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Aphrodite (lmmcherries) wrote,
@ 2005-05-16 23:15:00
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    First time user
    I hope that this journal will help me to understand myself...I'm at a point in my life where I feel very lost and confused. I think it's becuase I am at that point where I am considered an adult and feel there are so many life choices that I need to make and I don't know what I want. I know one thing for sure...I want to act. That is what makes me happy. I am a very private person. I feel like when things are hard I need to be the person who needs to be strong and dependable to help others through. But I am just breaking apart on the inside. Maybe it's just hormones. Maybe I'm just adjusting to growing up. Maybe, maybe, maybe. I have had some serious family issues lately, my cousin was murdered a year ago and we are now at the time of the trial. I was really strong for my family...I tried not to let my emotions show and now I think everything is catching up with me. My husband wants me to talk to him about these things, but I feel that when I do vent he doesn't really know how to react so it comes across as not caring. So I cry...by myself. I sound like .. like .. a very depressed person and if you only knew who I am in everyday life. I'm happy and in love with life. My favorite thing to do is everyday before I go into one of my rehearsals for a show, I drive around in this little suburban counrty town on the outskirts of DFW and listen to Dave Mathews or Country or my Blues Traveler (yes, I know it's old) cds really loud with the windows down. I probably look like a maniac singing and dancing along with my music. My husband wants to go to bed now (I'm writing in the bed on the laptop). So, I guess my first psych. session went well. I was able to vent. I hope that this will help me out or should I say level me out. I think that is why I love acting so much. I can be anyone freely...I don't have to hold back, and I can pull from myself...the anger at times, the love and passion that I have that I may not show, all of my emotions I can put into one person and just be free. I love that feeling! Good night to all. With love~Aphrodite


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I know what you mean for sure...
lovexmisty
2005-05-17 00:43 (link)
Simply amazing. I can't believe how much it appears that we have in common. I know what you mean about just going through the trials and tribulations of life in general. I,too, am a very optimistic and bouncy person for the most part...and I attempt to let everyone else come to me to vent..release their anger..and confide in..because I feel that's my job as being a friend...but..every now and then..The stress, pressure, and burdens get the best of meh and I juss break down and have a good cry or two.. Welcome to blurty, though. I hope that this journal does, infact, give you the comfort you deserve. I've only been here for a couple of days and that's the exact reason why I joined. Always remember that there is always going to be someone out there who truly cares. =) Well, I hope things get better for you and I hope to see you around on Blurty...maybe we can comment on each other? =)

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Re: I know what you mean for sure...
lmmcherries
2005-05-18 00:06 (link)
I must say I was shocked when I saw that someone had commented on my journal entry already, and perhaps a little scared. I wasn't sure what to expect but it was very nice and refreshing. Thanks though... it's nice to know I'm not actually loosing my mind. I would love to read some of your entries...I'm still trying how to figure out how to use this site. Till then...if you ever need someone to vent to feel free to write to me.

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Re: I know what you mean for sure...
lovexmisty
2005-05-19 01:21 (link)
Aww..Thanks for the offer of comfort and all. Like I said before, I'm not usually the type of person who vents off on others, though..Somehow I manage to keep my calm well enough that I just sit down, take a breath, and usually start doing something creative..I always end up painting, drawing, or writing a poem or two..or...a thousand. =) My poetry is really the only thing that reflects the negative images of me..I dunno. It's just my way of relaxing..you know? Well, remember that I'll be here if you need someone to talk to as well. =) No, you're not losing your mind at all. This world is so complicated and confusing..and if you find relief by writing your problems out and maybe even discussing them..Then, feel free. I'm sure there are plenty of people here that are willing to lend an ear to your sadness and joys, as well. =) Take care!

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