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devistated<3 (he1p_wanted) wrote,
@ 2003-10-09 17:26:00
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    Current mood:confused
    Current music:"Blue and Yellow" - The Used

    history DOES repeat itself.
    You fall in love...
    They break your heart..
    It happens again
    and again
    and again.

    You'd think I would get used to it by now. Everyone know's how I'm so in love with Mike and the situation and such. Well I was reading his journal, and kt (his x) commented, and she wrote this lil story saying that his x (me) made them break up. He commented back asking for her back. During this whole time, he is leading ME on. I dont get it. Mike if you are reading this, can you please stop with the mind games. I cant get thru life itself, please dont make things harder...
    Anyways, he gave her an ultimatium she either take her back or they not be friends. I was thinking about doing the same yet I dont want to because he is so in love with her, and I will just hurt myself. He just doesnt understand what he does to me, the way he looks at her, is prolly the same way I look at him. I pretty much worship the ground he walks on. Life is tough. Especially when you are dealing with guys. Ugh..

    You know how they say "if you look for love you will never find it" I think that is what I'm doing. I look for love in Mike so I wont get it from him. Yet I have given up on him so many times.

    It's over.
    We're over.
    Forever this time.

    I cant take the things he does to me. I never knew the person you love with all your heart could make you hate everything else so badly. I guess this is how "life" goes.

    I need something to do this weekend. Erm, all the plans I make never go thru. I was planing on going to phx and chillin' with the guys and Trish. How will I get there, and what the fuck do I tell my madre. I have no idea. Next week is 'fall break' I need something to do that week too. Eh, and I thought I had a life. Guess not. This is about the time, I storm off all mad and upset. Okay maybe not. But I has to pee really bad, so I will be wrapping this all up. Okies. xOxO

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2003-10-09 21:41 (link)
Just so you know, she wasnt saying you broke us up(you only think that because... you think everything applies to you) Also, I gave her that ultimatum because I KNEW she wont get back with me... it was my way of making sure she left me alone for good. Finally... as you said, its over "we're over" there wasn't an "us" in the first place. Your too can also leave me alone now. thanks Bye.


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