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davie jane (nerder) wrote,
@ 2003-06-02 12:33:00
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    crap.
    ugh. i found out that my friend micheal likes me. micheal is a really cool guy and everything but i just dont like him like that. i just dont have the heart to say anything to him. i dont know if it would make him or break him. i've never known of anyone who has liked me. micheal might just be the first that i know of. i've known him since elementry school and this year was the first year that i really got o know him. and im sort of confused on why he likes me. im trying to sort things out but its really hard when you dont know what to say. im trying to get why he does but this is all new to me.

    it hasnt really been lately but im trying to eat less and less and less. and while i was talking to someone online it seemed as though i was becoming more anorexic that just a healthy eater. i dont want to be anorexic its just a solution. a solution to a problem ive dealt with since childhood. being fat. being overweight. being helpless. being big, wide, husky, big-boned.. whatever. it's finaly gotten to me and i can't change it at all. i probably will be anorexic for awhile. i feel so stupid when i eat. like i shouldnt be eating or somethig like its wrong to eat. but i really can't help it. ive been driking water a lot and ive given up on anything other than it. ive even stopped eating cereal so i wont have to have milk. i just want to stop eating like a pig bubt thats no comparison when i start eating like a bird. a little here, a little there. i just think i need help.. anybody out there willing to listen?
    xoxo davie


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howdy.
deadsorrow
2003-06-13 12:41 (link)
heey :P. did you pay for your blurty? you seem to be able to use more html on yours. -linz

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