip at least. ::hugs:: You and Kelly are great dancers. :x I'm glad my spasming dancing could help you forget about things for a while. :) (Reply to this) (Thread)

	nicky_brendon 2003-07-22 01:27 (link)
	:hugs: Thanks. So am I. Your dancing was good too. We should hang out more. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lenked 2003-07-22 21:21 (link)
	Really? ::grins:: I'd like that! A lot! We could work out or something :p (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nicky_brendon 2003-07-23 01:33 (link)
	Yeah God knows I need to! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lenked 2003-07-23 01:35 (link)
	...::stares at icon:: Um. You don't need to! You're still...really...hot...Not! Not hot!...Attractive. In that...platonic...guy...way...::nods:: (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nicky_brendon 2003-07-23 01:40 (link)
	:blinks: Uh...thanks... (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lenked 2003-07-23 01:41 (link)
	::blushes, nodding:: Anytime... ...So...about that working out thing...::cough:: (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nicky_brendon 2003-07-23 01:46 (link)
	Sure, why not. I've been meaning to go with Kelly to the gym sometime...you'd be more than welcome to come along! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lenked 2003-07-23 01:47 (link)
	...You...and...Kelly...? ......I....I need......to.....go......do....the thing...... Yeah. That thing. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nicky_brendon 2003-07-23 01:54 (link)
	Uh....right...heh...the thing. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kelly_d 2003-07-23 01:55 (link)
	You should use that shirtless icon more often. And Tom... you are a strange, strange man. Who is more than welcome to... work out... with me and Nick. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nicky_brendon 2003-07-23 01:58 (link)
	I will just for you. Is that a hidden implication I see there, Kel? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lenked 2003-07-23 02:07 (link)
	::blushes:: I swear! I didn't mean it like that!! ::Frowns:: (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kelly_d 2003-07-23 02:07 (link)
	You're so good to me. Not that I really need an icon, when I've got the real thing staying in my apartment... Might've been. Would you be opposed if it was? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lenked 2003-07-23 02:09 (link)
	::cries:: I just want to get buff! Is that so wrong?! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nicky_brendon 2003-07-23 02:16 (link)
	Danny might be opposed to it, but I don't think I would be. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lenked 2003-07-23 02:22 (link)
	O_O ::blushes more:: Damn you both! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)