|Current music:||bleeds no more~silverstein|
My life as of today.
Today, as my father sits on a broken down green crushed velvet couch from the 70's waiting for my brother to wake up so they can head out to the city for as baseball game, my mother and sister sand a deep eggplant purple paint from the walls of our living room/dining room. Everyone seems happy, like a story book family. Sure the furniture is outdated, but thats alright. Its not about the appearance of some ruddy couch my father refuses to throw away. Its the appearance of the people inside the tacky red brick and yellowish green siding two story suburban home which was built, of course in the 70's. The people inside the house, each very different, each pretending that they are unaware of the family's about-to-break secret. My mother, Lois. A short pretty, cheery woman for the most part. Like me she is bored easily, she takes advantage of our lack of knowledge of her work schedule to cheat on my father. She is 48, since December the once overly bubbly and far too loving mother has become weepy, always angry, secretive and a compulsive liar. She'd never tell my father. Oh my father, what to say about him. A 50 yearold chain smoker, a tall thin and frail man, deeply tanned, with jet black hair and bright blue eyes...well they used to be bright blue. The colour has slowly faded, much like any body fat he once had. Hes just bones, drunk, decaying bones. A depressed man, he spends all his time at work or in the basement, trying to finish it, but always tearing things down and starting again. He loves his wife more than life its self. He would kill himself if she ever left. *sigh* The eldest sister, Abbey. An uptight, whiney, and completley un trust worthy person. She is in college, works a part time job. She's obsessed with perfection, a neat freak and well having me live the exact same life she did. Thanks to her I am not allowed to breathe. My brother, a fun quirky 19 yearold clutz. In two weeks he leaves for university. A bachelor of arts in...the undecided. I will miss him, he and I had some sort of messed up understanding. Finally me. A 16 yearold girl, who believes strongly in the beauty of everything. Was once very niave, I no longer believe in love or relationships and trust very few people. I'm hard to make friends with, though I can be nice to people and joke around, to become my friend, a true friend is almost impossible though few have managed. I don't want to like a boy but I do. Boys have done nothing but bad things to me, but that I can get into later.
This is my family situation, friends, I'd rather not get into much detail at the moment. They have confused me so much to this point that I don't even see it worth it to explain. I will mention my friends when I need to.
What am I doing today? NOTHING, I'm not allowed out of my house. I've spent the entire summer in my house. Oh yes, such fun *watches olympics* I hate sports...why the hell am I watching the olympics.
This is it for now....enjoy!
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