|Current mood:|| confused|
|Current music:||Underoath "A Boy Brushed Red... Living In Black And White|
WHAT SHOULD I DO????
Yesterday after I was let off of work, Ashley gave me a ride home. I went inside and called Kyle. He told me about the phone he wanted to sell for me and I told him that I would give him $10 for it. He asked if he could come over and get the money tonight and maybe hang out afterwards, but I wasnt sure if I wanted him to. I finally agreed to it and we decided that we were gonna hang out and do something. I went downstairs to get my shoes and I told Dad that I was just going outside for a couple of minutes, which was a lie. We got back to Kyle's and we sat there and talked. He said that he was stupid for breaking up with me and that he fucked up. We sat there for a while and then his friend Scott came over. They got high for like an hour and then Scott left. Afterwards Kyle was just all on top of me, kissing me and I had no idea what to do or think about it. We sat on the couch for a while and then he grabbed my hands and we slow danced in the dark to his music. Then he pushed me on his bed and made out. We layed there and it just lead to sex somehow. It was different than with me and Chris because he hurt way worse. I couldnt stand it and I told him to stop at one point. I dont know what to think of it. He wants to be with me, but im so unsure what to do. I want to be with him. I like him a lot, but what will this relationship come to if we already had sex. Is it going to be based on sex? I just dont really dont know what to do. If we do get together again, I just hope it doesnt end the way it did last time.
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