| Current mood: |  depressed |
| Current music: | ICP-Chicken Huntin' |
Happy Jay the clown as a nursery rhyme...
I'm sick of always being nice to people when they don't deserve it. They treat me like shit, and only use me, and I do everything I can for them. No thanks from anyone.I'm tired of just being the "backup girl". If something doesnt work out with another girl, who does he come to after completely humiliating me and making me feel horrible? Yeah. ME. Well I'm not going to take it anymore! I hate always having to apologize for stuff that I didn't do.
And to top it off, I'm completely disgusted with myself. I look in the mirror and cry. I'm fat, and ugly. I cut and burn myself because I'm already ugly, and I deserve the ugly scars, and pain. People tell me otherwise, but I don't belive it. I believe what I see, and what I've been raised to think of myself. All through middle school I was teased. I would go home and cry, and beg my parents to take me out of school. The school councelers would always call home saying that I needed "outside help" but of course I never went. My dad denyed that his daughter was in need of help. He didn't want to waste his time and money.
Right now, I don't even want to have a birthday/goodbye party anymore. But I don't just want to cancel it because I actually have a few people that might care about seeing me before I move. Idk...maybe It'll change.
(Post a new comment)
(Post a new comment)
|
