|Current mood:|| disappointed|
|Current music:||Hawthorn Heights|
My arm is really looking bad now. The whole top of my arm has cuts. The scary thing is that I think it's beautiful. It's cool how I can take part of my body and make it into a work of art. And it's all my own. I've taken my pain and turned it into something tangible. And my mom thinks everything is okay. LOL.....
Last night we went to the hospital to see Kristyna and her new baby Makayla. On the way home, I was listening to "Buried a Lie" by Senses Fail on my iPod. I was singing along, and my mom told me to shut up cuz she "didn't like the words". I told her what the song was about, but she wouldn't even listen.
After her saying that, I realized that I'm living a lie to her. She thinks that she knows me so well, when in fact she knows nothing. I can't tell her bout my cuts, I can't share my sexual tendencies or my poetry, and I can't even share the one thing that makes me happiest: music. She hates all of it. So now I'm just this blob of nothing to her, and it makes me really upset. The only people who know anything about me are my friends, and it really shouldn't be that way. I want to be open with my mom. But she would hate me more than she already does. Shit.
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|no worries |
Look i'm 25 years old. I recently had lost my father. Now the only person left is my mom. But growing I felt my parents didn't know me and they didn't. But as I moved and moved on with my life. I relized that damn they don't even now me now. They only here to help take care as you grow and some parents can't even manage that. but anyways, just do your thing and be yourself. I'm as I been though the some thing, that evently your move and get a job doing what you want. Relaize that your mom even though she doesn't not know you as the person you are but she does that she loves and you are her daugther or she wouldn't tell she doesn't like or that. Or tell you to do this or that. if she did not care about you she would not say a word to you. |
Here for you Eric
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|Re: no worries |
I would really love to listen and help out. Don't feel bad if you have prblems or issues I'll listen and try to help. My email address is firstname.lastname@example.org. If you want to email me. For reals write and I will get back to you. |
Hope to here from
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