| Current mood: |  blah |
So I've put it off. I'll still make some appearances here and there as long as I don't have to leave, but, I'm staying with Chris and our children. My heart just wouldn't be into it if I went on the whirlwind promotion they had set for me. I know I'm going to disappoint some people, but you can't make everyone happy, and Chris and the kids are what matter to me.
It's a little weird...I've never seen him on the road before. I mean, I of all people understand that you're different when you're touring, but I'm so used to him...Chris Carrabba...the husband and father...not Chris Carrabba the "rock star." He walked back into the room drunk Saturday night...and I was caught off guard. He, of course, was horny...and with Alyssa in the next bed over, I was a bit worried. She woke up from a nightmare and he went to take a shower...upset that she interrupted. She wanted him...not me, but she had to settle for me, because Chris wasn't having any part in it. I'm still not exactly sure whether I'm right to be a little upset about it, but once he got some sleep, everything was fine again. I just... *sighs* I don't know.
So now here I am...watching Alyssa play video games....Chris asleep in the bedroom because he didn't get in until late last night. And my insecurities are getting the best of me. How do I know he hasn't gone back to the old times...to Mike? I trust him, and I know I'm just being stupid, but it's starting to eat at me.
Maybe I should just go home...
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