Create Journals
Update Journals

Journals
Find Users
Random

Read
Search
Create New

Communities
Latest News
How to Use

Support
Privacy
T.O.S.

Legal
Username:
Password:

Jenn (missing_him) wrote,
@ 2003-04-07 01:01:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Add to Topic Directory  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry

    I was going to write in here when I woke up, but Heatha was on AOL and when she's on AOL, I can't get on my screen name and I won't write in my journal with Internet Explorer after my dad found my livejournal address in his dropdown menu. That wasn't very pretty.

    Anyway, that's beside the point. I had an okay weekend, except for today. Today was too exciting / scary / nervewracking / bad. I was driving home from my dad's house and I totalled my baby. It sucks horribly. ;[ The whole thing was like having an out-of-body experience. I was driving along and it started pouring down rain out of nowhere, so everyone starts creeping along at 30 / 40MPH and halfway between Canton and Terrell, the rain lets up, so everyone speeds up and we're all driving along at 65 / 70MPH. Then we hit traffic, so we slow down to 55 / 60MPH and the truck in front of me slams on his brakes, so I put on my brakes and I'm probably going about 35 / 40 now and he takes his foot off the brakes, speeds up and swerves into the right lane.. because.. well, there's a mini-SUV stopped in the middle of the road. They're turned sideways with their front end in the lane and their back end on the shoulder. There's a grey Dodge truck parked behind them, kinda perpindicular and a Mazda parked next to the truck. Anyway, I see the mini-SUV and try to stop, but my wheels lock up and I start sliding. I'm trying to steer, but.. my car hates me. It really does. Anyway, I hit them going about 40, bounce off, rip my front bumper off, shoot across the right lane of traffic, run over what's left of my bumper and stop in a ditch. I knew what was going to happen as soon as the truck moved over and in the time it took for all of that to happen, the only thought I had was, "This is not happening." And it was over. I stuck my leg out of my smoking car, realized I didn't have the car in park, so I put it in park, got out holding my chest and trying to breathe [both of my airbags deployed] and two people came running up to me, asking if there was anyone else in the car. I told them no, walked out towards the road a bit, asked around for a cell phone [some guy threw his at us from across the highway], called my grandma and my mom to tell them what happened, stood there for a few more minutes trying to catch my breath and breathe without my chest hurting, then realized I needed to get my purse. So I went back to the car, got my purse out, closed the door, realized I needed my keys and my insurance, opened the door again, took my insurance out, looked down at the console and there was a CD laying there.. It had broken perfectly in half and I looked at it for a minute because it hadn't sunk in completely that my car was gone. I stopped for a second and looked around my car to try to take in the damage and it was pretty bad. The windshield was busted, my rearview mirror was at an odd angle and also busted, my sun-visors had come down and popped out of the holder things and the mirrors in them were broken, my CDs were broken or in the front floorboard, my airbags [which were an orange and peachy colour] were floating around sorta and my car wasn't running at all, but I had never turned the engine off. I sat down in the seat, turned the ignition to the "off" position, took my keys out and got out, locked the door, closed it, walked up to the road and squatted there and started shaking. Kim [one of the people that had come up to me when I first went off the road and asked if I was the only one in the car] told me to go sit in her truck and walked me over there, opened the door and helped me in. The rescue crew came a few minutes later and I'm sitting there in her truck, breathing hard and trying not to pass out and one of the guys brings me an oxygen tank thing and another one comes over and takes my blood pressure, asks me where it hurts [chest, upper back, head] and puts a collar on me. Those things are terribly uncomfortable. Then everyone and their damn mama's come over, trying to figure out if I'm okay and taking my blood pressure and all sorts of shit. I remember looking down at their feet and thinking, "They're all wearing such nice shoes.. I hope I don't puke on them." I was extremely dizzy and nauseated at that time, so yanno. I guess that's a natural reaction? They put me on a board, strapped me to the stretcher, made me lay there for quite some time before finally putting me on the ambulance [which was really uncomfortable.. they just shoved me in there and didn't really give a rat's ass if my arm fell off the side of the stretcher and got stuck between the wall and the bed]. The paramedic in there checked me out, stuck an IV in me [at which point my eyes started welling up with tears], then started pressing on various spots in my body to see where the pain was. She cut my shirt open and I started crying. I love[d] that shirt. Then she cut my pants leg open because that hurt too and I cried harder because I adore[d] those pants. Then they transferred me to another damn ambulance and finally took me to the hospital. That took all of about 3o minutes, much longer than it really needed to. I got to the hospital, they transferred me to a hospital bed and I lay there for three fucking hours shaking and beating my hand against my hips [I was hurting!] before I got to see the doctor and while I was waiting, different people came in to ask me what had happened. This one guy came in and was taking notes. We had an interesting conversation. He asked me if I was the only one in the car and I told him yes. Then he asked me if I was the passenger or the driver. Is he for real?! I was laying there thinking, "Do they teach you to be that stupid or does it just come naturally?" Come on.. Let's use a bit of common sense here. Anyway, I lay there for three hours, the doctor comes in and says, "We're going to do some X-rays on you." Yessir, as if I didn't know that already. I went in, had X-rays done [which took another hour], went back to the room and lay there for another hour before the doctor came in and said I was just extremely bruised up. He prescribed me some painkillers and muscle relaxers, then I had to wait 3o minutes before some dumb bitch nurse came in and ripped out my IV. She was cruel. She just stuck a band-aid over it and I looked down at my hand and the pad in the band-aid had already soaked up all the blood it could hold and more was dripping down my hand. I looked up and told her I was bleeding to death over here and she says, "Just mash it down, it'll quit bleeding." Fucking whore. You come over here and mash it down. You ripping it out is the whole reason I'm bleeding to death. Grr. Anyway! She brought me a hospital gown to go home in since all my clothes were cut up and I started trying to figure out how to put it on [I didn't succeed very well..] and Ashley came in, so I bitched about the nurse and we went to sign papers and get me discharged, went to Wal-Green's to get my painkillers and muscle relaxers and came home. I'm pretty tired now. I should probably get to bed, but Joe just got online and I want to talk to him for a bit. I haven't talked to him in quite some time. I miss that kid. :]

    Ah, Chris was cute today. He paged me at 9PM and said he was heading for bed, but he was worried because he hadn't heard from me since this morning so he wanted me to call him when I got home and let him know I was okay, no matter what time it was, so I called him at 10:15PM or so and his mom picked up the phone. I asked for Chris and she says, "Is this Jennifer?" and I said yes and she says, "Chris has been waiting for you to call! Hang on just a minute and I'll let him know you're on the phone!" but she was talking so fast and sounded so excited, it came out as, "Chrishasbeenwaitingforyoutocall! HangonjustaminuteandI'lllethimknowyou'reonthephone!" It amused me. He's going to come over tomorrow after work [I think..] to check up on me. :] Yay. I feel special.

    Adam irritates me. He's been making me feel really unimportant lately.. and I don't feel like I can trust him anymore. A lot of it has to do with the fact that he's dating Amber, which usually wouldn't be such a big deal, but he says that he still loves her and he's the kind of person that shares everything with the person he loves and there's a lot about me that isn't any of Amber's business [i.e. my sex life, my piercings, my sexuality, my religion [[or lack of religion]] and various other things]. To Amber, I'm just someone that's there to be hated, to be lied about and to be used [indirectly since I haven't said a word to her since June of 2oo2]. Anyway, he's cut me out of a lot of his life, but that's not the part that hurts the most. It's the little things that dig into me and make me wish I didn't need / want him as a friend as much as I do.

    Then there's Matt who's just plain annoying. He kept IMing me last night and telling me that he loved me and all that jazz and I told him that he didn't love me, he would never love me and if he did, then I was sorry because there was nothing I could [or would] do about it. Then he went on to say that he's never had anal-sex. What the fuck does that have to do with anything?! Damn Joel for giving Matt my screen name. Then today, Matt paged me and said hey, then paged me twice and told me he loved me and the last page was asking if we could have sex. No, sorry. I'm not interested and I'm certainly not pretending I am. I never reply to his pages and the only thing I say to him online is, "You don't love me. Bye." and that's only because he says he loves me and wants to be with me. He's scary.. and I hate that he knows where I live.

    I'm going to bed. I need to get some laundry done tomorrow if I'm not too horribly sore when I wake up.. and my IV hole is bleeding like a mother again.

    Don't forget to recycle.


(Post a new comment)

hi
runninincircles
2003-04-07 16:09 (link)
hey, i stumbled across your journal and read about your accident. i was just in an accident the other day. i feel your pain, my baby's gone too. but yeah, im adding you to my friends list, so do the same if u want

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: hi
missing_him
2003-04-13 23:49 (link)
I'm sorry your baby's gone. What kind of car did you have? And what'd you name it? I miss my car. ;[

I added you as well. ;]

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

hey
lilgrly98
2003-04-13 23:27 (link)
sorry i didn't read your whole entry but i have homework i need to get started on soon.. but yea i had a diary once on another site and my parents found it.. THAT WAS NOT GOOD.. so now im very careful about it and at a new site... i was wondering.. how do u get html codes to work on this site? like for the scroll bar and stuff? i want to make mine prettier but i can't get the codes to work.. if u wouldnt mind helping me or like just tellin me where to put the codes or how to do it or something i would appreciate it.. thanks!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: hey
missing_him
2003-04-14 00:13 (link)
Parents are way too nosey. :) I wouldn't mind if my dad read my journal if I weren't sexually active, but I am.. and I write about it and I just don't feel like that's a part of my life that my dad needs to know about.

Anyway, as for the HTML, when you go in to modify your journal, there's a section near the bottom after the mood selector that says, "style override." You'd put in a bunch of codes there to do that. I get all of my override codes from www.livejournal.com/~howto because they have more to offer than the blurty how-to site. Check it out. If it doesn't make sense and you're confused, let me know and I'll try to explain what I can. :)

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: hey
lilgrly98
2003-04-14 00:45 (link)
okay so i guess u do the codes differently?? bc i put the codes in that area and they didnt work, so i'll check out that area later.. wut did ur dad say when he found out? like my diary mentioned how i USED TO steal and other stuff and they got mad bout that..

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: hey
missing_him
2003-04-14 23:57 (link)
I don't really like talking about what my dad read, but he did send me an offline message on Y!M saying something along the lines of, "On my computer on the drop down address bar was your journal address so being the nosey SOB I am, I read some entries. You need to message me and tell.. [blah, blah, blah, skip some personal things I only tell close people, blah, blah, blah]. I mean this too. I will kill that fucker dead. You better get in touch with me." Then he called me, so it started a bunch of shit.

Parents always get mad about things that happened in the past and they always sit there and say that they're glad you don't do it anymore; they're just upset because you didn't tell them and inside, they're fuming and thinking up new ways to use this against you in the future. They're friggin' evil. Evil, I say.

Your journal is cute, BTW. ;D

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: hey
lilgrly98
2003-04-15 00:34 (link)
yea i know how that is.. i guess it's because they care but it doesn't always seem like that.. and being nosey and going in personal diary stuff seems to be going a bit too far! but who knows .. maybe i'll be the same if i'm ever a parent... i'm sure they are curious.. well whatever.. oh and thanks about my journal!

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: hey
missing_him
2003-04-15 00:38 (link)
I'll probably be pretty curious about my kid's life too, but I want my kid to be comfortable telling me these things. I want to be the one they go to when they have sex for the first time and I want to be the one they drunk with for the first time. I want to have that kind of relationship with my kid and I obviously don't have that with my parents.

You're quite welcome. :] I'm glad I could be of help.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: hey
lilgrly98
2003-04-15 00:40 (link)
yea my friends mom is like that.. like she could tell her she was drinking and stuff.. and they are just friends.. i want to be friends with my kid like so they can drink and stuff, but I want them to be aware of who they are doing it with and stuff and maybe if we were friends it would make them understand more.. yea but i guess it doesnt matter this early on in life.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: hey
missing_him
2003-04-16 18:56 (link)
Yeah, I'm like that with my stepmom. If I get trashed with a bunch of friends, I can tell my stepmom all about it and we'll laugh and she'll tell me about when she goes out and gets trashed. My mom and I are pretty close too, but she's still motherly. She knows I'm sexually active and she tells me to be careful, to use protection and to get on birth control, but she doesn't sit there and tell me that I'm ruining my life and that I'm doing something bad and she isn't trying to stop me, which is really nice because the consequences of sex are a big deal nowadays.

I love my parents, though. I don't know what I'd do without 'em. :)

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: hey
lilgrly98
2003-04-16 21:59 (link)
yea same here... omg we read my friends mom soemthing on the computer.. it was like some conversation.. and her mom was like i got some roses and i can't figure out who their from and then she's like probably the guy i did quick in the parking lot! ahh we did not need to know that about her mom! lol

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: hey
lilgrly98
2003-04-14 22:28 (link)
hey i really improved my diary ahah.. its not that great but it looks so much better than the lay out they give u .. thanks for that site it worked thanks!!

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


(Post a new comment)

© 2002-2008. Blurty Journal. All rights reserved.