| Current mood: |  content |
| Current music: | Wake Up-Coheed And Cambria <3 |
I HATE Myself...More Than I EVER Let On...
Drink up beautiful.
I spiked your cup with angst and a heart attack,
'Cause I've got so much trapped
It's all because of you.
So I figured you might like some back.
And when I see him
I'll tell him what's been on my mind
All these sleepless nights.
He'll recite his excuses
Put my tail between these legs of mine
Like I do all the time.
I can't live my life
knowing you'll be in her arms each time I blink my eyes.
Know what goes on behind my back every night,
afraid I'll never leave,
afraid I'll never know what's good for me.
And when I see him
I'll tell him what's been on my mind
all these sleepless nights.
He'll recite his excuses
Put my tail between these legs of mine
like I do all the time.
And now you say that,
you say you love me.
Well I may have your heart♥
She has your body.
And now you swear that you're being honest,
But you're not honest,
And you never could be.
And when I see him
I'll tell him what's been on my mind
all these sleepless nights.
He'll recite her excuses
Put my tail between these legs of mine
like I do all the time.
Hmm...life is blah lately. I dunno. It could be better, it could be worse. Do I really care about anything anymore? Not really. I'm at a very odd point in my life. Lauren says my heart is closed off. I'm basically at the point where I just want to hurt someone, like I've been hurt. I just want to use someone and make them feel pain. Terrible yes. But atleast I'm honest. I'm sick of being used and letting people get away with it. I want to use someone and show them how it feels to be used. To feel so much pain that it physically hurts. Yea, I'm basically not the person to get mixed up with right now. Lol.
Lauren...baby doll, you know I will love you no matter what. You are my best friend. My everything. You comeplete me. You make me sane. I may be having a hard time showing it, but please know thats still how I feel, and always will feel. Never ever forget that baby doll. Please! I don't think you realize how much I need you. I'm so fucking scared to be replaced by Scott & Bri. I just don't know how to say it to you. I don't ever wanna lose you. Baby, please don't leave me.
Last weekend was pretty cool. Friday it was just me and Mike. Then one Saturday, Sarah came over. Oh man, she hadn't been over in so long. It was awesome. Then my lovely came over. Oh how I love her. Thennn India and Dave came over for a bit. Then India went home and Mike stayed at Dave's house. Today we all just hung out. Hilary came over. Then Lauren left, then Sarah. Then Hialry. Lol. Then me and Mike hung out. He made me take a nap cause he said I seemed wicked stressed and I had a headache. It was nice of him. Lol. Then Cait called and said she was coming to get him and she brought Will. Holyyyyyyy shit. I hadn't seen that kid in forever. I missed him. ♥ Well, I guess thats all I have to say. Just thought I'd update.
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