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trying to convince myself if anything is real (ilori) wrote,
@ 2003-11-03 00:40:00
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    Current mood:indescribable
    Current music:mandy moore, only hope

    i'm awake in the infinite cold . .
    you know . . i always seem to find the words, for everything. and lately it's like i've forgotten how to do -- not everything, but close enough to it. i'm taking a break ; from everyone, and everything.

    i spent the weekend working and hanging out with stephen. saturday was spent working on projects for classes, finishing up papers for anthropology ( i have to write five ). he came by after he finished work and we watched a movie . . sat around and talked, got to know each other a little more. he seems like a nice boy, and i enjoy his company. but i'd rather stay home & watch a video then go out -- he takes the idea of paying for a girl to mean dating, and i'm not up for that yet. it's funny because . . a little while ago? i really, really thought i was. i guess i just came to the conclusion that relationships aren't a big factor in my life right now. i'm very focused on school -- i'm working really hard at my classes, and i know i'm doing well, which gives me a renewed sense of pride i haven't felt for a long time. with the exception of my trip to wafflehouse friday night, i've eatten very healthy this semester, and i only drink pop on the weekends if i go out. the lifestyle changes i've made are subtle, but effective. for a while i stopped going to the gym, because i came down with this weird stomach . . thing. i still can't eat very much, and that was almost a month ago.

    today i spent mostly reading jane goodall's book, through a window for anthropology class . . i want to be finished with it by tuesday, and i got through a good chunk of it today. i watched a walk to remember earlier, hence the reason i'm listening to this song. i don't think i'll ever get tired of this movie -- i really don't. alright, it's late . . i need to get to bed. i hope you're all doing well. bri, i miss you & mark something fierce -- tell him to e-mail me would you? :] meg, i think of you & jim whenever i hear the dixie chicks ' traveling soldier ' . . minus the sad end, of course.

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2003-11-03 15:53 (link)
i love that movie...

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