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Every day, the bible passage I read touches me. No wonder they call it the Word of life. Today's was: "Day and night we burdened and toiled so as not to be a burden to you. We had the right to act otherwise, but we wanted to give you an example." "If anyone is not willing to work, neither should that one eat. ... In the name of Christ Jesus our Lord, we command these people to work and earn their own living. And you, brothers and sisters, do not weary in doing what is right." "If someone does not obey our instruction in this letter, take note and do not have anything to do with him, so that he may be ashamed. However, do not treat him as an enemy, but warn him as a brother." Just before I picked up the bible this morning, I had the prompting that He was telling me I did nothing wrong and shouldn't be afraid or guilty of what happened the day before. I was merely doing my job. I had the responsibility to do my job well at all times, and I shouldn't be ashamed of performing my role even if it should displease anyone. Furthermore, to think of it now, those attitude sux and they never have the courtesy to apologise for errors they make, they simply keep quiet. When it is not their error, they would bear no qualms to voice it out. And maybe it's here, or the same everywhere, but they look at who speaks louder and have greater power and behave differently towards those people. Maybe that is, perfectly human/layman behaviour. We need to work for the results we want to have, not be passive and wait for others to initiate and do the talking/acting. Yet, it is tough sometimes in instances when it does not come naturally. Hopefully, I can continue to strive more successfully to be who he wants me to be, and not "weary at doing what is right". Though sometimes I still question, what is right?? It is sometimes debatable. A friend yesterday said that makes Christian life tougher than life should be. That is agreed, yet, it has its fruits. Gospel reading last Sun read, "He trains those whom He loves." That applies perfectly. Only, hope for the light at the end of the tunnel! The friend also said, we condemn others who do not do "right". Theoretically, we really do not do that. What with the scene of the people who could not cast stones on the prostitute for they are themselves sinners, and other passages which tell us not to judge others. We are told here also "Do not treat him as an enemy, but warn him as a brother." I realised how misunderstood we are, and speaking out what we believe serves as a self-reminder and an affirmation that that is reasonable and not 'extremist'. Today, boss stood up for me at the meeting. Thank God for her and her cheerful disposition, and I really hope not to let her down but to meet and exceed her and their requirements. I learnt yesterday too through our casual meeting with 2 others that I had mistaken her in something which was decided by HR, not her, she did not even know about it. I may not be able to be the subject matter expertise for this role, but is seemingly the smallest prawn in the ocean of fish (which irritates me), but I am learning many other skills such as leading, planning, making decisions, etc. I have space here I could not dream to have in the previous place. And I hope He guides me to excel in what I do here, before perhaps moving on to be SME in another area such as translation. In the meantime before I start on the translation post-grad course next year, I would take on the paracounselling course here and volunteer as a helper, so as not to waste the year. Good chance to figure out whether it is something I like to do as well. Only hope she would allow me to go for the 1-week training. May He lead me on. Amen.
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