|Current mood:|| hopeful|
|Current music:||firefly - breaking benjamins|
so, i'm changing myself, point blank. the old me is broken, i want a shiny new me. and im not waiting till new years, i'm taking action the day after xmas. i need to get in shape, i'm talking like boot camp shape with a side of wicked healthy-ness. i want to start running. i want to be able to wear anything i want without being self-conscious. i want to be able to be hugged without cringing because i feel bad for them having to touch me. i wonder what will happen to all of my food/e.d./self-esteem/obsessive issues. will they all just melt away, or will they push me to go beyond the goals i have set? will i be able to turn it all off and be free? will i be able to sit down to a meal without calculating the calories on my plate while calculating the calories that everyone else is eating as well? i guess i will just have to wait and see...
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