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lovely_girl (lovely_girl) wrote,
@ 2003-09-02 20:43:00
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    Current mood: tired
    Current music:Rock 104.5 - Seven Song Classic Rock Block

    It's Been A Week And...
    An Update? There isn't too much to say but I've got some time to kill before Travis' house so here goes.

    * * * * * * * * * *

    So Jeremy was talking to me last week. It was kind of weird, so I held my guard up because I had no idea what to expect. He said something to me about "yeah it's your week next week is Jaime again." basically saying he's going to try to play both of us. Well it's cool if Jaime and I are playing him. But for him to know that we think we're doing the playing and for it to backfire is just shitty. So I talked to Jaime and we decided to just quit it altogether and neither of us have talked to him. It's hard because it's Jeremy and everything, but I think I'll really get over everything this time. No, really, I do. I think, though, that this was just a ploy of his to get us to stay away. He likes to do that. He wants to make people dislike him so that he doesn't have to worry about it. Maybe that was a dumb way to put it, but that's how it's always been since I've known him. I think we're both doing it though--the not speaking. I said hi to him last night when he walked in and got nothing. When I said bye to him and Mike last night, I also got nothing. It's not a big deal, BUT DAMMIT I WANT TO BE THE STRONGER COOLER ONE!

    * * * * * * * * * *

    Slowey is back in town. He's been in town since Friday but didn't bother to inform me until last night when I called him. He also informed me that he wanted to take me to Orlando over the weekend to Islands of Adventure for my birthday because his parents have a condo that has got an extra room so there is our free room and board plus our free tickets which he'd already had. And it'd be safe if his parents were there because then it's I know, he's 20 and nearly an adult. But I'd feel more secure anyhow.

    I told him that I already had plans that I couldn't back out of this late in the game and he sounded disappointed. I said we should go next weekend. He said we wouldn't have the free room. I told him I'd be okay springing for a room. But then after I got off the phone I realized this might not be so cool. Mom says that it will be like a date. I do not, by any means, want this to be like a date. I think if I were to do anything with Slowey right now, it'd be a mistake because I just got out of things with Jeremy and everything feels unsteady. I don't want to be involved with Slowey more than I already am. I do not want to give out any mixed signals that could be easily prevented. But I do want to go on the trip. We could go and come back in the same day, but it would be really tiring. This sucks.

    * * * * * * * * * *

    I feel like ass. I have felt like ass since about Friday. It's pretty shitty. I mean, I get a lot of sleep, but that is the only perk. On the downside, my throat annoys me, I cough and sneeze, I am too tired to do anything for very long, I have a stuffed up head, there's an audition on Thursday that I don't feel like screwing up, and the list goes on. Also I am going to go out tonight for a little bit. I want to go out, but at the same time I really do not feel like it. This sucks so bad, feeling like ass.

    And I just thought it'd be nice to let you know.

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