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Lily of the unknown valley (lily_in_pain) wrote,
@ 2003-02-03 21:20:00
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    Current mood: thoughtful
    Current music:My Garden-Heather Alexander

    To live after my time is up..I think not
    You'd think my body would get tired of it. That it'd just stop hurting.

    But it never does. And I'm assuming it never will. I was thinking about advance directives, heroic life saving measures, life support, cancer, organ transplants...

    I decided that I do not want to be on life support (unless it is going to be VERY short term). If I get cancer, if it requires chemo or radiation therapy I won't do it. If I need a transplant (especially a liver), I won't go through it. My body is already dying. Putting it, my family and my psyche through any of that would be too much.

    I don't want to die. But I won't prolong my suffering. No one should. And my medications are likely killing my liver. Why get a second one, to do the same thing.

    So then, why am I here?

    To be with my loved ones, to be loved, and to be the best mother I can be. After that, anything good is gravy.

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